It’s a toss-up but, unlike being burned to a radioactive crisp, you can still entertain yourself in the rubble by masking and social distancing in the ruins of western civilization.
This is the “guidance” from the career assholes at Homeland Security who seem content to sit in a non-dispersing cloud of their own flatulence forever. (But six feet apart, natch.)
In event of nuclear war, US government agency reminds to socially distance and to wear a mask Americans have been instructed by the country’s emergency management agency to maintain social distancing and to wear a mask if sheltering with members from outside of their household in the case of a nuclear explosion.
In instructions provided by Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA), an agency of the U.S. Department of Homeland Security, which were last updated on Friday, Americans should have already familiarized themselves with potential refuge points near to their homes, their place of work or indeed during their commute, and are encouraged to “prepare NOW” by creating an “Emergency Supply Kit” with supplies “for three or more days.”
So, kids, should you see that gigantic earthside flash of a nuke shimmering on the horizon, where should you get to?
Here are some more things that you never ever knew about nukes if you happen to be a member of Homeland Security or FEMA that lives in a part of an American city teeming with folks of room temperature IQs or less. Emphasis added where my jaw dropped at the mind-numbing stupidity being demonstrated by the act of writing these “helpful hints.”
Nuclear Explosion | Ready.gov: Nuclear explosions can cause significant damage and casualties from blast, heat, and radiation but you can keep your family safe by knowing what to do and being prepared if it occurs.
A nuclear weapon is a device that uses a nuclear reaction to create an explosion (aka “Boom!”).
Nuclear devices range from a small portable device carried by an individual to a weapon carried by a missile.
A nuclear explosion may occur with or without a few minutes warning. [3 minutes or 30 minutes, but who’s counting?]
If [after a nuclear attack on your city or nation ] you are experiencing a medical emergency, call 9-1-1 [If there happens to be a telephone network fucktioning.] and let the operator know if you have, or think you might have, COVID-19 [aka the ChiComs’ Bioweapon and 911 if it survives will not be screening for a cough.]. If you can, put on a mask before help arrives. [Yes be nice to the “arrving help” because it will be with you and your “covid emergency” in three years.]
Continue to practice social distancing by wearing a mask and by keeping a distance of at least six feet between yourself and people who not part of your household [ aka The cooties carriers!].