« "Spoiler alert! Living in San Francisco with her gay male BFF blogging the existential ennui of being unmarried was my tip-off." | Main | Even a Nun Might Say, "Jesus Christ it's cold in Europe!" »

February 5, 2012

And the Sammy Hager Award Goes to McCain for "You Idiots, Get Out of My Way!"

“Slow traffic keep right” is such a simple rule to understand,
but evidently they’re issuing drivers licenses to people too stupid to understand that rule, who are probably also too stupid to figure out that passing a semi-truck might require use of the accelerator pedal. (Trust me, idiot: It’s down there on the floorboard of your car, probably somewhere on the right side.) If there were any justice in the world, state troopers wouldn’t be laying radar traps for guys doing 82 mph in a 65 mph zone, but would instead be issuing tickets to slow-moving idiots who take more than a few seconds to pass a semi-truck. -- Hate Hoax Busted by Cop’s Dash-Cam (Also: You Idiots, Get Out of My Way!) : The Other McCain

Posted by gerardvanderleun at February 5, 2012 10:22 AM. This is an entry on the sideblog of American Digest: Check it out.

Your Say

I had a rancher friend who drove a super-charged GMC dualie with bull bars...he'd sit on a lane slug for a bit, flip the halogen a couple of times and then he'd lightly "tap" them with the bull bars. Moved them right over it did.

Posted by: BJM at February 5, 2012 12:21 PM

Oh, Lord God, you touched on one of my driving peeves. Here are some:

(1) If you are going to pass, then pass. Accelerate.
(2) If you are going to make a left turn across traffic - go, do not hesitate, go.
(3) Pulling out into traffic when there are no cars behind me and a clear lane - go to that lane, not directly in front of me.
(4) When entering a freeway, and there is an acceleration lane (note what it is called?) use that to come up to highway speed - do not come up to highway speed from 45 mph on the actual highway.
(5) Turn signals are your friend and mine. Be my friend.
(6) The mirrors can be used for more than putting on make-up. No - really.
(7) Spending a few minutes to sweep the snow off of your car and every other window than the windshield is time well-spent.
(8) Four wheel drive does not grant you magical turning and braking power. If you don't believe me, try it out some time in an empty parking lot.
(9) Those "pretty lights" strung over intersections are more than decorative.
(10) Yes, the people who time lights, design intersections, and build freeway ramps are sadistic bastards. They are also working within budget, geographical, engineering and other limitations so they can hide their sadistic bastardness. Acknowledge the world as it is and plan your driving according to that reality, not the gum-drop world you wish it was. That three-car pile-up you just caused is now causing a lot of people to think homicidal thoughts about you - not the engineers. Why are you letting those sadistic bastards get away with it by making others blame you?

Drive smart - the other guy may think the town is under alien invasion and trying to shoot his way out in his Taurus.* Don't encourage him to think you are an alien.

*True story. Blew out the back driver's side window on my old Escort back in 2006. Last time i"ll go for milk at 11:00 p.m. on my way home from the parents'.

Posted by: Mikey NTH at February 5, 2012 6:19 PM

Post a comment




Remember Me?

(you may use HTML tags for style)