The Top 40

Anthony Weiner, in his latest effort to ice down, returned to playing goalie in the Chelsea Piers Adult League. His team, the Falcons, lost 5-2 to the Hellfish as Weiner let four shots penetrate the net despite his vain efforts to erect a barrier. The sorely-pressed candidate for mayor let a teammate push a reporter out of the way after the game when she tried to ask Weiner questions.

Weiner never took his helmet off during the game, preferring to remain anonymous. One Hellfish player noted, “He’s not that good a goalie.” Some players who have competed against him in the past said Weiner used to throw tantrums, but he has mellowed since his sexting scandal. One said, “He’s a totally different guy. He doesn’t get angry anymore. He used to lose his temper.”

Weiner agreed: “I am clearly a less chippy player. Mostly because I’m getting old. I’m too busy trying to get pucks to hit me to worry about hitting anyone else.”

Notice he didn’t say “hitting on.”