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March 2, 2011

Low Flow Acts of Congress

Shitty City: Scat Lovers Ecstatic in Frisco!Low Flow Toilets Equals No-Flow Sewers In San Francisco
Indeed, it was learned that it would even be possible, by purely mechanical means, of removing acts of Congress from toilets and shoving them into the sewage system using almost no water whatsoever! What a boon for the environment! Alas, this dream merely proved that activists could only see as far as the bottom of their bowls. The Doctrine of Unintended Consequences struck with force when it was discovered that the water which relocated the acts of Congress from toilets was also necessary to shift the Congressional output through the sewer system! Who knew! Instead of a laminar movement of muck found with the old toilets, low-flow toilets caused stagnation. The acts of Congress left the homes of the benevolent, but when they plopped dry into the sewer, there they sat, festering and bubbling and turning into a giant petri dish. And they stank.

Posted by Vanderleun at March 2, 2011 9:06 AM. This is an entry on the sideblog of American Digest: Check it out.

Your Say

"And God saw what he had done, and behold, it was good."*

*see also: global warming/cooling

Posted by: Do you believe yet? at March 2, 2011 10:52 AM

Sounds like a shovel-ready job for hard-working unionized pooper scoopers! But considering it is San Francisco, liberal logic would apply and calls for a complete reengineering of the system by overpaid unionized public employees at the private sector's and tax-payers' expense. Or residents could just burn matches all day, assuming there aren't large amounts of methane build-up. Oh boy...

Posted by: RedCarolina at March 2, 2011 8:45 PM

Irony

Posted by: Casca at March 3, 2011 5:22 AM

Do not even TRY to tell me you didn't see this coming. I will NOT believe you.

M

Posted by: Mark Alger at March 3, 2011 6:45 AM

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