BECAUSE now more than ever.
(Just where are all those iconic anti-war demonstrations from, well, just about everywhere over the last 60 years? Nowhere. Nowhere at all. They were all just a smile, a giggle, and then to be memory-holed by the enemies among us.)
Speaking just for myself my off-line notebook says:
(May 2, 2002) I see the dead, the “destroyed,” on both sides, the young soldiers on both sides with all their unlived years stolen by atomizing weapons sent by ghost fingers from armed and targeting robots lurking in the sky.
I find I don’t care at all anymore who “started it”…. Or why it started …. Or this provocation or that insult …. Or whether war by patriot or war by proxy or war by sending in endless ammunition and beta-tested weapons systems to see how well they kill in the mud, in the blood, in the red mist, in the red rains …. All of it …. ALL OF IT — ALL OF THEM … I hate and despise all of the Golems in Kyiv, in DC, in London, in China, in Moscow… All of them, all the masters of war. I don’t know about others but I ain’t marching anymore.
I was conceived in war and born in peace. In my life, there has been the war during which I was conceived and that took the young man I am named after. Then there was the Korean War in which my uncle fought. Then there was the Vietnam war that came for me and which I dodged to my lasting shame. Then what? Falklands? Grenada? Others that have slipped away into the smoke of the war world? Then the wars of 911 and their endless debacle. And now what is presented to me as my choice? PUTIN OR PUTZ? That? That’s my CHOICE? My hope?
I decline the gambit.
I find can’t take “sides” anymore; no, not ever. No more lining up in my “Team USA Jersey” to root for or against some system whose bitter fruits are young men made into a red mist and shredded gobbets of flesh, done by air or sniper, by artillery, or by drone, or with drone or under drone or done in …. Done in by a drone; some sexless bee weapon wielded by some unseen queen?
I see now that I at last, at long, long last, stand outside all these trumped-up causes, these deadly and eternal failures. Today I stand to see and be repulsed but still made so ripe with despair that I have been (through the unremittingly rained bullshit of causes) made ready, primed –once more once more — to “choose sides” ….
And so the whole cycle begins again and again and again… The snake that consumes its own tail. There. Out there where I can almost see it. Out there where Oruorborus circles the place where some demon will take control of some man and make him hatch the sun on the surface of the Earth. And what then? What then?
I find my thoughts, like thoughts of youth, grow long.