Who says there's no good news? This guy lived the dream, being paid to boff the beauty queen next door.

At least until the lawsuits started. And now millions of teenage boys all over the globe have a new goal to - well, never mind.

I'd just say, "Hey, 73rd time's the charm."

It's hard, ah, difficult to say what's the best part of this story. The star-crossed boinkers named Mouse and Trout, or Mouse's wife complaining about losing his affection while in reality trying to cover up her cuckoldry of him.

"The majority of the stupid is invincible, and will be with us always." - Albert Einstein

Am I twisted for thinking that is the funniest story I have read in years?
'Frank, I don't want you having sex with that Soupolos tart, even though, your kids? We must talk.'

Aristotle, Aeschylus, and Nietzsche were having this conversation.
Aristotle--This is the reason mothers are more devoted to their children than fathers: it is that they suffer more in giving them birth and are more certain that they are their own.
Aeschylus--Unions in wedlock are perverted by the victory of the shameless passion that masters the female among men and beasts.
Nietzsche--Woman was God's second mistake.

Jeez, no wonder celebrities just go and buy kids.