First, Let's Talk About My Pumpkin @ AMERICAN DIGEST

October 17, 2009

First, Let's Talk About My Pumpkin

Click Me and Grow Big

The Pumpkin that Ate My Backyard

It began as a $1.49 seedling at Home Depot which I bought for my step-son to plant.

He planted it, as heedless 9-year-old boys will, in an obscure corner of a sandy bed under some ice-plants. It seemed to me at the time that the pumpkin was going to have a short and shady life.

But then, after about a month, it seemed to suddely clamber across my terrace. Then it strangled the corn plants. That gave it HUNGER and it ate the chair. When it approached the deck it lunged, fell back and sprouted this "fruit" of the vine.

Now the pumpkin is trying to invade my neighbor`s yard. Last night I heard them outside calling plaintively for their new puppy to come back in, "Sloopy! Little Sloopy! Sloopy, come!"

But answer came there none...

Posted by Vanderleun at October 17, 2009 3:19 AM

Comments:

HOME
"It is impossible to speak in such a way that you cannot be misunderstood." -- Karl Popper N.B.: Comments are moderated and may not appear immediately. Comments that exceed the obscenity or stupidity limits will be either edited or expunged.

I give up.

I was in the middle of writing about the horrid pumpkin and here you've said it all in 150 words, give or take.

I have three sentences on the gourd's gross, smelly innards alone. Fuck it. I'm pouring three fingers of bourbon and calling it a day.

Posted by: Daphne at October 17, 2009 2:03 PM