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And now for something completely different: Cheese

Cheese? Yes, because cheese is just milk’s attempt at immortality.

My personal favorite — behind the Queen of Cheeses, Stilton — is the King of Cheeses.

Then again not all cheese achieves immortality in its own lifetime…

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  • Willyruffian December 15, 2020, 5:56 PM

    A wedge of stilton with a ripe pear.

  • Snakepit Kansas December 15, 2020, 6:38 PM

    Geez. Give me a five pound block of Sam’s extra sharp cheddar and let’s call it a day.

  • JPru December 15, 2020, 6:58 PM

    Clemson blue cheese.

  • JPru December 15, 2020, 6:59 PM

    Nudge nudge. Wink wink.

  • Auntie Analogue December 15, 2020, 7:53 PM

    Let’s hope no one in Washington sees this post, or the next thing you know they’ll be telling us how we must start yet another war, put boots on the ground, this time to . . . free the curds.

  • George_Banner December 15, 2020, 9:32 PM

    “Live maggots”

    In my cheese? Naw . . . pass . . .
    In my country? Naw . . . let’s kill them all.

  • PA Cat December 15, 2020, 10:35 PM

    I suspect Gerard is a closet Cheesehead (Brewers/Packers fan). There is a company in Milwaukee that makes about 50,000 Cheesehead hats per year; the MLB version has foam on top of the cheese to represent the beer that all true Brewers fans look for in Miller Park:


  • Casey Klahn December 15, 2020, 11:23 PM

    Eating Provolone on Ritz. Drinking Monkey Shoulder Scotch.

    It took me a long time to figure out the differences is most cheeses is where they are made. Same cheese; different locale. DOH.

    The euros can send their cheese and art supplies, and shut up about politics. Thanks. OK, Brit humor I want that too.

  • Casey Klahn December 15, 2020, 11:24 PM

    Cheeses Cripes, did I just say “cheeses”?

  • ghostsniper December 16, 2020, 4:02 AM

    Make mine Muenster or Smoked Gouda.

  • Missy December 16, 2020, 4:33 AM

    NY state extra sharp cheddar slices from Food Lion. Two bucks. Plus a Honeycrisp apple. Quietly sublime.

  • Comrade Terry December 16, 2020, 5:29 AM

    Oh, what a friend we have in cheeses.

  • Bill in Tennessee December 16, 2020, 5:51 AM

    Back in 2012, the wife and I were in jolly England (it’s NOT so jolly nowadays) and visiting Kew Garden. At the lunch pavilion I had a salad with olive oil and I bit into a most delightful cheese mixed into the salad. Asking for the manager, I asked her what was this cheese, and she graciously went to the back and brought out a nice little piece of blue cheese and let me sample it. Wonder of wonders, I had found my new favorite cheese, which she informed me was England’s best Blue Stilton. I had never tasted it before. So I can now buy it at Trader Joe’s, and I have it every single time I have a salad.

    Call it the “Queen of Cheese” if you like, Gerard, but to me it will always be the best of the cheeses. Especially if maggots are involved in lesser cheeses. For even microscopic tardigrades have (ahem) bodily functions, so there’s that…..

  • Dave December 16, 2020, 6:42 AM

    I did a tour of duty in England and lived in the little village of Ilchester, in Somerset, which has a lovely little Stilton ‘factory.’ I left the West of England loving Stilton, scrumpy and skittles.

  • ghostsniper December 16, 2020, 7:10 AM

    From amazon:

    As opposed to general belief, Stilton in the UK is not AUTHORIZED TO Call the cheese they produce Stilton because it did not originated from the village of Stilton. Stilton can only be made in three counties Leicestershire, Nottinghamshire and Derbyshire which are the only three authorozed to call their cheese “Stilton” The village of Stilton calls their cheese “Bells Blue”.The ruling has been welcomed by food manufacturers in Melton Mowbray – widely regarded as the birthplace of the cheese.

    Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2472681/Village-Stilton-BANNED-making-cheese-bears-officials-refuse-bend-EU-rules.html#ixzz4wONlzw1q
    Follow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook see less
    By Pi Mackenzie on October 24, 2017

  • Aggie December 16, 2020, 7:39 AM

    Some may enjoy some of that Sardinian Cazu Marsu maggot cheese with a nice cuppa Kopi Luwak (the second-harvest civet coffee), but me, a nice bitey sharp cheddar with some warm home-made apple pie and maybe some vanilla-bean ice cream – that’s livin’ large.

  • BillH December 16, 2020, 7:41 AM

    I’d like to put in a plug for Velveeta, for a friend who is too shy to.

  • TeeRoy Jenkins December 16, 2020, 8:06 AM

    gubmint cheese! The stuff the lunch ladies used to make the baked macaroni n cheese back at PS 125 in NYC circa 1973. (Forgive me, im not a cultured man)

  • Lance de Boyle December 16, 2020, 8:20 AM

    Wallace and Grommit do cheese….

  • Sam L. December 16, 2020, 8:37 AM

    Cheezzit, the Cops!!! (I’ve always wanted to say that.)

  • Andrew aka ARGH One December 16, 2020, 8:49 AM

    Had his father not changed his last name, and if he had not turned down a life peerage, we would be calling John Cleese, Lord John Cheese!

  • Bandmeeting December 16, 2020, 10:17 AM

    I always go to Paxton and Whitfield on Jermyn Street when in London.

  • Jewel December 16, 2020, 10:18 AM

    My husband and I were shopping here: https://sclydeweaver.com
    where I once worked as a baker in charge of making steel cut oats, sticky buns, cheese bread, etc. A lovely sweat shop it was too. They smoke their bacon and import the loveliest British cheeses and Danish butter.
    Sorry, I digress. But there we were, sampling the most delicious cheddars, and we tasted a cheese that makes you giggle! It does! It’s called Red Storm, and it’s made by Snowdonia Cheeses.
    Something about the tingle on the tongue, I suppose, but everyone had the same reaction. Every Christmas, we get a nice wedge. It’s expensive, but the giggles are so worth it.

  • Gordon Scott December 16, 2020, 10:44 AM

    The wife’s recipe for alfredo starts with: 1/2 pound of a Parmesan that’s old enough to drive

  • Wade December 16, 2020, 5:14 PM

    Best cheese I ever had ( and I’ve been all over the world sampling cheeses ) and surprisingly a newer and a completely pure American take and creation.

    Beecher’s Flagship Cheese.

    A bit pricey but can be found in a lot of markets nationwide with decent gourmet cheese sections.

    “Beecher’s Handmade Cheese opened its doors in Seattle’s historic Pike Place Market in November of 2003. Flagship is a semi-hard cow’s milk cheese with a uniquely robust, nutty flavor. It is carefully aged for 15 months to fully develop its complex flavor and ever-so-slight crumble.”

  • Bear Claw Chris Lapp December 17, 2020, 7:44 AM

    Gerard how about cougar cheese. Comes from your part of the country but I was introduced to it years ago here in flyover country. Got to taste some again this last weekend camping in the cold and Sunday morning snow. Very good cheese.

  • Jerry Bowen December 17, 2020, 8:31 AM

    My grandfather liked a cheese spread that came in a earthenware jar with a metal bail lid.
    That was 60 years ago, I can’t find it anywhere now but search for a recipe for ‘Old English Potted Cheese’ and make it yourself. Great on a cracker or baguette.

  • gwbnyc December 17, 2020, 4:54 PM

    our name, welsh, is ab owen, son of owen, of owen’s family. owen being as the germanic “eugen”, “g’s” liking to be “w’s”.

    meaning “good”.

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