… to accommodate his enormous balls.
![[Bumped] Regarding an Impromptu Boogaloo: George Banner has some tactical observations and advice](https://americandigest.org/wp/wp-content/uploads/2020/11/intheboogaloo.png "[Bumped] Regarding an Impromptu Boogaloo: George Banner has some tactical observations and advice")
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Previous post: It Was Greek to Me
After scanning its face again and again,
I began to scale it, picking my holds
With intense caution. About half-way
To the top, I was suddenly brought to
A dead stop, with arms outspread
Clinging close to the face of the rock
Unable to move hand or foot
Either up or down. My doom
Appeared fixed. I MUST fall.
There would be a moment of
Bewilderment, and then,
A lifeless rumble down the cliff
To the glacier below.
My mind seemed to fill with a
Stifling smoke. This terrible eclipse
Lasted only a moment, when life blazed
Forth again with preternatural clearness.
I seemed suddenly to become possessed
Of a new sense. My trembling muscles
Became firm again, every rift and flaw in
The rock was seen as through a microscope,
My limbs moved with a positiveness and precision
With which I seemed to have
Nothing at all to do.
My head knocks against the stars.
My feet are on the hilltops.
My finger-tips are in the valleys and shores of
universal life.
Down in the sounding foam of primal things I
reach my hands and play with pebbles of
destiny.
I have been to hell and back many times.
I know all about heaven, for I have talked with God.
I dabble in the blood and guts of the terrible.
I know the passionate seizure of beauty
And the marvelous rebellion of man at all signs
reading “Keep Off.”
My name is Truth and I am the most elusive captive
in the universe.
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We should petition those dictionary folks to put this gentleman’s picture next to the word “gutsy.”
Remember that extremely funny vid with Snoop Dog saying “Wally Gator”?
I’ve been a hunter since I was old enough to make rubber band guns and kill moths at around 6 or 7, Natchez, MS around 1956-57. I’ve never grown tired of the blood sports and I plan to bow hunt again this year from a climbing tree stand, IPF and all. Then, when it’s cooler I’ll get after ’em with my Roberts.
I’ve seen a lot of incredibly idiotic and non-sensical stuff in life too but the one simple thing I cannot understand is why Florida permits alligators to reside in its residential ponds and small lakes. And, on top of that, the damned things are protected by the State. Gators are apex predators and they will just as soon eat a human or pet as a decaying turtle and the job they do in the killing has to be seen to be appreciated.
A smallish one, like the denizen captured by D’Quandra, is fully capable of seriously wounding an adult and killing and eating a child or a large dog. I scratch my head……
The US Government protects gators, wolves, bears, coyotes and weird snails and such, but refuses to extend this courtesy to its own citizens.
If one of those reptilian devils approached a child in Florida, and the child’s father shot the gator, that father would be headed for jail.
There was a gas station owner near my mother’s retirement community in Brooksville who kept a guard gator in his office after closing at night to discourage the local burglars.
I’d bet a dollar to a donut that house was in a gated community, probably with a golf course. People pay big money to live in places like that, probably more than a million for a normal house in there. Part of the draw for those places is the idea of natural wildlife of which gators are members. Mostly, gators tend to mind their own business and stay wilderness oriented.
While it is illegal to harm or kill a gator it is also illegal to feed them. Not even a single french fry. Because, just like humans, they will become addicted to them instantly and seek them out. Same with popcorn, or any number of things “caring” people do, in violation of the law. Then, after the popcorn dealer has hooked the gator on his brand new fix the dealer gets all bent out of shape when the gator comes looking for it’s next fix.
Many, many years ago this issue was self resolving, back when people knew how to think and accepted nature as it was rather than how they’d like it to be. If it was up to me the wealthy people in the gated communities would not get their wish for a “natural Florida wildlife yard art” and the gators would be transported to a place more suitable for them, like the glades. As it is, when a gator is reported to have done wrong by a human the default reaction is for the authorities to shoot it on sight. In typical gov’t fashion, a loss for all involved, and a sense of bravado for the gov’t drone that killed it.
As far as Mikes comment below about the gov’t (not) protecting it’s citizens.
If for some reason I wanted someone to protect me it certainly would not be by entities that have demonstrated millions of times, gross incompetency, irresponsibility, and unaccountability, not to mention unbelievably enormous costs most likely in perpetuity.
In actuality the man doing the canning of the gator is a black Army vet and all the neighbors from nearby appear to be black as well. Gated? Maybe.
Dear ghostsniper:
1. The best situation would be in the government simply left all citizens alone and no noisome agencies were around to protect anybody.
2. The second best situation would be if the government decided that its citizens needed protecting. Agencies would be created to do just that, and taxes went up to pay for them.
3. The third best situation would be if the government decided that its citizens needed protecting and agencies would be created to do just that, but through incompetence and stupidity these agencies accomplished nothing. Taxes still went up to pay for them.
4. The worst situation would be if the government decided that its citizens needed protecting, agencies would be created to do just that, but these agencies decided to use their power to control citizens rather than protect them. Taxes still went up to pay for them.
We are at number four.
“See ya later, alligator!”
As a life-long Florida native, and well aware of the dangers of these critters, I have to say that that is most bad-ass thing I’ve ever seen…
Kept a wee one, a foot or so, for about a week in the dorm sink when I was at U of F in Gainesville over 60 years ago.
Walked him around campus on a string leash. Many if not most wore flip flops, thongs, whenever the little gator saw a moving toe he’d lunge, snap at it. If you think about the most common response to his actions, you understand where he got the name Damnit.
Didn’t turn out to be as good a chick magnet as I’d hoped.
& yep, took him back to the pond I found him in.
Ack. Should have made Damnit into a purse.
Better chick magnets: 1. money; 2. Mercedes; 3. masculine beauty.
Choose two out of three. I only had one of these, but that was quite good enough.
Best chick magnets-
Being very tall and “proportionately gifted”
A broad sense of humor.
A classic Harley-Davidson, AKA the “Milwaukee Vibrator.”
The ability to perform the entire Chinese alphabet with one’s tongue on a “soft surface.”
Damn. My list just got longer. I always had a sense of humor, mainly gained through stupidity and thus laughing at myself.