I like #4. Note how islamic prayer is utterly and completely bereft of the faintest shred of dignity. Its adherents assume the position of a submissive dog, or a bitch in heat. Notice too, that the face is pointed directly toward Tartarus, while the anal orifice if offered directly to God.
Coincidence?

Hardly.

JWM

Love #5. Funny. #1 appears to be a photo shop. I wouldn't be surprised if that will be the marketing technique one day to lure more viewers.

HIGH FIVE FOR NUMBER FIVE.

Cila, ...'one day'..?

#3
Somewhere in Marin county a bed-and-breakfast is missing a bedspread.

JWM

No. 7

Oh boy, we have seen that playing somewhere before!

It was No. 8!

I wasn't following it that well!

#10:

So, who would want to go back with someone who would stand out like a sore thumb no matter what time period it was?

> 15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damn it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What’d you do after I didn’t answer? Drop the phone and run away?

This one is just stupid. They were still in YOUR voicemail when you called right back, idjit. Wait 60 seconds before calling back.

Like: "Duh".

A note to any female considering a tatt: Your natural born beauty quotient will immediately be reduced by a minimum of six points, even if it's a cute little flower on some discreet part of your body.
That is- if you are a 10, a stone gorgeous, drop dead beautiful, cover of a magazine babe, you will be reduced to a four- some skank a guy will maybe settle for after eight beers, and a line of crank, if the fat chick with bad teeth turns him down.
If you are a six, or a seven to begin with- a reasonably good lookin' gal whom any guy would date, you have placed yourself in the category of "Ugh. I'd rather go home and jerk it."

If you happen to be a four or lower- a homely gal, but still eligible because of your nice personality, you have taken yourself out of the game entirely. Invest in a small dog, and a vibrator.

JWM

6/19. My freezer has a light. Nyah.

I Don't Know His Name, But I'd Stay The Hell Off His Lawn If I Were You

That would be:

CAPTAIN ELISHA STEPHENS
1804-1887
A True Pioneer
Captain Stephens brought the first wagons
over the snow covered Sierra Nevada
Truckee Pass with no casualties in the
Stephens-Murphy-Townsend party of 1844,
arriving at Sutter's Fort with 11 wagons
and 51 people plus 2 infants born on the
way. Later wagon trains followed his
trail less well. A blacksmith by trade,
Elisha served under Commodore Stockton in
ordnance in the Mexican war, 1846-48.
Stephens was the first American
resident to homestead 160 acres in
"Westside" (Cupertino) in 1848 which he
called Blackberry Farm. In 1859, he added
155.57 acres from the Rancho San Antonio,
making 315.57 acres. His favorite food was
the ever-available rattlesnake. In 1862, he
sold all his properties to George McCauley
and William McClellan, respectively
because the area had become
"Too Durn Civilized!"

9. I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at least kind of tired.

Buy a motor-cycle and drive at 10% over the speed limit. Go skiing on a slope just a little too steep for you. etc.

A great friend will take apart all of your computers and hit anything suspicious with an axe - including jump drives - and will shred CD's.

Cursive may be unnecessary, but it is a joy to read good cursive, like my dad's, and I am proud that mine is legible.

When I know I am going to be unproductive (and nothing is pressing) I review my files and make sure I haven't missed anything.

Run over a Ninja? Back up and repeat several times, then spin the tires on the body. Can't be too sure.

And remember - always start your snowmobile before you set off the explosives that will bury the chalet the hero is trapped in with an avelanche. I cannot emphasize this enough.

Oh - if you are buying a house and the owner says that he is moving because the crawlspace is getting full - run.

Bad decisions make good stories. The best of those are where it is someone else's bad decision and you are there to watch/do the rescue/clean-up the remains after the police (or paramedics or Coast Guard or whomever) have finished dealing with the onset of terminal stupid or excessive enthusiasm.

And yes, alcohol will be involved somewhere.

"A note to any female considering a tatt: Your natural born beauty quotient will immediately be reduced by a minimum of six points, even if it's a cute little flower on some discreet part of your body.

JWM "

I never liked a tattoo anywhere on my body. Why should I like it on a man? They've always been a turn-off.

Blognative dissonance: the comments don't match the pics! heh.

JWM...you're spot-on about tattoos on females.

My first thought upon seeing one is "Aw..." . It's the same reaction I have to seeing graffiti on a beautiful house.

I never realized before that curling was so...titillating. Thanks for enlightening me.

And please tell the guy with the Shop Job on the Kenya sign, thanks, nice thought, but next time please learn something about written Arabic before posting it on the net.

مرحبا بكم في كينيا
مهد البراق أوباما

is more or less how it should look.

"marHaba bakam fi kenya,
mahad al-buraq obama" if you're interested in the pronunciation.

"Blognative dissonance: the comments don't match the pics! heh."

The software in this post is a bit of javascript that calls the last 10 posts only. This means posts that a comment may refer to has scrolled off. Since this post comes and goes there can be many posts between this collection and the last comment. Dissonance to be sure.

“Efficiency is the enemy of serendipity.” But plan A is what you do when serendipity doesn't work out.

Stealth lesbianism, huh?
Lesbos or not, something tells me I don't like either of those girls. Not like it matters, but still...

JWM