January 25, 2011

Religion of "Chew Everything to Pieces" Making Converts on Planet Moonbat

Yes, now that children are out and dogs are in, it was only a question of time before Doga - Dog Yoga

"The NY Times [of course] defines Doga as “massage and meditation with gentle stretching for dogs and their human partners.” Yes, it’s yoga with your dog. From Seattle to Chicago to Manhattan, doga instructors run classes where you can do:

* chaturanga – our canine friends sit with their paws in the air
* upward-paw pose – doggies are lifted onto their hind legs
* resting pose – “person reclines, with legs slightly bent over the dog’s torso, to relieve pressure on the spine”

I've had four dogs in my life, King, Potemkin, Storm, and Peri. They were good dogs and I loved them all. But they were dogs. And they knew they were. They were not, as we see these days in so many people young and old, replacement children, or extensions and pretensions of the secular self.

There's nothing wrong with the dogs and what they give to their masters as companions. I know that and I respect that. At the same time, it is faintly and persistently troubling to me to see the proliferation of gourmet dog shops, the downbreeding of dogs into purse-sized accessories, and the extreme life-saving measures taken by so many to keep their dogs with them long after the natural course of events would have the dogs moving on.

Raising dogs is much simpler, and in many ways so much easier, than dealing with humans, and in a society that has cheapened the child and abandoned the child -- in so many ways both before and after birth -- it's easy to see how dogs are some sort of weird changeling.

Like so many things, love for a dog is a question of degree. And, like so many things, the degree of love for dogs of late has become extreme and beyond neurotic for many. I can't condemn it on a case by case basis. I like dogs too much for that. But the extremity of it in many cases makes me uneasy. I think that comes when I see or find a situation in which loneliness and yearning has overcome sense and sensibility.

I would like all good dogs to either live longer than their masters or be able to join with them in heaven. But I don't think the former would be good for dogs and I'm not sure about the latter.

It's a testament to the infinite patience of dogs with human insanity and sheer moonbattery, that they would put up with something like "doga." It's sad that people can be brought to the point that they would put dogs through it. Like many other things visited upon these good and patient companions, it shouldn't happen to a dog.

doga-dog-yoga-01.jpg

Posted by Vanderleun at January 25, 2011 8:03 AM
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Should you decided to open a doga studio in Dallas, one of my sisters-in-law will sign up to be your first client.

Promise.

If you do a cat version (pussyoga?) the other one will sign up.

Posted by: Mike at January 25, 2011 8:50 AM

Now that is sick stuff. And yes, some have said that I am too devoted to my extremely athletic and handsome German shorthaired pointer. But heck, I give him a great life as a dog, we live on the farm just so he can hunt every day, as he was born to do. No way should he be squeezed into some neurotic humanoid pastimes that don't speak to his nature.

Posted by: Seppo at January 25, 2011 8:51 AM

German shorthair? That was my dog Potemkin (Po). Grrrreat dog. Loved him.

Posted by: vanderleun at January 25, 2011 9:04 AM

"Like so many things, love for a dog is a question of degree." Right there is the problem.

Another difficulty is when you can see the problem, yet cannot address the issue head on in the interest of keeping the family peace. The sister-in-law has these two dogs that are her longest running relationship. Far longer a relationship than she has ever had with a man. Yet she doesn't see that she allows the dogs to just be dogs. She would never allow a man to just be a man.

She also lets these dogs run wild in her life. She will bring them to a family gathering and they will run around jumping up on everybody but me. They don't jump on me because they know I'll kick them across the yard if they did. I haven't kicked them, but they are well aware that I will. They come up to me and sit and wait to be petted. I'm the only family member that likes the dogs (go figure).

Since I'm off in the weeds here (the e-mail server is down at work this morning), I'll continue. I think there is a significant parallel between her undisciplined dogs and her inability to demand respect from the dickheads she has dated.

Posted by: Mike at January 25, 2011 9:25 AM

I love dogs, but haven't had any since childhood. It's hard enough with small children, and even now that they are grown, I just don't want the hassle. I saw the insanity of anthropomorphizing a dog into a child with an adult piano student who had a Weimaraner that didn't take kindly to having his mistress occupied at the piano for a scant half hour. He was treated like a naughty toddler rather than a spoiled and out of control dog. I finally gave up after she invited the 'boy' to sit on the piano bench with her during our lessons. Weimaraners don't fit well on piano benches, and they don't play duets very well, either.

Posted by: Jewel at January 25, 2011 9:30 AM

Jewel, of course not. Weimeraners are much better suited to the clarinet, they are not piano players

Posted by: Dan D at January 25, 2011 12:35 PM

Exactly my thought, too. Especially after hearing him whine after being locked in the garage.

Posted by: Jewel at January 25, 2011 12:50 PM

Frankly I like most dogs better than I like most people. But that is only in the aggregate. There is however a reason that the dog is the psychopomp for the Zoroastrians.

Posted by: Punditarian at January 25, 2011 1:43 PM

My dog would never respect me again. And isn't that the point of having a pet?

Posted by: RedCarolina at January 25, 2011 2:07 PM

Some dogs are interested when humans get on the floor and exercise, because the floor is their usual space. They think there might be some play involved. Some dogs will try to imitate stuff that humans do, including exercises. Also, dogs often enjoy having certain muscles rubbed.

This is about as far as the connection between dog and yoga should go, unless the dog has a real need for physical therapy. Even then, it's not something you'd want to force your dog to do. Find something real for your dog to do with you.

Posted by: Maureen at January 25, 2011 4:56 PM

All I can say is, as someone who loves their animals...

Let your animals be ANIMALS.

IT'S WHAT THEY ARE!

Posted by: Phil Fraering at January 25, 2011 9:32 PM

When I was a kid, our dog Ruby (short for Rubinstein) loved the piano. Back then I could fit my ass and a dog on a piano bench, and when I played, she'd 'roooo' which is what she did instead of barking. Irish Setters are crazy fun. Wired for sound. Probably wouldn't handle yoga well, though.

Posted by: Jewel at January 26, 2011 12:48 AM

My cats are quite proficient at their own type of feline yoga. They come by it naturally and don't need any help from me to practice it. And they would never tolerate what these poor dogs are going through.

Posted by: waltj at January 26, 2011 8:44 AM

Just another example of how incredibly wealthy society really is, that it can spend money on this.

Posted by: Eric Blair at January 26, 2011 9:16 AM

Why the Hell would an animal already limber enough to lick its own dick need yoga?

Posted by: Don Rodrigo at January 26, 2011 11:00 AM

"Chaturanga" was the Indian name for the game that evolved into chess. I'm not sure what that has to do with dog yoga.

Posted by: rickl at January 26, 2011 6:16 PM

Apparently Sanskrit "chaturanga" means four-limbed or four-part. It was used as a kenning for "army". There are also various yoga poses with "chaturanga" as a descriptor ("chaturanga dardasana" = four-limbed staff).

Shrug. Weird stuff happens with languages.

Posted by: Maureen at January 26, 2011 6:34 PM

It was used as a kenning for "army".

Thanks, Maureen. That makes sense, since the game of chaturanga was basically a war game played on a board. The pieces represented foot soldiers, horsemen, war elephants, chariots, etc.

Posted by: rickl at January 26, 2011 7:21 PM