July, 1942
Today’s Top Headlines from America’s Newspaper of Record, The Babylon Bee
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WHEN in the course of human Events, it becomes necessary….
Welcome to the New American Digest: 2001-2022
After scanning its face again and again,
I began to scale it, picking my holds
With intense caution. About half-way
To the top, I was suddenly brought to
A dead stop, with arms outspread
Clinging close to the face of the rock
Unable to move hand or foot
Either up or down. My doom
Appeared fixed. I MUST fall.
There would be a moment of
Bewilderment, and then,
A lifeless rumble down the cliff
To the glacier below.
My mind seemed to fill with a
Stifling smoke. This terrible eclipse
Lasted only a moment, when life blazed
Forth again with preternatural clearness.
I seemed suddenly to become possessed
Of a new sense. My trembling muscles
Became firm again, every rift and flaw in
The rock was seen as through a microscope,
My limbs moved with a positiveness and precision
With which I seemed to have
Nothing at all to do.
My head knocks against the stars.
My feet are on the hilltops.
My finger-tips are in the valleys and shores of
universal life.
Down in the sounding foam of primal things I
reach my hands and play with pebbles of
destiny.
I have been to hell and back many times.
I know all about heaven, for I have talked with God.
I dabble in the blood and guts of the terrible.
I know the passionate seizure of beauty
And the marvelous rebellion of man at all signs
reading “Keep Off.”
My name is Truth and I am the most elusive captive
in the universe.
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Babylon Bee is wonderful. Just how wonderful it is is confirmed by the fact that Snopes fact-checks it.
I’ve been kicked off Twitter, so I don’t get to see her wisdom as much anymore, but Titania McGrath (Andrew Doyle’s alter-ego) is almost as much fun as the Bee. One of my favorites:
Titania McGrath: “Future generations will thank us if we successfully eliminate heterosexuality.”
You don’t have to be “on” twitter to read twitter. Just enter
https://twitter.com/TitaniaMcGrath
And you are right there. Pro tip… just click close if it asks you to login.
Thanks Steve, living out here in Oak Ridge NC, and working in G’boro, you know our Governor is an a$$hole. Need the laffs.
Joe Biden staff meeting:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Rzao52ndNA
“Fake news you can trust,” indeed. They’re more accurate than most of our mainstream news sources.