February 25, 2010

Dead Sister's Teeth! The "Oh Blow Me" Moment of the Summit So Far

File this Congresswoman under, "I'm from your gummerment and I'm here to humm you...."

Dems to USA: "If the dentures don't fit, you must submit!"

Louise Slaughter just slays us with this whip-out of the crying towel: "You will not believe this and I know you won't, but it's true. Her sister died. This poor woman had no dentures. She wore her dead sister's teeth, which of course were uncomfortable and did not fit."

No! InCONceivable! Just think of it! Something clearly must be done to fill the missile denture gap in America! Otherwise we might gum the economy to death instead of just talking the country into a stupor with Congressional soundgums like Slaughter's.

Jeeze Louise, you're right. We don't believe it. And even if it were true there's two fixes that require less than two trillion dollars. 1) Get this deranged dead-sister's teeth wearing soul on anti-psychotic medication and advanced oral hygiene, STAT! 2) Reform Medicare to provide dentures to those whose sisters have died indenturate.

Posted by Vanderleun at February 25, 2010 10:03 PM
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"It is impossible to speak in such a way that you cannot be misunderstood." -- Karl Popper N.B.: Comments are moderated and may not appear immediately. Comments that exceed the obscenity or stupidity limits will be either edited or expunged.

The slippery slope begins towards indentured servitude.

Posted by: Cameron Wood at February 25, 2010 12:35 PM

Yes, they need to put teeth into this bill!

Posted by: Aquila at February 25, 2010 1:06 PM

We neefa toof czarff!!
Thith ith-an outrayth!!

Posted by: Ricky Raccoon at February 25, 2010 1:11 PM

Just say no to dead sister's teeth, I always thed.

Posted by: Ricky Raccoon at February 25, 2010 1:12 PM

No wonder Jesus described hell as a place where "there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth" (Matthew 13:42).

Posted by: Connecticut Yankee at February 25, 2010 4:52 PM

You guys are all terrible.

(I'm still laughing here)

Posted by: pdwalker at February 25, 2010 8:48 PM

Those are two sick chicks!

The sister for wearing the teeth, and the Congresswoman for relating the story to the world.

Actually I read one poster who wrote "Isn't this an example of great recycling ".

Posted by: JD at February 26, 2010 4:10 AM

There ith a thpethial plathe in Hell for people who make punth like that.

Posted by: WWWebb at February 26, 2010 7:02 AM

Obama's $500 billion-less Medicare 'death panel' wouldn't even stamp this old woman's car parking ticket much less pay for a new set of chops.

Posted by: Shooter1001 at February 26, 2010 9:30 AM

Another laugh: No one -- not even one Dem congressman or woman -- is suggesting that dental care would be covered under Obamacare.

Posted by: James at February 26, 2010 11:08 AM

I wonder if her office offered to contact state and local social services and state and local charities to get this woman some help?

Or would that be a bad question to ask during 'sob-story telling time'?

Posted by: Mikey NTH at February 26, 2010 11:42 AM

All I want from Congreth/Ith my two fwont teef!

Posted by: Aquila at February 26, 2010 1:00 PM

Of course Slaughter, whose estimated 2008 net worth was between $1 Million and $2.3 Million, couldn't be bothered to give the toothless woman a couple hundred bucks to get some new pearlies, assuming this story is true (and it reeks of fakery.) It seems Nancy Pelosi (2008 Net worth between $33 million and $95 million) couldn't find it in her bleeding heart to help out either.

To put it another way, as someone once said, "I've never met a communist who was nice to their maid."

Posted by: Blastineau at February 26, 2010 2:40 PM

Dear Nancy,
can you please spare some toilet paper ?

Posted by: DaveinPhoenix at February 28, 2010 8:02 PM