May 19, 2004

A Pitiful and Weak Nation Yearns for Peace

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DEPARTMENT OF CREEPING MALE OBSOLESENCE: Welcome to Lids Off

Now you can take the hassle of opening jars out of your hands with the all-new Black & DeckerŪ Lids Off Automatic Jar Opener! It's the easy new way to open jars fast!

With the touch of a button, the new Lids Off Automatic Jar Opener loosens lids in seconds. No more hitting. No more prying. Opening jars doesn't get any easier.

Phantic despairs that "They're strapping belts of Semtex around their waists, and we're spending 40 bucks on a device to uncap jars. "

If this wasn't the perfect gift for a newly married lesbian couple, we'd agree.

Posted by Vanderleun at May 19, 2004 2:20 PM
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Comments:

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"It is impossible to speak in such a way that you cannot be misunderstood." -- Karl Popper N.B.: Comments are moderated and may not appear immediately. Comments that exceed the obscenity or stupidity limits will be either edited or expunged.

Ah, homophopbia--a nice addition to your bag of hatreds.

Posted by: Nigel at May 19, 2004 2:35 PM

A swing and a miss.

Posted by: FH at May 19, 2004 4:21 PM

Nigel, you need lightening. Get a light.

Posted by: Gerard Van der Leun at May 19, 2004 4:36 PM

I love the device to shell a boiled egg. I mean, c'mon, how hard is THAT?

Posted by: cj at May 20, 2004 8:23 PM