March 5, 2006

The Oscar Encores

With the THREE 6 MAFIA scheduled to serenade the clotted cream of our culture tonight at the Oscars with their moving ode that, as one critic delicately described it in the program for tonight's festivities, "... celebrates the innate difficulties of being a member of an eternally oppressed minority entombed within the adamantine walls of our hermetically sealed urban prisons and forced, forced, against his will and all that's holy, to require several females to offer up their bodies to the oppressor for small change, and to return that tainted lucre to him so that his life of oppression may continue for one more day in the plantation that is America (AKA: "You Know It's Hard Our Here for a Pimp")," one wonders exactly what songs THREE 6 MAFIA might be called upon to perform as an encore at the after parties should they win.

Checking the group's impressive catalogue it could be one, or more, or perhaps all of the following masterpieces:

Blow A Nigga's Ass Off
Fuck That Nigga
Fuck Dat Shit
Get Buck Muthafucka (Original)
Long And Hard (Original)
No I'm Not Dat Nigga
Hoes Can Be Like Niggas
From Da Back
Fuck Y'all Hoes
Mafia Niggaz
Weak Azz Bitch
Jealous Ass Bitches
Beatem To Da Floor
Put Cha D. In Her Mouth
Pussy Got Ya Hooked
Slob On My Knob

or the immortal,
Slob On My Knob (Pt. II)
[Because there was so much more to say.]

Given the climate of the Academy today, any one of these might indeed be Oscar material in and of itself. But given the proclivities of the Academy today, my money's on either one of the last two as the songs much in demand wherever our glitterati gather tonight after the show.

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Posted by Vanderleun at March 5, 2006 6:50 AM | TrackBack
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"It is impossible to speak in such a way that you cannot be misunderstood." -- Karl Popper N.B.: Comments are moderated and may not appear immediately. Comments that exceed the obscenity or stupidity limits will be either edited or expunged.

Go on, Gerard, tell us how you REALLY feel...

Posted by: Jim at March 5, 2006 7:35 AM

Okay, I just did. See the item above this one.

Posted by: Van der Leun at March 5, 2006 8:41 AM

What do we know of Classical Greece? Homer's Iliad and Odyssey. Sophocles' Oedipus and Antigone. Euripides' The Trojan Women. Aristophanes' Lysistrata. Aeschylus' The Persians. Herodotus' Histories. Poems by Pindar and Sappho.

And what American "art" does most of the world see? mindless thrillers that glorify crooks and demonize American, smarmy comedies, and utterly filthy pop music produced by human refuse such as you cite.

Posted by: pst314 at March 5, 2006 6:07 PM

Y'know, if we just made this stuff up and printed it, we would be the most racist carbon-based life forms with opposable thumbs in the world. However, you're just printing the facts.

WTF? I mean really, WTF?? Imagine you're some Atticus Finch type that's trying to deal with some JB Stoner type, and Stoner pulls a time machine out of his keister and flips Atticus forward to these guys making one more run through "Fuck that Shit".

I mean, what's a cracker with a good heart supposed to do? I guess it's just all my own damn fault...

Posted by: mezzrow at March 5, 2006 6:13 PM

Any guesses as to the real reason why devout Muslim fundamentalists hate America? When we're spewing this kind of shit all over the world through a firehose?

Of course, I don't imagine the Hollywood left and other entertainment industry types have considered that possibility.

Yes, I know, free speech is a right. Still, I don't seem to recall this rabid anti-Americanism in the Muslim world when our cultural icons were John Wayne, Jimmy Stewart and Frank Sinatra.

Posted by: rickl at March 6, 2006 4:40 PM

Notwithstanding the harm to our reputation that such filth does, you are mistaken about Muslim attitudes towards the West. For instance, check out the career of Sayyed Qtub, who conceived a genocidal hatred for America during the height of the John Wayne era. Historian Bernard Lewis notes Muslim travellers 6 or 7 hundred years ago reporting with disgust at the immorality of Europeans who actually allowed their women to go out in public, socialize, and freely express their own opinions.

Middle Eastern Muslims were murdering Jews long before Jews had the power to adequately defend themselves, much less had their own state. Why? Not because the Jews were walking around in bikinis and fornicating in the streets, but because they were educated, hard-working, prosperous, and NOT SUBMISSIVE TO MUSLIMS. The were, to make a deliberate reference to white supremacist history, "uppity infidels" who "did not know their place." No wonder people like David Duke find such a warm welcome in the Middle East.

Posted by: pst314 at March 7, 2006 10:05 AM


You're absolutely right. I've read a passage by Qutb where he recoiled in horror at men and women dancing at a church social. In the 1950's.

"Not submissive to Muslims". Yes, that's reason enough for them to hate us.

Still, it seems to me that American popular culture has been in a precipitous decline for the last 20 years or so. Some would say 40 years... but at least the 60's had some good music.

Posted by: rickl at March 7, 2006 7:10 PM

rickl, I won't argue that culture has been in a decline. I'm not sure how precipitous it is, since lots of people ignore much of pop culture, but it's not a pretty sight. On the bright side, I have read that teens are now showing signs of becoming more conservative in their values than the baby boomers. That's not something I know much about, but I'm hopeful.

In the meantime, we can boycott the garbage, and if we are fortunate enough to actually meet someone from Hollywood or the music industry, we can rudely take them to task.

By the way, have you heard of John (National Review) Derbyshire's t-shirt "pop culture is filth"? Heh.

Posted by: pst314 at March 7, 2006 8:48 PM

......and then "the people's" air waves were used to watch enough money spent on clothes to re-build the gulf coast. Thank god, '06 is my year to drop 'PC' out the window at 60 MPH. No, hell, make it 75 MPH+.

IN clearer english: the red carpet scene has no bearing on any thing. We need all get our own brains back and use them for a great change...

Posted by: Hanpi at March 8, 2006 12:07 AM

THREE 6 MAFIA: one oscar, Martin Scorcese: zero

Posted by: Oded at March 9, 2006 4:19 PM
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