The 9 Plagues of Western Snivilization @ AMERICAN DIGEST

October 12, 2008

The 9 Plagues of Western Snivilization

In annotated outline:

1960s: The Population Bomb. Too many people yields global famines and cannibalism. [Long pig -- the other white meat -- still not on any local restaurant's menu, except for that movie joint serving Fried Green Tomatoes.]
1970s: No oil by 2000. [Still pumping and there's more wherever we look.]
1970s: The new Ice Age. Just when the oil wells ran dry, the glaciers would begin.... [Good thing the polar bears will thrive. We'll need the fur coats.]
1980s: AIDS. You're all going to die, YES YOU.... [Who me? Even if I don't share needles and body slam 15 guys a night at the bath houses which will never ever close? YES YOU-- and give us a lot of money too.]
1990s: BSE. Eat beef? You're going to end up a drooling victim of Mad Cow Disease. [Better that than a member of Daily Kos. Saner and healthier as well. Bring on the rib-eye and let's get this over with.]
1990s-present: Global Warming. Well, the Ice Age didn't emerge. [Good thing the polar bears are still thriving. We can feed the Eco-Nazi's to them.]
2000s: Terrorism. We're facing a 9/11 every week from bombers who plan to destroy planes with weapons hidden in shampoo bottles. [Not if we adopt the secret TSA master plan and all fly naked with a box of sanitary wipes for the seats.]
2000s: Bird Flu. [If the Chicken Blood Drinking Decathlon at the 2008 Beijing Olympics didn't spread this around the world nothing will.]
2008: The credit crunch. Recession, depression or financial apocalypse? [I'm going long on canned goods and ammo. Especially Dinty Moore Polar Bear Stew. Hey, you gotta cut somewhere.]

Posted by Vanderleun at October 12, 2008 10:28 AM

If they socialize the banking industry, it won't even take an Obama win to put us into genuine Grapes Of Wrath depression.

Anybody with capital will pull what they've got in cash right out of the system.

We could see a devaluation of the dollar by spring. Why spring? Because that's when farm loans happen.

Nobody is going to be buying cars or refrigerators or flatscreens much longer. But people need to eat, and even though the babysitters may go after banks, I don't think they are quite ready for collectivization yet. Too many people still have private farms.

And guns.

But banks? They'll go after banks. And all those consumer goods that won't get bought? It may sting the retail clerks at Best Buy or the packers at Amazon... but Americans don't make shit any more. Except for cars and airplanes, and it looks like we may cut the "makes cars" column by one or two before Christmas.

It's going to end in a hell of a war; right about the time the progs have stamped the last vestiges of love of God and Country right out of our popular culture, too.

Posted by: TmjUtah at October 12, 2008 8:42 PM

Mr. Wilson, what happened to Y2K is that something was done to prevent the problems before they happened.

There may be a moral here, concerning AGW and peak oil. There is no doubt that the amount of oil in the ground is finite, and that CO2 and methane are greenhouse gases, and that at some point increasing levels of both gases will lead to irreversible climate change that will be anything but beneficial to Homo sapiens. The real questions are how much oil there is, and where that level of greenhouse gases is.

I would rather find out before the oil does eventually run out, and before the climate takes a (probably sudden) lurch towards conditions not seen since the Carboniferous Era - if then.

Americans, especially the ones on this site, appear to think differently. Never mind, carry on driving your gas-guzzlers - until the Category Sixes sweep them out to sea, if you're coastal.

Yes, I know there is no such thing as a Category Six. Yet.

Posted by: Fletcher Christian at October 13, 2008 12:10 AM

Organizations that took Y2K seriously and devoted significant resources to prevent problems, saw almost no problems. Organizations that sneered at Y2K and put little or no resources into it, saw almost no problems. I am not aware of any organizations that actively attempted to commit suicide by Y2K, but we have to assume they saw almost no problems.

Posted by: Bob Hawkins at October 13, 2008 1:04 PM

Catseye, that's another one that had something done about it before it got too bad. Someone, sooner or later, is going to mention the ozone hole; and that is yet another.

I sense a pattern here; does anyone else?

Posted by: Fletcher Christian at October 13, 2008 2:26 PM

These apply to just the US, but what about:

1. Explicit lyrics in rock-n-roll? Tipper Gore had her panties in a twist about that one...
2. Flag burning? We needed a constitutional amendment, and right quick - until we didn't...
3. Saturated fat? Cripes, we better start eating unsaturated fat right away and throw away the butter - right up to the point where we decided that trans-fats were the enemy and we better start eating butter again...
4. Nuk-u-lar power? 1970s, Three Mile Island, Jane Fonda in the China Syndrome...
5. Power lines causing cancer? All that electricity and magnetic fields - gotta be bad for you!

Posted by: orthodoc at October 13, 2008 4:45 PM

I've been a TmjUtah fan for a while but I want to urge him to pull back on the "Americans don't make shit anymore" line: Americans make all kinds of stuff from toothpaste tube caps to jet engines. Sit down with a ten pound catalogue of American manufacturing...there's a reason we're an 11 trillion dollar economy (give or take a trillion)...

I spent 10 years in and out of every manufacturing plant in Washington state...observing up close the concentration, precision, the safety, the planning - the mental poise that manufacturing - big or small - requires moved me - and channeled a lot of my thinking into what I suppose you'd call the conservative camp.

The left prefers striking Lenin-like, lookin- Into-the-Future poses to getting bogged down in the minutia and precision necessary for excellence in something like manufacturing. That's why you see Obama in those photo ops - touring factories in safety goggles or hard hat looking bewildered, totally disoriented. To a leftist, reality is inflatable rhetoric and grand postures. Toothpaste tube caps and jet engines come into being by squaring your shoulders, lifting your chin and staring boldly into the future...

Posted by: doug at October 13, 2008 5:06 PM

Fletcher Christian is an excellent handle.
Work the retards into a mutiny, and take them to an island where they can make little inbred retards.

Irreversible climate changes have been happening with regularity for 2.5 million years.
We have the great good fortune to be in the small window between ice-ages, and you are facing the wrong direction.
The reason they were irreversible is that man was not here to reverse them, not the other way around. We don't like nature. It's lethal.
There is no doubt that hydrocarbons are in unlimited supply both in the earth and the universe. It's just not likely to ooze into your water supply anymore. Too bad.
Increased levels of CO2 occur 800 years after significant warmings.
All warmings in history are associated with significant human benefits, all coolings with disasters.
When we humans go to warm the earth, it's not going to be with CO2. Waste of effort. That's your job.
You could be 0 for 100 without trying, like Karl.
That's a method, not an accident.

Posted by: james wilson at October 13, 2008 9:06 PM

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October 12, 2008

The 9 Plagues of Western Snivilization

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