January 23, 2004

Microsoft to Join the United Nations

With Ted Turner down to last billion and his $4 billion pledge to the UN sent to a collection agency in Atlanta , Bill Gates has stepped up to the plate with the opening move of Microsoft's plan have itself declared a nation-state: Gates Announces Partnership With U.N.

Whether Microsoftia ™ will become a stockocracy or stay the benign despotism that it has been remains to be seen. It has not yet been disclosed if Bill Gates’ position is going to be made hereditary at the next annual meeting.

Whatever ensues, Microsoft is taking the old-fashioned route towards becoming a nation-state; bribery. And what better place to grease the global palm that at that crucible of client states, the World Economic Forum?

DAVOS, Switzerland Jan. 23 -- Microsoft Corp. and the United Nations will work together to bring computer technology and literacy to developing countries, Microsoft chairman Bill Gates said Friday.

Microsoft pledged software, computer training and cash to establish computer centers in poor communities, starting with pilot projects in Egypt, Mozambique and Morocco.

The initiative will draw from a $1 billion Microsoft Unlimited Potential fund, which the U.S. software giant launched last year.

The company has already donated nearly $50 million to 45 countries, and Gates said he hoped to "ramp it up" to $200 million a year through the new partnership with the U.N. Development Program.

At a news conference at the World Economic Forum, Gates said the computer centers won't be restricted to using Microsoft products.

"There's no exclusivity, but our role is to help with the expertise and curriculum around software that is quite popular and happens to belong to Microsoft," he said.

“...[T]hat is quite popular and happens to belong to Microsoft. You gotta love this guy.

Back when I used and bought Microsoft products I always thought that after I paid for them they belonged to me. More fool I. Now I know that they will always "happen to belong to Microsoft." Must have been something in that 15,000 licensce agreement I failed to notice.

Still, I suppose America can come to some sort of non-aggression pact with Microsoftia ™ once it chooses, buys and moves onto its island in Puget Sound. It’ll probably be a fine place to live. Free lattes, free Jolt cola, and free high-speed internet for all. You’ll have to address Bill as ‘Your Nerdness’ but other than that he’ll just be a regular guy. With a seat on the Security Counsel and a flag displaying the rising @ right above Microsoftia ™ motto: ONE OS TO BIND THEM ALL.

Posted by Vanderleun at January 23, 2004 10:10 AM | TrackBack
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