The Top 40

Can someone please inform me why most First Ladies see the need to waste their time on useless causes?

And not just any kale - kale from your local trendy farmers market. She's The Poor Man's Martha Stewart. Her prop Victory Garden turned out to be toxic, she drove an entourage to the DC farmers market and now she's everywhere telling everyone what to eat! No worries, Michelle.. the cost of food is so high obesity will take care of itself. Take away our cheap fast food so each of us can be a lean, mean campaigning machine JUST LIKE YOU. She's historic. Just like her manchild husband.

Not only will obesity be a thing of the past because of the high cost of food, but we will be walking around nude with svelte bodies sleeping under bridges because all necessities will be unaffordable. Something to look forward to.

With Lean comes Mean, which is how Americans will feel if denied or curtailed their comfort food.

Cilla: I think Eleanor Roosevelt started it. She always had some cause or other to show that she was important, and not just sitting in the White House twiddling her thumbs.

Likewise "The First Hundred Days". That was from FDR's first term, when he enacted all sorts of policies to fight the Depression. Now the media constantly talks about what each new president will do in his First Hundred Days.

Palin nailed it in speaking on Long Island. We'll be forced to breast-feed our children because milk will be unaffordable.