October 9, 2009

There He Is.... Miss-ter A-MER-I-CA!: Nobel Committee Now Officially Not Worth the Dynamite It Would Take to Blow Them Away

"I'd like to thank all the little people."

The Fix Was In: Worth noting, Obama took office less than 10 days before the Feb. 1 deadline for Nobel Prize nominations. -- @markknoller

2:09 AM You always knew those beauty contest declarations about "world peace" would pay off. And without even having to put on a bikini. US President Obama Wins Nobel Peace Prize

U.S. President Barack Obama won the Nobel Peace Prize on Friday for his calls to reduce the world's stockpile of nuclear weapons and working for world peace.
Plus his signal accomplishments so far in office, "Jack" and "Shit." Now the whole world has an imaginary friend. And like all beauty queens he looks good in a thong.

[Note: Since this broke at about 2:10 PST Twitter's been running at about 2,000 tweets a minute... the vast majority going to "WTF?"]

Update 2:39 PST: The Norwegians squeak as only the Norwegians can squeak:

The Nobel Peace Prize 2009 - Press Release Obama has as President created a new climate in international politics. Multilateral diplomacy has regained a central position, with emphasis on the role that the United Nations and other international institutions can play. Dialogue and negotiations are preferred as instruments for resolving even the most difficult international conflicts. The vision of a world free from nuclear arms has powerfully stimulated disarmament and arms control negotiations. Thanks to Obama's initiative, the USA is now playing a more constructive role in meeting the great climatic challenges the world is confronting. Democracy and human rights are to be strengthened.
(Yes, that's the last sentence. A bit strangled, what? And the syntax only underscores the flat meaningless of this award. Pure semantic garbage.)

Update: Faster than a lumbering newspaper: Twitter / chapomatic: @Vanderleun Even with the update you beat the New York Times by about twenty minutes. Wow.

CBS News White House Correspondent Mark Knoller notes @ Twitter: "The Nobel Committee risks being discredited for a political decision honoring aspirations for peace rather than a concrete accomplishment." Risks? Already done. Years ago. This just tamps the dirt down on the grave.

Update: Accomplishments are not the only thing that's a bit fuzzy about this "moment." Here's a screen shot of the Nobel announcement page at 3:07:


Rather symbolic, isn't it?

Somewhere in the private quarters of the White House, two people are having a big, big laugh.

But not, I fear, the last laugh in this rolling farce.

Posted by Vanderleun at October 9, 2009 2:15 AM
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"It is impossible to speak in such a way that you cannot be misunderstood." -- Karl Popper N.B.: Comments are moderated and may not appear immediately. Comments that exceed the obscenity or stupidity limits will be either edited or expunged.

Credibility and decorum have most certainly died on the world stage. This is simply more nourishment for the mega ego that this affirmative action recipient posesses. Now I know for sure - one has to do absolutely nothing to achieve "greatness" in our world today. Accomplishment and responsibility exist no more. The Perter Principle is alive and well.


Posted by: Da Dog at October 9, 2009 3:33 AM

Words fail me. This is a moral nadir.

Posted by: ahem at October 9, 2009 3:41 AM

Yes, I do have something to say. This award will only justify him in his own stupidity and end by costing untold innocent lives down the road.

Posted by: ahem at October 9, 2009 3:50 AM

"I used to be disgusted. Now I try to be amused."
Elvis (Costello that is).

Posted by: RKV at October 9, 2009 4:26 AM

Sorry, since when did the Nobel Peace prize have any credibility? Not since Al Gore won his prize at least.

Heck, I'm surprize that Pol Pot hasn't been nominated yet.

Posted by: pdwalker at October 9, 2009 4:29 AM


This is great news!

I mean, imagine. Just last night I was praying for world peace and Ka-BLUIE! The headlines this morning.

I’ll tell you, I want my fair share of that prize, though. I mean, after all…my prayer.

Anyways, wow! Just think of it, while standing athwart 13 billion years of evolution, world peace lands on my doorstep. Me. Wow.

Well, it would have if I hadn’t canceled my subscription.

Anyway, World Peace Achieved, am I right? We sure as hell don’t have to imagine it any longer.

Here’s my problem though, well, our problem really, since we’re all in this together, what do we do with all the Bibles? Korans too, I suppose… I mean’ I just threw mine in the recycling bin...But, what about everybody else? That’s a lot of garbage!

Well, at least I don’t have to do all that praying anymore! That’s pretty good.

Speaking of recycling, we should convert all our prayer time to prayers of thanks. 13 billion years of that should do it, I think.

That’ll be in the Sunday edition probably. With instructions and info-graphic. You know what? We are gonna need a lot of bumper stickers to let people know. Better get on that.

What a day though. Man-o-man. I can’t believe it.

Posted by: Ricky Raccoon at October 9, 2009 5:35 AM

Now the whole world has an imaginary friend.

Can't stop giggling! Except to cry.

Posted by: Joan of Argghh! at October 9, 2009 6:08 AM

This...I...They...But....Who....What...Ktwjhumnsefiuiufeh ilhuf i hufds i uhds ihudsoiu fdsopi jds oji hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhlllllllllllllllllllllll

(This post is being completed by an automatic script. Mumblix Grumph has just had an apoplectic fit and is unable to finish)

Posted by: Mumblix Grumph at October 9, 2009 6:12 AM

Well at last they are consistent in their piss-poor choices. The Nobbled Prize indeed!

Look on the bright side, this will sully his reputation more than many miles of conservative blog copy or Glenn Beck's onslaught. Surely what's left of his gullible voter base: those that didn't know about, or simply couldn't believe the evidence of his Leftist roots, will at last catch on? This isn't just an internal US political conspiracy, it's a global one.

Posted by: Frank P at October 9, 2009 6:18 AM

You people don't get it. Since the deadline for nominations was February 2009, this award has nothing to do with his flawed presidency. Rather, it is for the community organizing that made Chicago such a beacon of peace -- similar to what previous recipient Arafat achieved for the Palestinian people.

Posted by: Gagdad Bob at October 9, 2009 6:20 AM

Next time I'll vote for peace.

Posted by: Hannon at October 9, 2009 6:29 AM

Well now. The NPP committee has been put in charge of awarding consolation prizes for the OIC.

Posted by: Joan of Argghh! at October 9, 2009 6:42 AM

Er... IOC. Dyslexia so early in the morning.

Posted by: at October 9, 2009 6:43 AM

I guess they really did it. When I got up and read the news, I thought it was a spoof. As they say, you can't make this stuff up.

Posted by: Fat Man at October 9, 2009 6:47 AM

Is that a Greek column in my pocket, or am I just happy to see me!

Posted by: The O Himself at October 9, 2009 6:56 AM

The Nobel committee has continued down the path of irrelevancy. The committee has made some fairly bad choices for the last decade or so, its anti-America agenda fits in perfectly with Mr. Obama’s. The following is a list of recent Nobel winners.

1994 Yasser Arafat (A terrorist)

2001 Kofi Annan (Anti-American Politician)

2002 Jimmy Carter (Anti American Politician)

2005 Mohamed El Baradei (A fool and a Liar)

2007 Al Gore (A large fool and liar)

2009 Barrack Obama (Anti-American Politician)

This is a collection of Leftist doofuses, unknown bureaucrats, petty dictators, terrorists, conmen, and crooks. What distinguished company, Mister President “No Clue”. The continuing journey to mental retardation is firmly embedded in our society; this is not all that different from giving an Oscar to a pedophile.

Posted by: John at October 9, 2009 7:52 AM

Wait until he presents himself with the Medal of Freedom... And Gerard, a little warning on these pictures, please? I nearly shot hot coffee out of my nose...

Posted by: Rich Nelson at October 9, 2009 8:40 AM

Must be something in the water in Sweden. I wonder, will the messiah give his prize money to acorn?

Posted by: wildman at October 9, 2009 8:59 AM

Oh Lord, it's hard to be humble,
When you're perfect in every way...
I love to look in the mirror,
Cause I get better lookin' each day...
To know me is to love me,
Oh I must be a hell of a man...
Oh Lord, it's hard to be humble,
But I'm doin' the best that I can.

Posted by: Pete Madsen at October 9, 2009 9:03 AM

This is payback. The socialist powers that be are obviously rewarding the ignorance and "racist" guilt of the vote and history-challenged Americans that elected Obama.

Idiot Wind: "From the Grand Coulee Dam to the Capitol" - Dylan

Posted by: Denny at October 9, 2009 9:04 AM

It's all good. Like Governor Reagan said after his meeting with Truman Capote, 'let's just troll that critter around the quadrangle and see what he comes up with'.

Posted by: james wilson at October 9, 2009 9:17 AM

What? Obama?!
Aw, crap. They'll give these out to just anybody.

Posted by: Arafat in hell at October 9, 2009 9:26 AM

Arthurstone: Personally I lprefer (sic) the sound of right-wingers heads exploding.

Hey champ, those are explosions of laughter.

Posted by: Rich Nelson at October 9, 2009 9:49 AM

Arthur, you have no stones, we knew that.

Posted by: james wilson at October 9, 2009 10:03 AM

"Stop evaluating ideas based on their content. Repudiate the notion that anyone from your school of thought can come up with a bad idea, or that someone from the other school of thought can come up with a good one. Team, team, team. Your team is so perfect. That other team is so wrong."

By me. From the fourth step to complete insanity. Arthur, I think, should be ready to start the fifth step any day now; well done, sir.

It really is insanity too. The other team does something that makes your team go "WTF???" and it's proof of your superior intellectual prowess. Your team elicits the exact same reaction from the rest of us...and it's just another victory for you. You win both ways.

In your little snow globe, that is. With all the nice young men in their clean white coats.

Posted by: Morgan K Freeberg at October 9, 2009 11:25 AM


You keep your hopey-changey idol, I'll keep mine.

They're comin' to take you away, ha ha.

Posted by: Morgan K Freeberg at October 9, 2009 12:22 PM


In an attempt to keep my right-wing head from exploding, I've decided to focus my efforts on recalling on all of President Obama's accomplishments.

Somewhat to my surprise, this worked!

Our President's utter lack of substantive achievement, before and after the inauguration, resulted in a vacuum of thought that nicely held my fractured skull together.

On a more serious note, can you provide a list of President Obama's substantive contributions to world peace, things actually ACHIEVED, that would even remotely justify this award? I'm thinking things like TR's resolution of the 1905 Russo-Japanese conflict...

Posted by: BobK at October 9, 2009 12:38 PM

The right detests the tenents of Islam, Art, you didn't notice? It is your boys who are bringing them in under the tent. They also hate Western Civ, also cannot abide liberty, and also feel the need for a single strong caliphate.
This is all indeed the fault of the right. We still are not motivated to police our peculiar diseases which you display in such abundance.

Posted by: james wilson at October 9, 2009 12:45 PM



The pseudo-intellectualism is strong in this one.

Posted by: Rich Nelson at October 9, 2009 1:38 PM

"Wait until he presents himself with the Medal of Freedom...
Posted by: Rich Nelson at October 9, 2009 8:40 AM "

Heck... Just wait until he crowns himself Emperor...

Posted by: newton at October 9, 2009 1:43 PM

Our President's utter lack of substantive achievement, before and after the inauguration, resulted in a vacuum of thought that nicely held my fractured skull together.

++shrug++ There's the beer summit. Don't forget that.

He also killed a fly.

Posted by: Morgan K Freeberg at October 9, 2009 2:25 PM

Is it the theocrats that have you in a tizzy, Astone? Sorry to let you down but principled conservatism does not take refuge in churches. That's not what churches are for, didn't you know?

Those on the left should recognize their rapport with Islam since they exhibit a similarly dire intolerance of those they consider to be the Other-- as your posts amply demonstrate. The liberal penchant for vituperative and profane language, a substitute for actual violence, is in keeping with this bizarre parallel.

Posted by: RR at October 9, 2009 4:54 PM

Just watching the movie.

Posted by: Kimisha at October 9, 2009 6:06 PM

I just don't have the perseverance to listen any more to Artstooge.

I'll simply say that I hope he someday finds himself living eternally with his liberal and relativist comrades.

Can anyone imagine the forever violent and narcissist "struggles" over the latest five-year Pelosi plan?

Say hi to Babs for me.

Posted by: Denny at October 9, 2009 7:21 PM

C'mon folks admit it. The troll's got us all pegged. We're all just jealous of Barack 'cuz he got a Peace Prize. And just wait till those Iranians find out about the Peace Prize. They're going to look mighty silly trying to go up against an American president with a really for real, no messin' around, 100% bona fide Nobel Peace Prize in his outstretched hand. They'll just give up the nukes out of pure shame. Bet on it.


Posted by: jwm at October 9, 2009 7:51 PM

Where the f*** is Perez Hilton when he's needed most? If Miss Priss been on the Nobel committee and asked about Obama's position on gay marriage, there's no f***ing way His Zippitude would have gotten the prize.

Ruminate on that, Arthurstone.

Posted by: MarkJ at October 9, 2009 8:42 PM

This just in: Marshall Applewhite has been announced as the winner of the Nobel Prize for Astronomy (awarded posthumously).

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