I don’t know about anybody else but I am waiting for the day when I can hear Donald Trump say, “Today I settled all family business so don’t tell me that you’re innocent. Admit what you did.” And I hope to see about fifteen one-way helicopters warming up in the parking lot. The Resurrection of Jeff Sessions
Every once in a while a little ray of light will hit Bill Maher’s brain. It’s always brief and fleeting. As rare as it may be, it does occasionally happen.
“No wonder fake news resonates so much with Trump fans, because so much of it is fake. It’s just nonsense meant to keep you perpetually offended with an endless stream of controversies that aren’t controversial, and outrages that aren’t outrageous because places like the Huffington Post and Buzzfeed and Salon make their money by how many clicks they get. Yes, the people who see themselves as morally superior are are actually ignoring their sacred job of informing citizens of what’s important, and instead sowing division for their own selfish ends. Hey, wait, isn’t that what Russia was doing to us? Yeah, it is. And we have to stop both of them from using us as the cocks in their cock fights……” Diogenes’ Middle Finger: Bill Maher Reminds Leftist Their Media Are Liars and BS Artist
Ugly Dishes That Taste Delicious – Get our Turkey Mulligatawny Soup recipe…. Ur… ah… no.
Pop Goes the Higher Ed Bubble! | Rotten Chestnuts They’re the ones who spent all of freshman year teaching the blue-haired nose-ringers how to dye their hair blue and pierce their septums. Depression? They,re already maxed to the max on Prozac. All that,s left is acceptance ….and finding another job. Get ready for the Great Ivory Tower Cat Lady Exodus. I,m penciling it in for 2021.
Dear NAACP piece of shit: I Don’t Need To Be Preached To About Guns By A Member of the Most Violent Segment of Society
Your nose isn’t really as big as it looks in selfies – Last year, more than half of plastic surgeons were approached by patients who wanted to look better in selfies,
“Roll up the wall bed, mama. I’m riding the range tonight!” Richard Dawkins Muses on Eating Human Meat, Cannibalism Taboo |
Living poor — at skyhigh rates — has become like a fashion trend. “In 2016, BuzzFeed published an article … on the ‘tiny house’ phenomenon â a vogue for … a tremendous number of tedious affectations … design fetishism, ostentatious minimalism, costly self-abnegation. … [including] two other lifestyle trends: ‘raw water’ (unfiltered drinking water, often collected from the natural environment) and â#vanlifeâ (living in a van, but on Instagram).” “Costly self-abnegation”
File Under “It’s not easy being an obsessive-compulsive homosexual:”Oral sex: HPV is causing an oral cancer epidemic in men
Or an obsessive compulsive bureaucrat in DC who is frightened by other rats. CFPB Headquarters is Infested by Rats
The Hollywood Reporter ‘Triumph Of The Beta Male’ Cover Is A Bad Sign The cast of HBO’s “Silicon Valley” stand in a line, hands in one another’s pockets, with a meek expression that says: “You don’t have to worry about me getting you pregnant, because my sperm count is so low! Not that you would sleep with me anyway, because my handshake is so weak it would send you running in the other direction.”
San Fran Nan Goes Drag Racing “This idea of people believing in themselves, being themselves, taking pride in themselves, is not just a lesson for politicians but for everyone in the country.” I guess the crazy moonbat had one of her famous brain farts and just didn’t realize that authenticity she was talking about is MEN PRETENDING TO BE WOMEN. Earth to Nancy!
Congratulations to Kristian Saucier, a man who has served proudly in the Navy, on your newly found Freedom. Now you can go out and have the life you deserve!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) March 10, 2018