August 27, 2013

Atomic Cadillac


There's these sleazy, crazy mullahs
Want to rearrange our head.
Want to pick our pocket.
Want to slip into our bed.
Well, they better watch their moves,
Cause we're getting in the grooves,
And unless they want real action
They'd better just get back,
Or they'll feel the positraction
Of our Atomic Cadillac.

Chorus:It gets three miles to the gallon.
It's hand-made by General Motors.
It's got a Winchester Repeater,
And seven polychromed rotors.
It's got five-wheel drive in naugahyde.
It cruises below the street.
It's got solid-state steering.
We can drive it with our feet.
It's amphibious, subacqueous,
It's sealed up for outer space.
It's the meanest motor-scooter in the atomic arms race.

Who are these guys who're cracking wise
And showing no respect?
A bunch of jerk-off turkeys
Who're gonna get it in the neck.
They think they'll make us quiver;
Make us stand up and deliver,
But they're rousting the wrong mob
With they're heads stuck in a sack,
Cause we've got a secret weapon
In our Atomic Cadillac.


Ain't no Bashar al-Assad top cat
Gonna tell us where it's at.
His Hezbollahs got all the styles
Of Harlem pimps beat out by miles,
And ‘cause these Arabs got the pump
They try and tell us when to jump,
But when they mess with Uncle Sam,
Man, they'd better start to pack
And take it on the lam,
Cause he's about to cruise them
In our Atomic Cadillac.


So they better watch their act
Or we'll give 'em cause to grieve.
We're holding all the cards
In our hands and up our sleeves.
Next deal they're gonna holler
For their fooling with the dollar,
Cause we're calling, we ain't bluffing.
We're hot for an attack.
We're diving from the sun at dawn
In our Atomic Cadillac!

It gets three miles to the gallon.
It's hand-made by General Motors.
It's got a Winchester Repeater,
And seven polychromed rotors.
It sports the finest camel saddle
Designed by General Rommel,
Rides on sixteen slicks by Goodyear,
Has a solid plastic pommel.
Air-dropped on any desert
It's computer sniffs out crude.
It'll keep the Ayatollahs blushing.
It's pure power in the nude.
It's the acme of technology.
It really sets the pace.
It's the curvy, MIRVy sweetheart
Of the Atomic Arms Race!

Posted by gerardvanderleun at August 27, 2013 10:27 AM
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"It is impossible to speak in such a way that you cannot be misunderstood." -- Karl Popper N.B.: Comments are moderated and may not appear immediately. Comments that exceed the obscenity or stupidity limits will be either edited or expunged.

Meanwhile, in France:

Posted by: Mumblix Grumph at August 27, 2013 12:07 PM

You have just described the M1A1 Main Battle Tank. Indestructible, able to operate on an atomic battlefield, and one bad ass motherfuc...

Posted by: Roger in Republic at August 27, 2013 8:38 PM

ZZ Top oughta sing a song about this bad boy.

Posted by: chasmatic at August 28, 2013 6:06 AM

See Gerry Anderson's 1961 TV Show, "SUPERCAR". Way ahead of it's time! Nothing new under the sun.

Posted by: Jerry at August 28, 2013 8:14 AM