July 24, 2016

Life in Kalispell: Reportedly, a drunken man shot a firework “out of his butt”


My kind of town: Where the still have a good old-fashioned 4th!

8:05 a.m. A concerned Bigfork resident reported that the neighbor has created some sort of “firework bomb” with several propane tanks. Apparently, he plans to set it off tonight.

8:22 a.m. Someone saw two elderly women drag a bear off of Highway 2 East.

9:42 a.m. A local man reported that his missing iPad notified him that it had made its way to Florida.

9:52 a.m. A Kalispell resident complained that the neighbor man has refused to clean up his firework mess.

1:57 p.m. Spastic boys in a Jeep Wrangler were seen chucking fireworks out the window as they drove down River Road.

2:43 p.m. The owner of a local ranch reported that four foreign men checked in to a room with only two queen beds. He thought this was weird.

2:46 p.m. A Kalispell man reported that the maintenance manager threatened to end his life over excessive water usage.

2:52 p.m. Someone reported that a man wearing fuzzy pajama bottoms was standing between ShopKo and Super 1, looking very “lost.”

7:02 p.m. A report was made about a local “bugler” who was shooting fireworks at “tubers” floating the river near Bigfork. He was told to knock it off.

7:15 p.m. Kids were seen tossing fireworks into the woods along Mountain Meadow Road.

8:48 p.m. A Kalispell resident reported that the fireworks in their neighborhood seem louder than the fireworks in other neighborhoods.

9:42 p.m. Reportedly, a drunken man shot a firework “out of his butt” in the direction of children who were sitting on a dock in Lakeside.

Firework Frenzy - Flathead Beacon

Posted by gerardvanderleun at July 24, 2016 1:34 PM
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"It is impossible to speak in such a way that you cannot be misunderstood." -- Karl Popper N.B.: Comments are moderated and may not appear immediately. Comments that exceed the obscenity or stupidity limits will be either edited or expunged.

And people wonder why we need guns up here.

Posted by: Casey Klahn at July 24, 2016 2:20 PM

Having spent a good portion of my well misspent youth there, I can rightly say the more things don't change, the more they stay the same.

Posted by: Jewel at July 24, 2016 4:05 PM

Visited Kallispell several times 30-40 years ago. Came damn close to retiring to that area. Wish I had.

Posted by: BillH at July 25, 2016 6:45 AM

So what happened to the bear?

Posted by: SteveS at July 26, 2016 1:36 PM

Just moved to Kalispell a couple months ago. Fun place. Can't wait for winter.

Posted by: MarkN at July 26, 2016 8:56 PM

"Someone saw two elderly women drag a bear off of Highway 2 East."

Was the bear already dead?

Posted by: David D at July 27, 2016 11:26 AM