March 17, 2009

New Solution to Global Warming: Kill Your Children

evilchild.jpgWe regretfully announce the arrival of 8,000 tons of CO2, via
Allison Elizabeth
May 15, 2000
6 pounds, 12 ounces
Kay, Chris and Will Calloway

If you doubt that the Global Warming Cult is warming itself up to "crimes against humanity" consider the latest 'original contribution to knowledge' from a barren intellectual:

Paul Murtaugh, a statistician at Corvallis' Oregon State University, claims that our carbon legacy isn't just limited to our own emissions, but 50% of our children's (The other parent gets the other 50%). And 25% of their children's, and so on, and so on. He arrived at this estimate using math. -- Mad Science: Your Child Causes Global Warming
He arrived at this estimate using math. Science at its best. The spirit of "Watch Mr. Wizard" personified.

Seems to me the responsible thing to do now is to 1) not have children and, 2) if you have had some, kill them. Grandchildren too. You do want to save the planet, don't you?

This grant-grubbing 'perfesser' has come a long way from his stunningly ignored papers such as Selective predation by Neomysis mercedis [Opossum Shrimp] in Lake Washington from 1981. His more recent effort in 2003,

On detecting hump-shaped relationships in ecology was also cast onto the waters of oblivion. A shame really since the world missed out on observations such as this:

"We tested whether patterns of species density are controlled not only by variations in community biomass but also by variations in environmental conditions, which may be related or unrelated to community biomass."
Not exactly Darwinesque, but what is these days?

Murtaugh's much more cynical current work in stealth eugenics obviously represents his attempt to drink deeply from the trough of climate change slop. I'd say it's working for him since proposing to limit human beings "for the greater good" always gets even the mentally and spiritually barren a share of attention.

The paper [ Reproduction and the carbon legacies of individuals ] seems to be the kind of dull diddle corn pone intellectuals squeeze out these days. But Murtaugh is the kind of diddling academic that gives even fiddling academics a bad name. Murtaugh's "academic web page" lists his interests as "Kayaking, birding, cross-country skiing, cats." That seems about par for the course, doesn't it?

As this item was being written, a Swiftian satire was published at Pajamas Media titled: A Modest Proposal to Prevent the Pernicious Warming of our Fair Globe it calls for:

To wit; that it be enacted as the cornerstone of the necessary reform of our health care system, that, prior to engaging in any action that might potentially extend a human life, that a doctor, nurse, or other medical professional simply be required to file an environmental impact statement in which the carbon emission consequences of said life-extension are clearly set forth and arrayed against any environmental benefits that might ensue from the preservation of the individual in question.
I imagine that we would now have to put any human activity that involves conception, pregnancy, and birth into that category. It would suit Murtaugh since he doesn't seem to have any plans that involve children. Too bad his parents didn't feel the same way. I guess they didn't use math.

An editorial about this paper can be seen @ Your "Carbon Legacy"

Posted by Vanderleun at March 17, 2009 7:16 PM
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"It is impossible to speak in such a way that you cannot be misunderstood." -- Karl Popper N.B.: Comments are moderated and may not appear immediately. Comments that exceed the obscenity or stupidity limits will be either edited or expunged.

Such a delightfully benevolent (and apparently childless) narcissist!

Posted by: Eman at March 18, 2009 4:37 AM

We've got to be united to save earth! Earth Hour is practiced at large scale in all developed and developing countries but there has been more publicity and awareness this year, as well as participation from large corporations like which is a good sign - that there is still hope and that people still care!

Let's all do this, no matter where you are! Saturday, 28 March 2009. Lights off from 8.30pm to 9.30pm!

Posted by: carefornature at March 18, 2009 6:19 AM

The good Doctor was obviously born before 1973.

Posted by: St. Thor at March 18, 2009 6:37 AM

This stuff is a perverted (how do you pervert something that is already perverted?) sequel to the pre WWII Progressive Era belief in the need for state action to prevent the degeneration of the "superior" race from the "over breeding" of the weak and inferior "races" and mentally and physically "unfit." Now, of course, the the "superior race" is the natural flora and fauna and the "inferior race" is the human race. That anybody publishes and disseminates this intellectual landfill is an alarming demonstration of how corrupted "science" has become. But, once a Progressive, always a Progressive.

Posted by: boqueronman at March 18, 2009 8:35 AM

I notice his blog is a microsoft free zone. The guy seems free of a lot of things. Like wisdom. But I'm sure he's happy with teh prez, now that Bush is out of office. Taking any bets on whether he shows up here to enlighten us rubes?


Posted by: jwm at March 18, 2009 8:38 AM

boqueronman said "...once a Progressive, always a Progressive."

Actually, seems to me this is a perfect demonstration that they're not progressive but regressive, inasmuch as they would like to see the earth returned to its "natural state," preferably with mankind either removed altogether or constrained to a primitive tribal life, living "harmoniously" with nature.

Posted by: Julie at March 18, 2009 9:02 AM

As has been said in another context, "Progressives can't reproduce; they have to recruit."

As the original argument concludes, this is sufficient reason to keep them out of schools...

Posted by: at March 18, 2009 10:59 AM

In his farewell address, Eisenhower not only warned us against the military/industrial complex, but also against the influence of people like Murtaugh on governing policy.

There are two uses for euthanasia for humans:

1) Capital punishment

2)Euthanizing all those influential people who are enthusiastic about euthanasia.

Posted by: Roderick Reilly at March 18, 2009 11:51 AM

1) The proper definition of Progressivism:

The harnessing of decent impulses towards twisted ends

2) The proper definition of Socialism:

The harnessing of other people's decent impulses towards twisted ends

3) The proper definition of Communism:

The harnessing of other people's decent impulses towards twisted ends and then killing those people.

Posted by: Roderick Reilly at March 18, 2009 11:55 AM


As a wise man (me, in this case) was wont to comment over 20 years ago,

"Ignorance is curable; idiocy is chronic."

Posted by: Rob De Witt at March 18, 2009 12:02 PM

Environmentalism is the last respectable refuge of of racism and misanthropy. Scratch them and they always come back to there are too many babies, and way too many brown babies.

Posted by: Fat Man at March 18, 2009 12:47 PM

Evil Rob says, "You can't arrive at an estimate using math. That's not what estimate means. You might have a vague calculation, which is meaningless."

Posted by: B. Durbin at March 18, 2009 5:05 PM


I should have thought of that "carbon footprint" announcement format for the ones I just printed telling the world about or brand-new baby girl. (That was Jan 31st. So we're late on the announcements. Big deal.) Yep, she's a "danger to the world's ecology", that's the spirit! Her 2-year-old big sister, too!

Did I tell you that we named her Reagan? That alone should drive a few of those nuts into the insane asylum.

If that nut wants to save humanity from CO2, maybe he can do humanity a favor and off himself first... Maybe... Or does he think he's too smart and too intellectual to drink off the cup of Socrates?

From a happy (and pretty pissed off at enviro-nuts) mother,


Posted by: newton at March 19, 2009 12:46 AM

Newton, you'd have loved something that happened to me years ago as I was expecting my fourth child. One of those "save the whales, the hell with people" types accosted us at a mall and began to lecture about overpopulation. My childens' father listened politely for a few minutes, them declared himself converted. He offered to take us all to find a suitable high place and promised to push me and the children over the edge right after her, but strangely her devotion to abolishing humanity had faded and she left without even saying goodbye!

Come the ice age, they'll be begging us to reproduce and warm the earth with our swarms of offspring.

Let's hope the progressives have followed the EARTH FIRST! plan and are sterilized by then. Because sadly, not all progressive men are gay and not all progressive women are saving themselves for Obama. And the idea that even one child might find himself born into a home where he will be abused by mandatory Godlessness and malnourished with a vegetarian diet, sickens all right thinking people.

Posted by: askmom at March 19, 2009 3:00 AM