WHEN in the course of human Events, it becomes necessary….
Dairy Queen Princess
byVanderleunonFebruary 18, 2022
Hard to believe the first Dairy Queen opened back in Joliet, Illinois in 1940
The soft-serve ice-cream giant began business in Joliet, Illinois, on June 22, 1940, with Sherb Noble as its founder. Soft-serve ice cream was created by John Fremont McCullough and his son Alex in Iowa in 1938. Noble and McCullough were friends; Noble offered to sell the new style of ice cream in his Kankakee ice-cream shop. The ice cream was a big hit, leading the team to open the first Dairy Queen. It was one of the first food chains to offer franchises, and went from only 10 stores in 1941 to over 6,
When I get hot and sweaty from workin’ in the sun,
I head down to her corner for a tall, cold, frosty one.
When I’m with my DQ princess I’m never there alone.
For just another dollar, she’ll gladly dip my cone.
My baby’s a Princess of the Dairy Queen.
I crave her flavor. She don’t treat me mean.
She’s a smooth vanilla softy. She’s the center of the scene.
My baby’s a Princess of the Dairy Queen.
My baby makes me order my big banana frozen.
The boys line up to see her. She’s the one that’s chosen.
She’s just a small town mama but still an ice cream star.
She’s the only one around who’ll grab your Dilly Bar.
My baby’s a Princess of the Dairy Queen.
I crave her flavor. She don’t treat me mean.
She’s a steamed hot chocolate malted. She’s the center of the scene.
My baby’s a Princess of the Dairy Queen.
She ‘s got a long blonde ponytail, wears tight white shorts,
With a polka dot bikini top. She plays all the midnight sports,
And she’ll whip you up a sundae, maybe top it with a cherry,
But tomorrow she’ll be serving it to Curly, Moe, or Larry.
My baby’s a Princess of the Dairy Queen.
I crave her flavor. She don’t treat me mean.
She’s deep-fried tofu toffee. She’s the center of the scene.
My baby’s a Princess of the Dairy Queen.
Down at her DQ she’s some games that you can play,
Like “Ninja Warrior Pinball,” or “CyberRoad to Mandalay.”
She’s workin’ hard for tips all the big boys wanna slip her.
She’ll gladly change your dollars and let you pump the flippers.
My baby’s a Princess of the Dairy Queen.
I crave her flavor. She don’t treat me mean.
She’s a deep dip Dilly Bar. She’s the Blizzard Breeze supreme.
My baby’s a Princess of the Dairy Queen.
She’s the town’s roadside attraction.
She’s the center of the summer’s action.
It’s just a little job — pumping soda for the jerks.
It don’t pay all that much, but she’s never out of work.
My baby’s a Princess of the Dairy Queen.
I crave her flavor. She don’t treat me mean.
She’s a hot fudge filly. She’s the center of the scene.
My baby’s a Princess of the Dairy Queen.
We stopped into the DQ in Nelson, BC, and were driving a big, shiny land yacht motor coach that we had rented for our vacation to Banff last summer. It was an old timey DQ just as pictured.
Some asshole pulled up to the motor coach as I was testing a parking spot, and had nothing really to say except to give the friendly Cannuck “you aint from around here” trip. As near as I could tell, he must’ve been trying to shit on me for having too much of his climate, or something. I gave him the friendly but essential go to hell, in not exactly those terms.
Climate is too precarious for you to go to DQ, don’t you know.
Also got shit on today about my antique parlor pot belly stove. It is an absolute thing of beauty, but a real enviro-killer. My inner glee is evident, I know. Draw them out.
Anyway, back to the enjoyment of this dilly of a post.
ArtyFebruary 21, 2022, 8:00 AM
Speaking from experience, southern BC has more than its share of assholes.
ghostsniperAugust 9, 2018, 2:35 PM
Rassiss! They only have white ice cream.
Jim in OxfordFebruary 21, 2022, 3:19 AM
If your local DQ has it (as do most in SW OH), ask for chocolate ice cream. DQ’s vanilla is truly classic vanilla taste, but with two of my favorite Blizzards — Sea Salt Toffee Fudge and Choco Brownie Extreme — I always ask for them to be made with chocolate. It’s perfect for a chocoholic . . .
There used to be a DQ within walking distance of my house. Had an A&W, too.
Now we have In n’ Out. I love their burgers, but it’s so busy you just can’t get near the place.
Went to my first when I was a child in Methuen, MA, sometime late 40’s, maybe early 50’s. My parents took us there regularly.
Friendly’s eventually had a restaurant across the street sorta. And the ‘Pike had lots of HOJO’s. Great times. Real America. Real Americans. Lost cause.
ghostsniperAugust 10, 2018, 4:31 AM
@jwm, sounds like the name should be changed to “Hurry N Wait”.
Ann K.August 10, 2018, 5:57 AM
In the Lone Star State, they’re called Texas stop signs.
Back in the olden days when we walked up hill both ways through three feet of snow to get to middle school, the DQ we passed began to offer dogs & burgers and such. We all saved our lunch money so we could eat at the Dairy Queen on the walk home– up hill through three feet of snow.
My god, I’m getting old.
ghostsniperAugust 10, 2018, 7:03 AM
getting? HA!
BillHAugust 10, 2018, 8:02 AM
I grew up on frozen custard. Started in the mid-30s when my Dad took us to the county fair each fall. Then as times got better, frozen custard stands started showing up in our town and I would get one whenever I could round up 5¢. When DQ showed up in our town I was a teener and had to try it. DQ tasted like watered down frozen custard to me. I stuck with frozen custard until the custard stands started disappearing, due to high ingredient costs I suspect. Didn’t cotton to DQ the first time, and never have cared for it much.
I very briefly was one of a series of boyfriends of the cutest blonde pixie of a girl, who worked at Dairy Queen. Everything about her was pert from her nose to her … well everything.
Princess? No, when she was at DQ she was always in motion. She worked quickly and enthusiastically, as she did everything else. It didn’t last long, but it was memorable.
She was my Dairy Queen Milk Maid. I never go by a DQ without thinking about her. That’s one story I never told my wife.
ZaphodFebruary 18, 2022, 5:33 PM
@JohnTheRiver: Sounds like Ms DQ was exhibiting Fast Life History Strategy as Ed Dutton would put it.
Dairy Queen is big in Thailand. The last time I had the pleasure was when waiting for a flight at Udon Thani Airport. Their perhaps locally adapted chili hotdog was so good I went back for seconds. Alas none of that DQ goodness in HK. Plenty in Shenzhen, Zhuhai, and Macau. So near and yet so far.
We have a DQ, roughly five blocks from our home. After 1700, you can hardly access the place, it’s still that popular. Old school values, a great product for a reasonable price. We know the owner, he’s like 90/91 now, he’s giving the business to his daughters, they will do a fine job, squared away gals.
Irk
Andrew RFebruary 19, 2022, 8:17 AM
About twenty years ago I went down Illinois Route 1 to Danville for a high power rocketry event. Every little farm town we pased through had either a Dairy Queen or a Dairy Whip,usually within spitting distancce of the toens corn silos. Makes me want to retrace the trip today to see how many of those are still around.
Real World Address for Donations, Mash Notes and Hate Mail
Gerard Van der Leun
1692 MANGROVE AVE
APT 379
Chico, Ca 95926
Green Pants Interior by Klahn
Who Am I? by Carl Sandburg
My head knocks against the stars.
My feet are on the hilltops.
My finger-tips are in the valleys and shores of universal life.
Down in the sounding foam of primal things I reach my hands and play with pebbles of destiny.
I have been to hell and back many times.
I know all about heaven, for I have talked with God.
I dabble in the blood and guts of the terrible.
I know the passionate seizure of beauty
And the marvelous rebellion of man at all signs reading “Keep Off.”
My name is Truth and I am the most elusive captive in the universe.
Duty, Beauty, Liberty, Country, Honor, Family, Faith — Plus a few simple easy to follow rules for guys
Men saw the stars at the edge of the sea
They thought great thoughts about liberty
Poets wrote down words that did fit
Writers wrote books
Thinkers thought about it
Take it where you find it
Can’t leave it alone
You will find a purpose
To carry it on
Mainly when you find it
Your heart will be strong
About it
Many’s the road I have walked upon
Many’s the hour between dusk and dawn
Many’s the time
Many’s the mile
I see it all now
Through the eyes of a child
Take it where you find it
Can’t leave it alone
You will find a purpose
To carry it on
Mainly when you find it
Your heart will be strong
About it
[Chorus]
Lost dreams and found dreams
In America
In America
In America
Lost dreams and found dreams
In America
In America
In America
And close your eyes
Leave it all for a while
Leave the world
And your worries behind
You will build on whatever is real
And wake up each day
To a new waking dream
Take it where you find it
Can’t leave it alone
You will find a purpose
To carry it on
Mainly when you find it
Your heart will be strong
About it
[Chorus]
Change, change come over
Change come over
Talkin’ about a change
Change, change
Change come over, now
Change, change, change come over
I’m gonna walk down the street
Until I see
My shining light
I’m gonna walk down the street
Until I see
My shining light
I’m gonna walk down the street
Until I see
My shining light
I’m gonna walk down the street
Until I see
My shining light
I see my light
See my light
See my shining light
I see my light
See my light
See my shining light
Gerard Van der Leun
Comments on this entry are closed.
That’s a nice cool down post. Thanks, Gerard!
We stopped into the DQ in Nelson, BC, and were driving a big, shiny land yacht motor coach that we had rented for our vacation to Banff last summer. It was an old timey DQ just as pictured.
Some asshole pulled up to the motor coach as I was testing a parking spot, and had nothing really to say except to give the friendly Cannuck “you aint from around here” trip. As near as I could tell, he must’ve been trying to shit on me for having too much of his climate, or something. I gave him the friendly but essential go to hell, in not exactly those terms.
Climate is too precarious for you to go to DQ, don’t you know.
Also got shit on today about my antique parlor pot belly stove. It is an absolute thing of beauty, but a real enviro-killer. My inner glee is evident, I know. Draw them out.
Anyway, back to the enjoyment of this dilly of a post.
Speaking from experience, southern BC has more than its share of assholes.
Rassiss! They only have white ice cream.
If your local DQ has it (as do most in SW OH), ask for chocolate ice cream. DQ’s vanilla is truly classic vanilla taste, but with two of my favorite Blizzards — Sea Salt Toffee Fudge and Choco Brownie Extreme — I always ask for them to be made with chocolate. It’s perfect for a chocoholic . . .
There used to be a DQ within walking distance of my house. Had an A&W, too.
Now we have In n’ Out. I love their burgers, but it’s so busy you just can’t get near the place.
JWM
This DQ hasn’t changed much since my grandfather took me there in the early 1970s.
https://www.tripadvisor.com/Restaurant_Review-g60024-d4625578-Reviews-Dairy_Queen-Lake_Nebagamon_Wisconsin.html
Went to my first when I was a child in Methuen, MA, sometime late 40’s, maybe early 50’s. My parents took us there regularly.
Friendly’s eventually had a restaurant across the street sorta. And the ‘Pike had lots of HOJO’s. Great times. Real America. Real Americans. Lost cause.
@jwm, sounds like the name should be changed to “Hurry N Wait”.
In the Lone Star State, they’re called Texas stop signs.
Mandatory rest and snack stop for every intra-Texas road trip.
Back in the olden days when we walked up hill both ways through three feet of snow to get to middle school, the DQ we passed began to offer dogs & burgers and such. We all saved our lunch money so we could eat at the Dairy Queen on the walk home– up hill through three feet of snow.
My god, I’m getting old.
getting? HA!
I grew up on frozen custard. Started in the mid-30s when my Dad took us to the county fair each fall. Then as times got better, frozen custard stands started showing up in our town and I would get one whenever I could round up 5¢. When DQ showed up in our town I was a teener and had to try it. DQ tasted like watered down frozen custard to me. I stuck with frozen custard until the custard stands started disappearing, due to high ingredient costs I suspect. Didn’t cotton to DQ the first time, and never have cared for it much.
That’s a frequent exchange between my wife and me:
“Shit, I’m gettin’ old, here…”
“You’re not getting old, you’re there.”
Beats the alternative.
JWM
Step right up and see the very rare women’s urinal in the Dairy Queen located in beautiful downtown Port Charlotte, Florida.
http://urinal.net/dairy_queen/
Dismissed.
The other Texas Stop Sign is, of course, Whataburger which is altogether different in a good way.
After I got exiled to Kansas, I found this homebrew chain that will make you throw rocks at In N Out because “it just tastes better”:
https://www.spanglesinc.com/locations
Where I came from was poor. We could only “Tastee Freeze” in small ND towns. And we liked it.
I very briefly was one of a series of boyfriends of the cutest blonde pixie of a girl, who worked at Dairy Queen. Everything about her was pert from her nose to her … well everything.
Princess? No, when she was at DQ she was always in motion. She worked quickly and enthusiastically, as she did everything else. It didn’t last long, but it was memorable.
She was my Dairy Queen Milk Maid. I never go by a DQ without thinking about her. That’s one story I never told my wife.
@JohnTheRiver: Sounds like Ms DQ was exhibiting Fast Life History Strategy as Ed Dutton would put it.
Dairy Queen is big in Thailand. The last time I had the pleasure was when waiting for a flight at Udon Thani Airport. Their perhaps locally adapted chili hotdog was so good I went back for seconds. Alas none of that DQ goodness in HK. Plenty in Shenzhen, Zhuhai, and Macau. So near and yet so far.
Real dog has that appeal.
We have a DQ, roughly five blocks from our home. After 1700, you can hardly access the place, it’s still that popular. Old school values, a great product for a reasonable price. We know the owner, he’s like 90/91 now, he’s giving the business to his daughters, they will do a fine job, squared away gals.
Irk
About twenty years ago I went down Illinois Route 1 to Danville for a high power rocketry event. Every little farm town we pased through had either a Dairy Queen or a Dairy Whip,usually within spitting distancce of the toens corn silos. Makes me want to retrace the trip today to see how many of those are still around.
Banana Split Blizzards – that is all.