Barack Obama: Imaginary Friend of Democrats. Cause and Cure.

Last night upon the stair
I saw a man who wasn’t there.
He wasn’t there again today.
I hope he never goes away
-- Variation on a nursery rhyme

Before the flowers of friendship faded friendship faded.
-- Gertrude Stein

Atheists, like songwriters, are always seeking lines more glib than true. Glib is golden because it obscures the fact that deep down atheism is, like a pop song, shallow. One of the more tedious quips, oft repeated with a tone that oozes ‘What a good boy am I,’ is "God is just an imaginary friend for adults.”

The possibility that God may have given glib atheists everything – space, time, a planet, evolution, and free will – that allows this bromide to roll trippingly off their tongues is something they will not and can not conceive. Their wetware is not evolved enough to perceive God should He deign to reveal himself. God is not finished buffing out their fatal flaw, although He will be, by and by. Until then they cannot grasp that, in some cases, “imaginary friends” can be as real as their friendship is illusory.

Exhibit A today are yesterday's elections which established the new truth of contemporary American politics, “Barack Obama is the imaginary friend of Democrats.” This dovetails well with another of his many roles, stand-in lower-case god for the vast majority of American atheists.

Even as Obama’s methods grow more radical, his means more aggressive, and his motives darker, and his stubbornness without will most Democrats polled persist in their belief that he really is their friend. It’s entirely imaginary, of course, since we see with every passing day that the “friendship” of Obama only lasts as long as it is needed -- by Obama. When the need is no longer there, the friendship fades like the Highland mist at dawn. The now tattered and overused phrase “Under the bus” has become code for “Any speed bumps on my road will be steam-rolled to a flat black stain on the pavement like an armadillo on an Arizona highway in August.”

And yet, if we are to believe the polls, Obama love endures

in many even as the pain grows. The tryst that was consummated in the soft and moonlit honeymoon suite in January now seems more and more like a long dark night in Michelle's Dungeon with no safeword. Incomprehensible as it may seem to any neutral observer many Democrats continue to believe, in the face of stark facts daily seen, that Obama is indeed their friend. It has to be tiring because this fantasy -- now entirely a product of the imagination -- requires that greater and greater energy is expended on the part of the believer in "Keeping it real."

How can they continue even as the whip comes down? They have no choice. Those that believe Obama is their friend find it necessary to believe. Why is Obama the imaginary friend necessary to them? Because, regardless of their age, all Obama acolytes and most Democrats are children. They need to believe in Obama like Virginia needs to believe in Santa Claus, and like a beaten woman needs to believe her man really loves her. These are immature attitudes but in the USA of the 21st century “immature” is what we do. It's the one sector of manufacturing in which we still lead the world.

We’ve been producing the manchild. the femchild, and the girly-boy in this country for decades. What the Chinese emperors once did to women's feet we can now do to human souls and we're not outsourcing. The binding that cripples the soul begins in the early indoctrination of kindergarten, where they learn all they need to know and then stop learning much of anything else. To make sure it sticks, the indoctrination is repeated for as long as they remain soaking in the thick multicutural, transnationalist, progressive soup of the educational system: “The New York Times, Grievance Group, Government, Diversity = Good” vs “The Great Books, Individualism, Responsibility, America = Bad.” That’s pretty much it these days. Rinse and repeat that mantra like a Hari Krishna on crack and you too can actually succeed in school right up to a Ph.D. in “Diversity Studies.”

It’s BigEd’s formula for stunting spiritual growth and producing big Peter Pans and Pams that won’t and can’t grow up. As a result the liberal Democrat’s capacity for sustaining imaginary friends never really abates. Indeed, with some many Baby Hueys living well into their fifth and sixth decade the imaginary friend demand was exceeding the supply. This was all solved by BigMedia’s manufacture and distribution of Barack Obama as a kind of “Barabi Doll – The Only Imaginary Friend You’ll Ever Need.”

As some have gotten chary of pointing out, Obama was tailor made (by a tailor in an undisclosed location) for rich and/or liberal white people. It was a classic example of branding a substandard product in such a way that it gained major market share in the target demographic. Without them, he was nothing. Without him, they were less than zero.

What was the product? It was “Your New Best Friend in the White House.” It was “President Bartlet, But Better.” To underscore this point comedian and soothsayer Chris Rock has a routine in which he relates, “These days black folks have a LOT of white friends and white folks all have ONE black friend.” This has, he notes, been a trend for quite some time and, given the relative percentages of African Americans versus Americans of the Caucasian persuasion, it was only a matter of time before the was an African-American/Caucasian friend gap.

Obama seems to fill that gap providing “a friend in need.” He’s cool. He’s slender. You not only want him to come for dinner but to stay for the long weekend. His family is picture perfect in a Tiffany frame. You want that frame on your ego wall. He knows what you like to hear, and he knows how to say it when he’s doing just the opposite. He’s so smooth you hardly feel it.

He’s a better liar than most politicians because he’s far beyond shame. Shame is for sissies. Most of all he knows how hard it is to stop loving someone even when you see them whoring night-after-night in the champagne court at the back of the DC titty bar. Indeed, Obama knows that once he can get you to stick around after he’s been unfaithful and knocked you around, you’ll stay around for even more abuse and infidelity. Why? Because you’ve come to need the abuse more than the love; you’ve come to want more than anything else to just spend more time close to him in the hope that he’ll change and finally feel your pain and feed your needs.

The problem is your needs may be real, but Obama’s got a full schedule when it comes to his “Let’s wreck America as quickly and completely as possible” needs. He just doesn’t have time to hang out. So you’ll just have to imagine him.

Where did this need for an imaginary friend come from? A 2006 study of the phenomenon of imaginary friends by Dr. Louise Newman, child psychiatrist and the director of the New South Wales Institute of Psychiatry , sheds a glimmer of light:

Most children grow out of imaginary friends, Newman says. But in some cases an imaginary friend can emerge in adulthood, usually in response to trauma, inability to cope with stress and sometimes psychotic illness.In rare cases some adults develop what's known as Doppelganger syndrome, which occurs when they believe a twin or invisible friend accompanies them.

Seen in that light, it’s easy to understand why so many folks retain the impression of Obama as their imaginary friend. It is, as it always is, the fault of George W. Bush. What was once the mental disease that crippled tens of millions of American minds, "Bush Derangement Syndrome" (BDS), has morphed into "Obama Arrangement Syndrome" (OAS)

which requires that people interpret or ignore events in a manner that reinforces their preconceived, and rigid, notions about Obama.

If BDS needed a 12-step program, OAS is going to need a 13-step program. It begins with, “We admited to ourselves and others that the idea Barack Obama was our friend was utterly imaginary, and no matter how many times he promised it we were never going to be sharing long, hot showers into the wee hours of the morning.”

Posted by Vanderleun at November 4, 2009 5:46 PM