August 27, 2009

Is It Too Soon? (Updated) (Updated) (Updated) (Updated) (Updated)

Probably not....

tweetkennedy.jpg
HT: Doug Ross

Nope, probably not....


INCOMING! Opening Salvos of "Ted's Dead" Charm Offensive begin to bracket America --

Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water:

"Listening to "Reflections on Sen. Kennedy ... Lion of the Senate" on the Diane Rehm Show on the drive home last night, I was deeply moved to hear Newsweek's Ed Klein tell guest host Katty Kay about Kennedy's love of humor. How the late senator loved to hear and tell Chappaquiddick jokes, and was always eager to know if anyone had heard any new ones." -- Jules Crittenden » Dems In Mourning

No doubt about it. This is going to be the biggest Catholic (Mourning-in-America) Funeral since Pope John Paul II.

In a bizarre chunk of yearning and transference, Kennedy groupie Melissa Lafsky at the Huffington Post channels Mary Jo Kopechne from beyond the grave:

It doesn't automatically make someone (aka, me) a Limbaugh-loving, aerial-wolf-hunting NRA troll for asking what Mary Jo Kopechne would have had to say about Ted's death, and what she'd have thought of the life and career that are being (rightfully) heralded. Who knows -- maybe she'd feel it was worth it. -- The Footnote Speaks: What Would Mary Jo Kopechne Have Thought of Ted's Career?

Seeing the way this is shaping up I don't know whether to buy hip boots, the full Hazmat suit, or a snorkel. Probably all three.

No doubt about it, this is going to be The Full Wellstone Auto-Fornication Festival cubed, but I swear that if they trot out...

jackieimpprofile-big.jpg

...some horse sired from Black Jack with boots reversed in the stirrups like they did for JFK and LBJ, I'm going to go mental.


floatercar.jpg

HT: Gawker

Update: This just in via email from Jeff.

ussteddy.jpg

Posted by Vanderleun at August 27, 2009 7:51 AM
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Comments:

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"It is impossible to speak in such a way that you cannot be misunderstood." -- Karl Popper N.B.: Comments are moderated and may not appear immediately. Comments that exceed the obscenity or stupidity limits will be either edited or expunged.

HA!
Too late.

Posted by: David C McKinnis at August 27, 2009 8:31 AM

Feckin' Brizilliant.

Posted by: AskMom at August 27, 2009 8:51 AM

How times have changed. Can you imagine the outcry, the rage, the furor, the hysterical 24/7 ranting, if such an ad would appear TODAY, that dared to sharply lampoon a popular leftist politician in that manner. Such as Obama.

Can we say "Whole Foods," boys and girls?

If the "wrong" politician was lampooned like that today.....Oh the marches, the editorials, the profanity-laced blog posts, the youtube rants, the nationwide led boycotts of Volkswagon.

The VW-USA marketing chair would have to be frog-marched into court for committing a hate crime.

Oh for days prior to political correctness.

Posted by: SunnyJim at August 27, 2009 8:57 AM

Damn, I was gonna roll with that one today!

Posted by: Daphne at August 27, 2009 10:30 AM

Heh. By the way, when I first saw the bottom photo it was captioned "The U. S. Navy inaugurates its Terrorist Catch-and-Release program."

Posted by: pst314 at August 27, 2009 11:14 AM

Thanks for adding a good laugh to my day.

Posted by: Sara (Pal2Pal) at August 27, 2009 1:06 PM

I'm a little surprised that cancer didn't leave him alone. Whatever happened to professional courtesy?

Posted by: Gagdad Bob at August 27, 2009 5:37 PM

If not for penicillin, Teddy might have gone out like Henry the eighth.
It was three days before they could smell the stench of death over the stench of syphilis.

Sorry, but I reside in Massachusetts, and the constant stream of weeping sycophants on TV every time I turn it on is making me sick.

Posted by: John at August 27, 2009 5:49 PM

"Is it too soon?"

No.

Why are we pretending? He was a sleazy drunk.

Posted by: mare at August 27, 2009 6:13 PM

Did I say sleazy? I meant creepy.

Posted by: mare at August 27, 2009 6:14 PM

A Senator's Corpse Doesn't Make a Bad Idea Good.

Posted by: Morgan K Freeberg at August 27, 2009 7:11 PM

There is a lot of truth to that first "ad". And a small blessing to what was a horrible, tragic death.

Posted by: pdwalker at August 27, 2009 7:33 PM

I myself am very grateful to the Senator. Grateful that he never drove any female member of my family anywhere in his car.

Posted by: ELC at August 27, 2009 7:59 PM

These Hyanniscrap asswipes deserve to have their noses shoved deep into the fact that millions of us - yes fucking millions - never bought into the Kennedy horsescrap, and particularly not into the woman-abusing corruptocrat hypocrital dirtbag that the last, thank God, of Godfather Kennedy's offspring became.

Good riddance to trash. The fact that so few of the "intelligesia" understand that is a testament to their moral prostituion.

Posted by: sherlock at August 27, 2009 8:21 PM

Okay I meant "intelligentsia", but you knew that. God in heaven, I hate the Kennedys... could you tell?

Posted by: sherlock at August 27, 2009 8:25 PM

I've been waiting for the 'Mayor Quimby Fest" to begin, seeing as Ted is the archetype Quimby. Shall I take a stab at it?

"It's time we face up to the un-face-up-to-able"

"Very well then, instead of fleeing this town, I'll stay here and grow fat off kickbacks and slush funds."

"Our city will not negotiate with terrorists. Is there a city nearby that will?"

"You can't seriously want to ban alcohol. It tastes great, makes woman appear more attractive, and makes a person virtually invulnerable to criticism."

Posted by: (another) Gerard at August 27, 2009 9:02 PM

I think we'll be spared the horse with the reversed boots. That's a military courtesy, and EMK was never the commander-in-chief (although he did a two-year military stint during the Korean war).

Posted by: Gordon at August 27, 2009 10:17 PM

Gagdad Bob-

Perhaps the cancer was envious.

Outstanding post, Gerard! Great pics! :^)

Posted by: USS Ben at August 27, 2009 10:19 PM

For a minute there I thought you were talking about Black Jack Bouvier. But I believe the only thing he ever sired besides Jackie O and Lee Radziwill was something that dropped out of Cole Porter's butt.

Posted by: Velociman at August 28, 2009 3:32 AM

Don't be too sure about not getting the riderless horse, Gordon. It's a military honor that is provided to O6 officers and higher. But recall that JFK's son, who never ever served in the military, was given a naval burial at sea.

Posted by: dan at August 28, 2009 5:52 AM

No. Not at all:

http://men.style.com/gq/features/landing?id=content_5585

Posted by: Matt at August 28, 2009 8:05 AM

As for Martha's Vineyard and the vacationing mourner-in-chief:

Blow, winds, and crack your cheeks! rage! blow!
You cataracts and hurricanoes, spout
Till you have drench'd our steeples, drown'd the cocks!

Shakespeare

I think that about covers it. Unfortunately, Dan has been downgraded but should suffice.

Posted by: Cathy at August 28, 2009 11:02 AM

This has been one long nightmare for the Kopechnes, family of the woman solely responsible for keeping Ted from doing more damage in the White House than he did in the Senate. Imagine how their hearts are breaking again over this undeserved fanfare for a man so common that a Bowery bum at his lowest depths possesses more character than Ted ever evinced.

Posted by: Lucy at August 28, 2009 1:57 PM

That wasn't an official VW ad, of course. In fact VW was very upset when it appeared -- with their logo -- in the National Lampoon Encyclopedia of Humor. VW sued and NatLamp pulled all unsold copies.

I have mine.

Posted by: Kevin Murphy at August 28, 2009 3:12 PM

>>This has been one long nightmare for the Kopechnes

Well, maybe, but they took an undisclosed cash settlement from the Kennedys to go away, so it can't have been a complete vale of tears.

Posted by: Kevin Murphy at August 28, 2009 3:14 PM

Teddy was on the front line during the Korean War...guarding our embassy in Paris.

Posted by: Yang Wei at August 28, 2009 3:38 PM

Ted's dead baby, Ted's dead.

Posted by: RaptorMan at August 28, 2009 3:41 PM

Mary Jo Kopechne probably saved us from WW3. Think about it. He could have won in 1976 vs Ford: then, disarmament, the nuclear Briefcase in a crisis, two bottles of gin . . .

Posted by: Stillman at August 28, 2009 3:59 PM

Every time I saw Teddy Kennedy on TV over the past 30 years, I'd remember the old saw that eventually, every man gets the nose he deserves.

Posted by: bc at August 28, 2009 5:00 PM

Thank you all for this outstanding and literate thread. I feel better already, and have begun to lay in appropriate gallons of refreshments, in anticipation of the placement of Teddy's headstone. While I cannot be at Arlington, I can use a little silicone adhesive to afix a cunningly waterproof photo upon my local pub's porcelain wall fixture, right next to the existing and horrifyingly botoxified but still alive fossil Nancy Pelosi, the inestimably corrupt Barney Frank (n stein), the "you expect me to read this sh++" John Conyers and the biggest pisser of all, the pefectly corrupt Charlie Rangel. That leaves yet another appliance to fill with candidates, and I'm working on it now.
Suggestions appreciated.

Posted by: Inchoate at August 28, 2009 5:05 PM

Thank you all for this outstanding and literate thread. I feel better already, and have begun to lay in appropriate gallons of refreshments, in anticipation of the placement of Teddy's headstone.

While I cannot be at Arlington, I can use a little silicone adhesive to afix a cunningly waterproof photo upon my local pub's porcelain wall fixture, right next to the existing and horrifyingly botoxified but still alive fossil Nancy Pelosi, the inestimably corrupt Barney Frank (n stein), the "you expect me to read this sh++" John Conyers and the biggest pisser of all, the pefectly corrupt Charlie Rangel. That leaves yet another appliance to fill with candidates, and I'm working on it now.

Suggestions appreciated.

Posted by: Inchoate at August 28, 2009 5:06 PM

A lot of Massachusetts residents are still waiting to find out where Edmund "Eddy" Dinis got the money to buy a hotel and a radio station soon after letting Ted off from his chappaquiddick crimes.

Posted by: at August 28, 2009 5:19 PM

This is one of those occasions that I just have to imagine what the lefties would all be saying if this were either George H. W. or George W. Bush who had just passed.

Posted by: AST at August 28, 2009 6:50 PM

I love Volkswagen even more for this.

Posted by: cubedweller at August 28, 2009 7:33 PM

Here's to ol' Teddy! I've got a good bottle of single malt scotch to annoint his hallowed grave.

I hope he doesn't mind if I pass it through my kidneys first....

Posted by: Gray at August 28, 2009 9:53 PM


So Teddy was working a deal with Andropov to undercut President Reagan. That seems pretty close to treason.
Of course his father tried to backstab Britain during the early part of their war.

Posted by: Rob at August 28, 2009 11:57 PM

Ted Kennedy's Chappaquiddick Tweet

http://historicaltweets.com/2009/08/04/ted-kennedys-tweetup/

Posted by: AB at August 29, 2009 12:12 AM

To Meliisa Lafsky:

Yeah, I'm sure Mary Jane's last thoughts while trapped upside down in an automoblile sinking ever deeper into Poucha Pond were: this will all be worth it if Teddy becomes the "Lion of The Senate" and gets us universal health care - the cause of his life - and slanders and disembowels Robert Bork with false and wild accusations.

Slowly asphyxiating causes dereases oxygen to the brain which I guess can cause halucinations. Perhaps Ms. Lafsky is in the early stages and can be helped. We know for sure Mary Jane received no help from EMK...

Lafsky...it rhymes with Dumb Ass-Ky

BTW: Sorry for the typo above - "Lying Fat Bastard of The Senate" was misspelled as "Lion of The Senate."

Posted by: Captian Dutch at August 29, 2009 7:52 AM

Joseph Kennedy: "Democracy is finished in England. It may be here," stated Ambassador Kennedy in the Boston Sunday Globe of November 10, 1940. (From Wikipedia.)

The fact that is his own treasonous son Ted should have been tried for treason for contacting The KGB.

No sorrow here.

Lion of the Senate?

More like: Fat Hyena from Hyenas Port.

Posted by: JD at August 29, 2009 8:10 AM

GOOD RIDDANCE! WHEN WILL THIS B.S. BE OVER? I HAVE NEVER SEEN SUCH ADORATION FOR A MURDERER

Posted by: ANN at August 29, 2009 5:19 PM

Sherlock, I think you stumbled upon a brilliant concept with 'intelligesia'. Intelligence combined with amnesia gives you intelligesia. This new word means that the people, who think they are smarter than everyone else, have lost their memory and so produce writing, which they think is absolutely brilliant and everyone else thinks is criminally insane.

With the death of Ted Kennedy, we see intelligesia everywhere.

Posted by: Jabba The Tutt at August 30, 2009 3:55 AM

I was on the Enterprise when we launched that car off the flight deck, back in '99 I think. It was a charity event, where anyone could take a sledge to the car for a couple bucks. Then we got rid of it the best way we knew how.

Posted by: Richard at August 30, 2009 10:19 AM