May 19, 2009

Julie Henderson Has Had It with the Sisters

Model Julie Henderson, having felt the stings and arrows of the new, improved "post-racist" America, wants to clear the air:

"I have been spending "special time" with Russell [Simmons] for about 4 months and in that time I have learned some subtle things about some in the black community that have surprised me. Just for the record, I am nobody’s white b*tch, gold digger or fame chaser."

Well, you go girl. I, for one, can see how some might feel slighted by this budding relationship, seeing that Russell Simmons "is the third richest figure in hip hop , having a net-worth estimate of $325 million." But he is also a talented and energetic man and I can see what a young woman, in need of guidance, might find alluring in him.

And indeed, Ms. Henderson does. And has strong feelings about the recent whispered criticism, saying:

"I just wanna say that Russell has been a great "special" friend and I'm sure as sh*t not giving him up cause some in America object to our friendship. I wanna close by saying, what Russell always says, Namaste. (That means the goddess in me recognizes the goddess in you)....Or, b*tch get your own man."

So I guess that's pretty clear. What is a mystery to me is Russell Simmons in this relationship. As an elder statesman of the immense boon to our national culture that is Hip-Hop, I would think he would approach his declining years full of wisdom and insight. Hence, it is a mystery to me exactly what such a distinguished gentleman would see in such a young and impressionable woman.

I have searched the video record on Ms. Henderson's achievements and have only managed to come up with this.

What can possibly be the attraction here? Can someone explain it to me?

Posted by Vanderleun at May 19, 2009 9:22 PM
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"It is impossible to speak in such a way that you cannot be misunderstood." -- Karl Popper N.B.: Comments are moderated and may not appear immediately. Comments that exceed the obscenity or stupidity limits will be either edited or expunged.

I believe the answer to this seemingly inexplicable attraction lies in the great liberal concept of affirmative action. Simmon's label, Phat Farm, has always appealed more to the more deeply colored American population. His relationship with Henderson is a bold, socially responsible effort to reach out to the pigment-challenged. It's just shallow and small of you to suggest it has anything to do with gorgeous young bodies or vast wads of cash.

Pale brothers and sisters, you too can ditch your stuffy Brooks Bros, your dreary Donna Karan, and step out proud and sassy! Do like our new President, get some swaggah in your step and some color in your clothes. An iPod full of hip-hop and a welfare check may have seemed out of reach, but in these hopey-changey days, miracles can happen!

Posted by: askmom at May 20, 2009 6:29 AM

.....lemme see, he has cheerios front and center?
Just askin'
Seinfeld, in BLACK?

Posted by: ac halle at May 20, 2009 6:54 AM

I would say the venerable Mr. Simmons is a
rack man. Heh

Posted by: nbpundit at May 20, 2009 7:02 AM

I'd say Ms. Henderson has a full rack of advantages.

Posted by: MarkH at May 20, 2009 7:57 AM

meh ... straight commercial arrangement:
charms for ka-ching.

Obviously blonde hair and blue eyes do
not a lady make. It's certainly true
that all ladies are women, but the converse
is off the board.

As to your point: Yes, it is culturally sad.

Posted by: Robert at May 20, 2009 1:30 PM

Everybody believes in evolution until it applies to them.

The laws of evolution dictate that women who look like her can do whatever they want, whenever they want.

Suck it up losers, this prime breeding female has rejected every one of you.

Posted by: Fred Z at May 20, 2009 6:05 PM

"Suck it up losers, this prime breeding female has rejected every one of you."

Fred Z at May 20, 2009 6:05 PM

Breeding's about the only thing she's good for. Breed, yes, let her raise my offspring(s), no. Good body, nothing between them ears.

Posted by: Blademonkey at May 20, 2009 6:53 PM

Honestly, I don't get it, either. Why would Simmons want to spend a single moment with this Henderson gal when he could take up with a woman like this?

I mean, really?

Posted by: Donald Sensing at May 20, 2009 7:57 PM

"Good body, nothing between them ears."

1. Those grapes are sour anyway.

2. Prove it. By my standards she's damn smart, using her looks to acquire money, power and fame. What you got to match?

Nope. Losers. Elk with busted antlers and inferior females. If any.

Posted by: Fred Z at May 21, 2009 8:47 AM

Huh. Everyone has their excuse for being a hedonist. I can only guess Henderson's and Fred's.

Posted by: RiverC at May 21, 2009 2:49 PM