"Okay, let's go over this one more time.... think, think....
One forty-five caliber automatic squirt gun;
Two boxes of nutrient supplements for taking off nagging belly-fat;
Four days' concentrated emergency bile;
One drug issue containing ludes, morphine, X, uppers, downers, lithium;
One copy Candian Suicide Hotline 800 Number
One miniature combination French Phrase Book and Greatest Hits of Andrew Sullivan;
One hundred dollars American, one hundred dollars in gold equalling $12,463 dollars Canadian.
Nineteen pounds of primo medical marijuana -- better make it 20 in case it takes more than a day to get there.
One prophylactic (small.)
Three lipsticks in my favorite trendy shade -- "Ghoul";
Three pair of nylon stockings in case I get a runner.
"Shoot, a fella' could have a pretty good weekend in Vegas with all that stuff."
Posted by Vanderleun at October 30, 2004 5:08 PM | TrackBackI'm even more excited about all the creeps in Calimexico that are moving to Canada. That bad, bad Bush ain't gonna rain on their parade. No siree.
Maybe Michael Moore will move to France so he and Jacques Chirac won't have to continue their long distance love affair!
Ron,
I work long hard hours here at American Digest and that last little image is something I DID NOT need.
Ron, thanks for ruining my day. I hope you feel proud.
Posted by: FH at November 3, 2004 7:38 PMCold, cold, cold. But truly and fully deserved.
Posted by: P.A. Breault at November 3, 2004 7:39 PMA couple of ounces a day of current medical grade hydro will suffice for even a total droolcase, and good herb is easier for a new arrival to find in Vancouver than in San Francisco.
Posted by: triticale at November 3, 2004 8:09 PMGotta give you squeegee brains credit. You don't know much, but you do know how to gloat.
Posted by: Meteor Blades at November 3, 2004 11:00 PMYou think this is gloating - wait until you meet the guards at the Mojave Gulag...
Posted by: P.A. Breault at November 3, 2004 11:33 PMNow *that's* funny!
Posted by: Gerard Van der Leun at November 3, 2004 11:45 PMImportation of even toy guns is verboten in the
Great White North. So is gold except for jewelry.
I know this first hand, as I was stopped in '74
and detained for 7 hours. But don't tell Kos, he
might piss of a Mountie and get really detained.
Or 'mounted' as they say up there eh? Giddyup go!
O Canada, our home and native land!
True patriot love in all thy sons command.
With glowing hearts we see the rise,
The True North strong and free!
From far and wide, O Canada,
We stand on guard for thee!
God keep our land glorious and free!
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee!
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee!
I'm glad you all think this is so funny. I actually live in Canada (I'm an American) and the thought of these despondent Americans being added to the already flourishing nut pool up here has the Canadian right and libertarians (yes, there are some such) very worried. Like the leftists here need reinforcements!
Maybe you could advise these people that the winters here are mild and balmy before they finish packing. If we can't keep them out we can at least cheer as they freeze to death while Canada implements her Kyoto committment. That scenario would have a certain justice to it and would solve everyone's problems.
You could also advise them that Jean Chretien loves cream pies and to be sure to declare on their customs forms that they are bringing him several.
Posted by: Debbye at November 4, 2004 7:28 AMNow, as a conservative, I really don't see this as gloating. Truly. If anything, we're very grateful to Canada for performing a national service on our behalf.
Posted by: Woody at November 4, 2004 7:35 AMWhat's Debbye talking aboot, eh?
Posted by: Stephen B at November 4, 2004 8:33 AMI smell an opportunity for an enterprising Coyote to work farther north; no one cares if the illegals are leaving the US. Besides, the leftist-migrants can afford 10X the fee the Mexicans have to pay.
Posted by: P.A. Breault at November 4, 2004 6:55 PM"It is impossible to speak in such a way that you cannot be misunderstood." -- Karl Popper N.B.: Comments are moderated to combat spam and may not appear immediately. Comments that exceed the obscenity or stupidity limits will be either edited or expunged.