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Mexican Standoff Solved

Aesop’s solution to the Mexican Standoff at Raconteur Report: For John Wilder works for me.

Saturday, we explain the facts of life to Mexico: 1 bbl. of crude for every illegal found here, per year. We’ll be generous, and start the levy at 40M in Year One.

They also cede Baja California to our designated territorial governor’s rule for the next 199 years. It’s still part of Mexico, but it now runs under U.S. law. The U.S. agrees to assume military defense responsibility for it. It becomes bilingual. Any felons found therein are exiled from Baja for life either to Mexican prison or for execution.

The Western half of the peninsula is developed as the longest luxury Riviera on the planet and puts Monaco and Vegas into permanent second-class status. The employment is 100% Mexican nationals, earning market wages.

The eastern side of the peninsula, and the waters contiguous becomes the longest nature preserve in the world, and a mecca for divers, whale watchers, and general tree huggers the world over. All profits from both accrue 50-50 to each country.

The U.S. profits build a wall from Tijuana to Brownsville and fund the Coast Guard and Border Patrol.

We end birthright US citizenship, including retroactively, and anyone found in the U.S. illegally after 90 days from that date is banned from immigrating here for life. After working for five years on a chain gang, building the wall.

The line of cars headed south is 1000 miles long within a week, mainly to apply for jobs building and working at the resorts going up from Tijuana to Cabo San Lucas.

Comments on this entry are closed.

  • Nori November 21, 2019, 8:19 PM

    Kill it all,via slow but inexorable strangulation.

    RTWT. Always worth the time.

  • Matt November 22, 2019, 7:48 AM

    EXCELLENT idea. Also we need to lease the eastern end of Siberia from the Russkis, share the profits from resource extraction, and offer good jobs to all the freedom-loving Eastern Europeans who want one. Ten-year terms. American history and civics classes included. Top graduates qualify for American citizenship.

  • OneGuy November 22, 2019, 8:03 AM

    The crazy thing is this would work and would be hugely beneficial to both countries. It won’t happen of course because government is NOT in the business of solving problems. Government is in the business of using problems to get what they want (and that includes getting rich).

  • Skorpion November 22, 2019, 11:50 AM

    I’ve always seen Baja California as a poorer, drier, less-populated extension of the American State. Personally I think the Golden State should separate from the USA, annex its lower Mexican quarter, and form a new, bilingual republic with developments similar to the ones mentioned here.

  • nah November 22, 2019, 12:26 PM


    Start by unilateral withdrawal from NAFTA, which has been disastrous for working-class Americans since the beginning. Ban the importation of manufactured goods from outside the G8 Nations, and put a 250% protective tariff on manufactured goods that are imported from those countries–this is the new “Most Favored Nation” trade status.

    Declare California, New York, Massachusetts, New Jersey, and Illinois to be in rebellion against the United States, arrest their politicians and try them for treason, and return them to the status of “territory” for the next century, while appointed Governor-Generals root out the invaders and the corruption.

    Bring US troops home from foreign soil the world around and put half of them on the Mexican border, with orders to shoot on sight and shoot to kill, and give cash bonuses for confirmed kills. The other half of the Army can occupy those five treasonous Sanctuary States, and rotate through assisting ICE in house-to-house searches in all urban areas and all border states.

    Lastly, and I must credit Michelle Malkin for this idea: ICE will set up a toll-free number to take anonymous reports on businesses that hire illegal aliens. Any business that is found to employ even one illegal alien will be seized under RICO and the corporate officers and managers will be tried for treason. When the business’s assets are auctioned off to the highest bidder, the proceeds are split 50-50 with the informant.

    When these things are done, we’ll be in a position to do something about the other half of the Great Replacement, starting with permanent surgical sterilization of recipient and all children as a condition of signing up for EBT, permanent surgical sterilization of all children found to have an IQ of 90 or below, permanent surgical sterilization of all convicted felons, and striking all EBT recipients, morons, and felons from all voter rolls for life.

    The time when it would have been possible to make this particular omelet–by which I mean, preserve some tiny tattered remnant of civilization on this continent “for ourselves and our posterity”–without breaking eggs was a century ago. This plan will limit the collateral damage as much as is possible. And what we will eventually see is going to be far, far worse than this.

  • ghostsniper November 22, 2019, 2:58 PM

    “…permanent surgical sterilization of all convicted felons…”

    I know someone that got busted for a lb of reefer and did 5 years in Raiford.
    He’s a felon because this criminal gov’t says so, not because he harmed anyone.
    Careful with that big assed paint brush.

    One last thing. Leave me out of all situations that include the word “we”.

  • Ga Gator November 22, 2019, 5:35 PM

    Sounds like the sequel to “Mein Kampf”, Uncle Adolph being
    the consummate cultural conservative.

  • captflee November 22, 2019, 6:10 PM

    How much seems to have gone bad in the past 56 years since that awful day in Dallas…

  • ghostsniper November 22, 2019, 6:58 PM

    “How much seems to have gone bad in the past 56 years since that awful day in Dallas…”

    Just try to imagine how bad it’d be if those gov’t agents had missed.

  • Ron Robertson November 24, 2019, 9:47 PM

    Thank you Gerard, not perfect but it is a Plan.
    I live in Melbourne Australia but I can see honest Mexican people buying this idea.
    On reflection, a genuine possibility.
    Uncle Ron.