Dude With a Nude ‘Tude Appears Un-Tattooed –
Later: Anybody missing a Harley with dubious stains on the seat?
Next post: Jordan Peterson has a few choice words for the rathole that is Twitter.
Previous post: Something Wonderful 2.0: Murmurations
My head knocks against the stars.
My feet are on the hilltops.
My finger-tips are in the valleys and shores of
universal life.
Down in the sounding foam of primal things I
reach my hands and play with pebbles of
destiny.
I have been to hell and back many times.
I know all about heaven, for I have talked with God.
I dabble in the blood and guts of the terrible.
I know the passionate seizure of beauty
And the marvelous rebellion of man at all signs
reading “Keep Off.”
My name is Truth and I am the most elusive captive
in the universe.
Gerard Van der Leun
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Back in the days when bikes were “ten-speeds”, a high-school acquaintance of mine rode his bike through the girls locker room, nekkid, of course, while shouting “Girls, that ain’t no gear shift!”. The girls P.E. teachers, a pair of lesbians who were a couple, were not amused, but the girls tittered about the episode for weeks.
(snicker) He said tit-tered!
Go to your room.
Dubious Stains would be a good band name.
How the hell can he do that without burning his legs on the exhaust pipes? And if he crashes, he’s going to literally get skinned alive.
Live Fast Die Middle-aged.
Lack of garments has no effect on either of those things.
After warm-up those pipes are 600 degrees and will burn through anything, and if you hit the road at full speed wearing professional leathers you’re still going to be very sore the next day.
OK Ghost, but I gotta allow 16 oz denim jeans saved my butt many times when I found myself on pavement rather than on the saddle.
OK and OK, you can fault my acumen dexterity and riding ability but I still contend if you spend any time with anything with two wheels twixt your legs you need expect to dump at least 4 times a year. Else wise it just ain’t much fun at all.
Oh and the other great bit of wisdom I learned riding down in Florida way back in the pre helmet, face shield days: Never smile while night riding, the bugs splattered on your teeth can be quite annoying.
Jim,
I rode behind a trash truck while chewing gum once. Next thing I knew there was something crunchy in my gum. Yuck.
As far as I can remember most of my motorcycle time was in Florida and California and in FL I always used a full face shield on an easy rider helmet.
https://www.webbikeworld.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/fulmer-v2-easy-rider-69-side.jpg
Been upside down on the pavement enough to know it ain’t fun.
Passed a car once on a 2 lane road and they turned left while I was next to them. No turn signal and never seen me. Both me and the bike went over the car.
A sunny sunday afternoon bike ride on another 2 lane and I was lost in my own world looking around and didn’t see the car in front of me stop. BLAM! Blew the knee out on a brand new pair of Levi’s and erased about a half inch of meat from the patella. Still hurts 45 years later.
The last incident was on a Suzuki 1000 in Torrance, CA. On Western Av I hit some sand on the road and slid sideways, and I was wearing shorts and a T shirt. Plenty of road rash.
I only wore leathers once and they belonged to a friend that was bigger than me when I took a couple laps on his Jawa Speedway bike at practice time at Ascot. Yes, I broke the ass end loose like you have to and I never crashed it. Exhilarating.
Seen the result of a low side crash at 40 mile bend on the Tamiami Trail that made me rather careful about where doing what on two wheels.
A guy, riding a BMW, horizontal jugs, didn’t make it around the bend. His bike was wrapped around a cypress. He’d apparently skipped like a stone across the water to the far side of the canal. He’d been wearing high top, tightly laced Keds sneakers. One shoe, still fully laced was next to the bike, he, sans bike, had changed direction fast enough to pull him right out of the shoe.
Just remembered a buddy of mine here in Alaska also did a low side crash on his BMW. He lived to tell about it but was badly broke, both legs.
Riding on Chena Ridge he didn’t make the turn, he awoke to find himself and the bike around fifty yards off the road in the brush. First waking, he didn’t feel any pain but knew something bad was wrong when he saw his foot in front of his nose. He was able to move his leg back down where it belonged and, even though the real hurting started drag himself back up to the road when a passing motorist found him and took him into the emergency room.
https://youtu.be/0eOHu0rMqMI
Wheeeeee!™
July 22 tag . . . riding in his birthday suit.
Judging by the parking skills, I’d guess that fellow woke up with a Hiroshima grade headache, wondering what happened after the fifteenth beer. His buddies will show him the pics.
JWM