1:25 AM, on a hill above an ocean, a high wind and rain falling.

We remember the past
and God remembers the future.
Then we forget the past,
God forgets the future,
and the world returns to chaos.

From: The Precision of Pain and the Blurriness of Joy:The Touch of Longing is Everywhere by Yehuda Amichai
Translated from the Hebrew by Chana Bloch and Chana Kronfeld

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 20, 2004 1:25 AM | Comments (1)  | QuickLink:

[Republished from American Digest, July 29, 2004 as a Homage to Hugh "It's gonna be a blow-out" Hewitt]

Democratic Party Electorial Prospects Post-Convention: Pick One

I'M FRIGHTENED TO WATCH THE KERRY SPEECH TONIGHT FOR THREE REASONS:

It will be a waste of life because, no matter what is said or done by Kerry or his true believers, there's no way to delay that Bush blowout coming every day.

Yup, it doesn't matter what he says or does from this point forward. Kerry and the Democrats are about to transform themselves from people into smouldering slabs of toast come November. The good part is that they're going to spend lots of money doing it.

So before the formal canonization of Kerry, I'd like to go on record as saying, along with a few other brave souls, that it is no longer a question of Kerry and the Democrats losing in November, but only one of how great and lasting their humiliation and degredation is going to be.

As far as I can see it is going to be massive: a Tsunami of rejection; a battering of the Bozos with no ref to stop the fight in the sixth round; a comet impacting dead center in the Democratic Fantasy World and smothering all but the deepest burrowing small rodents in a layer of ash half a mile thick; a landslide in which the entire north face of Mount Everest decides to take a vacation on the shores of the Indian ocean; a blowout equal to the hotspot under Yellowstone deciding to displace Krakatoa as the loudest implosion heard in recorded history; an "L" branded on the forehead of the Democratic party so large and so deep that travel agencies from Japan will divert a whole season of Grand Canyon tours to the nearest Kerry Compound just so they can marvel and photograph themselves standing at the brink.

Continued...

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 19, 2004 9:24 PM | Comments (58)  | QuickLink:

9,316 words from Al Gore will fix you right up.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 19, 2004 11:32 AM | Comments (1)  | QuickLink:

• England's New Scientist takes a look at the ramifications of the US Election 2004 and is generally ticked off that somehow the United States is not measuring up. Heavy hangs the head that wears the crown. But all in all, this selection of articles underlines how essential to the world the United States is, whether they like it or not. New Scientist tends not to like it. After all, just look at stem cells, will you? Please.

• For those guys that can't resist a sharp quiz, we recommend the dubious Cooking to Hook Up: The Bachelor's Date-Night Cookbook, which will tell you what kind of girl you are. I took it and, no, I'm not telling. If you're smart neither will you.

• But should you decide to confess, Lulu.com is into Self Publishing in a big way and will make it cheap and easy for you to get your salacious little gender-bending memoirs out there for a waiting world. And in that case, guys, we will all know just what kind of girl you are.
  

  
  

• And if, after taking the test and writing the book, you are still in a state of confusion, the scholarly study "The influence of sexual orientation on vowel production" will set you straight. Or not. Could this article be "The Bell Curve" for gays and lesbians. That depends on the orientation of the people making the study and that's not out yet.
  

  
  

• Moving right along, thank God, we direct you to the latest manifestation of Cassini's work in the outer reaches of the Solar System. Pictures of the South Pole... of Saturn.
  

  
  

• Back on Earth and matters much more mundane here's a meditation on When Email Attacks .
  

  
  

• And finally, if you've been patient enough to bear with me through all that, something truly remarkable: "This Wonderful Life." No, not that movie, but another, much shorter, and completly computer-generated short film that packs an amazing range of human emotion into what are really, at bottom, just bits and bytes. In the future, this is going to be how a lot of movies are made. And made well. See if you don't agree.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 19, 2004 1:18 AM | Comments (1)  | QuickLink:

I actually caught Jon Stewart's on-air evisceration of 'Crossfire' last week, and I have to admit I enjoyed the discomfort and confusion he brought to the dual tools of that broadcast. At the same time I also noted what a large, self-impressed tool Stewart has become.

I don't know about you but my gorge rises when a TV personality who's made his bones with long ironic sighs and sideglances starts to speak phrase like "We need you to be honest!" And that was only the center cut from Stewart's Tripe Store. I was especially taken by Stewart's reference to himself as one of the guys who is out "mowing his lawn"" while "Crossfire" fails to protect the Republic. Hey, I need Stewart to be honest. The closest people like Stewart come to mowing their lawn is telling their personal assistant to drive to some Southern California crossroads and hire an illegal alien to work the Weedwhacker.

All of which is why I was pleased to note The Daily Show's ratings were tanking . Not because I don't think Stewart is a funny-enough guy (even if his faux-serious pose is becoming a bit much), but because I think Stewart, like most other celebrities, is far too full of himself for his, or our, good.

But why, you might wonder, would The Daily Show tank? Well, one of my favorite curmudgeons, Uncle Mikey's , got it all figured out:

I just couldn't stand the not-so-veiled implication that I must be a real moron to want to vote for Bush any more, regardless of his and Kerry's relative merits. It's not funny. Stewart pretends to be unbiased in his assaults on the candidates, but he can't hide his distaste for W and his crew, and neither can he hide his admiration for John Kerry. Like the mainstream press, he thinks the 200 Swift Boat Vets for Truth are liars and Republican shills, but Richard Clarke and the nine Swift Vets who support Kerry are honest men who speak their consciences. In short, he's delusional and paddling as hard as he can to get the Kerry boat to the other side of the river, and in that he is no different from Dan Rather and Newsweek editor Evan "the media wants Kerry to win" Thomas. Nobody they know thinks any different from them, so when they encounter those who do, they must be crazy, or stupid, or just mean.

It's as if people like Stewart at MSM and elsewhere have had this secret meeting and decided they can do whatever they want to influence the elections and never have to pay any penalty. After all, why should they? If we take the famous Newsweek editor's admission that the "media" was going to to "put a glow" around Kerry/Edwards that would be worth 15 points, it's pretty clear to see why Stewart, Rather, Springsteen, and all the rest of this cozy little club is in panic mode.

Here they've given their boys a 15 point edge and they're still lagging, and lagging seriously. It's like betting on a shaggy nag in a horse race because you can put the fix in and then standing there and seeing your "sure-thing" horse come out the far turn and into the home stretch with only one leg. That while the cowboy on the Pinto is way out in front and opening up the distance with every stride. Not only is that no way to run a fixed-horse race, but it also seems that there's going to be a price to pay for fixing the race to begin with.

As I alluded to in the brief essay yesterday about "Intelligence" most celebrities seem to have a built-in contempt for the very people that hand our celebrities their wealth and fame. This kind of contempt was once called "noblesse oblige" - the obligation of those of high rank to be honorable and generous, but like everything else with a French connotation this concept has been perverted. In the bald hectoring and pot-kettle-black attacks by people like Stewart on his counterparts at CNN all we can see is an exercise in vaingloriousness that is much more often the mark of these talking heads than anything remotely generous or noble.

Now you might say this is because we've stopped expecting them to be noble and generous, but that doesn't seem to be the case. If the Stewart ratings tank is anything to go by, when a celebrity is seen to betray his bias openly, and when that in turn betrays his his own small-mind, the audience will turn away. Not that Stewart has any real worry about putting food on the table. That's what those guest slots at Las Vegas strip mall casinos are for. And if that fails him, I'm sure he'll be able to find work telling his peers in 2010 how to dial up their perfect sleep number.

====
Update: I note a strange sort of Blogsphere mind-meld on the Stewart issue today. Check protein wisdom ; Ghost of a Flea ; Jim Treacher ; Hog on Ice , and INDC Journal. Probably only scratches the surface, but I love it when this sort of thing happens.

Plus: Jeff Goldstein pops in this ancient link from, like last month, Twenty-first in a series of real-time empirical observations and calls it "Related." Whatever happened to the word "prescient?"

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 18, 2004 2:19 PM | Comments (28)  | QuickLink:

In a previous life, back when I had a Bobe , I'd note that whenever we came to a question of politics she'd say, with millions of other Bobe's, "Yes, but is it good for the Jews?"

Martin Perez asks the same question today about John Kerry and gives us the answer.

I've searched to find one time when Kerry --even candidate Kerry -- criticized a U.N. action or statement against Israel. I've come up empty. Nor has he defended Israel against the European Union's continuous hectoring. Another thing that bothers me about Kerry is the deus ex machina he has up his sleeve: the appointment of a presidential envoy. It's hard to count how many special emissaries have been dispatched from Washington to the Middle East to solve the Arab-Israeli conflict. What's easy to see is that none of them has gotten to "yes."
-- Kerry the Clueless

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 18, 2004 9:37 AM | Comments (0)  | QuickLink:

We'd strapped him to his bed for over a year,
Paid a fat, black woman to wear a white dress
Change his bed pan, and sit with him at night,
But when the bone white pigeon banked
Between the buildings in a pale twilight
The old man's brain liquefied.

Foam, whose tiny bubbles reflected my face,
Bloomed on his lips as he swallowed his tongue.
It said 5:47 on the red crystal clock by the wet bar.
His breath rattled around the room like some
Tired exhaust fan from the Roaring Twenties.

His wife was out shopping at Woolworths,
Or trying to sell something at Cartiers.
The black nurse was downstairs flirting
With Desi the tap dancing doorman.
Prince the chauffeur buffed the black Lincoln,
And wondered what he do when the old lady died.
My wife was teasing our toddler in the living room.
Everyone else was trying to get home from work.

Somewhere inside his skull sore nerves
Kept sending signals down to his heart.
I blotted his lips in that wheezing orange room
As his arms flapped like a beached fish before
The fisherman brings down the club.
I turned from the bed, pulled up the beige blinds,
And gazed out the window wondering
Where the bone white pigeon had gone.

Then I called the Doctor's number listening
To his breath until the call was answered.
"He's dying," I said to the man I'd never met.
"You should send an ambulance and a team
Of medics right now. He's going. Going fast."

The voice echoed back from far across town,
"He's home. He's been dead for a year, you know.
We just change the sheets and pay the nurses.
I can keep his body going as long--as long--
As long as you want. You need to tell me.
Look outside. How heavy's the traffic on Fifth?"

I looked down on a solid ribbon of oozing steel.
"Wedged," I said. "Hardly moving at all.
"Look at his eyes," the voice said. I looked
Down into his eyes and they had no bottom.
"Who's there?" the voice asked on the phone.
"No one I know," I said. "No one at all."

I held the phone and waited looking over the park.
"I'll send an ambulance when you tell me," he said.
The bone white pigeon came sweeping out of the light
And settled on the sill as calm as the quiet in the room.
"Send them when you can," I said.
"No hurry. They'll just be caught in traffic."

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 17, 2004 11:32 AM | Comments (2)  | QuickLink:

"US Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry walks toward a crowd of supporters after delivering a speech .... "In the end, George Bush and I just have fundamentally different approaches to jobs and the economy," Kerry said."

Via: LILEKS (James)

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 17, 2004 8:19 AM | Comments (1)  | QuickLink:

One of the most suspenseful moments in modern journalism came to an end today, when The New York Times, after months of coy beating around the bush, came out for Senator Kerry.

Although the final selection process was described by an unnamed insider as "A very close run thing," in the end it was John Kerry's unflinching celebration of the lesbian lifestyle of prominent Republican families that put him over the top.

"Maureen," said our source " was just not going to be denied and neither was Frank Rich. Once Kerry said "Lesbian Daughter," they both got so wet we had to mop the corridors between their offices twice.

"We knocked around the idea of supporting Bush quite a bit in the newsroom and up on the executive floor, but when Pinch came out of the Publishers' Suite and announced he was wearing pantyhose under his suit in honor of 'lesbian daughters everywhere,' we knew we had to go for it."

In editorials smeared all over the Saturday and Sunday editions, the Times shocked its conservative of readers on the Upper West Side, the West Village and the Meatpacking district by playing the moral high card.

Kerry "has qualities that could be the basis for a great chief executive, not just a modest improvement on the incumbent," the newspaper said. "He strikes us, above all, as a man with a strong moral core."

After "examining what the candidates have done in the past, their apparent priorities and their general character," the Times said "we enthusiastically endorse John Kerry for president." -- Kerry Collects Major Endorsement

"We'd been preparing a statement all weekend for Monday release that we really thought could turn the tide at the Times," said an unnamed senior aid to the President who spoke on deep background (and whose initials are K.R.) "We saw how the celebration of lesbian children was swaying the Times and we were going to fire back with our own heartfelf admiration for of Teresa Heinz Kerry's classic collection of cast-iron sex aids. But we just couldn't jam them in the right news cycles fast enough to satisfy the Times. Next time, we'll use Kinkos."

Asked if the Times endorsement was costly, the source replied candidly, "Why yes. We were really counting on the Times to deliver their numberless hoard of readers who have been enslaved to the paper so long that they do the Sunday Crossword in ink."

Early analysis by John Stewart (fresh from his on-air disembowelment of the entire CNN Pundit Team and feeling frisky) indicated that the Times endorsement had moved "...more than two and less than five undecided Times readers into the Kerry column. This is obviously a stunning and unexpected blow to the President. The only way he can possibly recover is by coming on my show every night between now and November 2. I remind you that The Daily Show really is the only place left on TV where a man can demonstrate integrity, integrity, integrity. On the other hand, since the lead-in to my show has a cast of a bunch of puppets, the editorial board of the Times would fit right in as well."

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 16, 2004 8:29 PM | Comments (2)  | QuickLink:

Stephen DenBeste, one of the most lucid minds around, posts a very interesting graph and an even more interesting analysis of the trend behind the months of presidential polling in Poll Trends, 20041016

His analysis is very compelling:

....My first suspicion would be that the test equipment was broken, but in the case of opinion polls there is no such thing. My second suspicion would be fraud.

In September, I think there was a deliberate attempt to depress Kerry's numbers, so as to set up an "October comeback". Of course, the goal was to engineer a bandwagon.

Public opinion isn't usually as ephemeral as these polls suggest that it is. But there can be long-term trends, and I find it interesting that such a thing actually does show through. It's quite striking how close some of the data falls to the long term trendlines which I've drawn in.

The reason the Democrats and the MSM are getting frantic is that they're losing.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 16, 2004 8:25 PM | Comments (5)  | QuickLink:

Roger Simon rolls the entire "plan" of the Kerry squad into a nice tight package:

The brutal truth is that the basic subject of the entire election, of the future going forward, is the neocon argument that (militant if necessary) export of democracy is the only viable solution to endless (possibly nuclear) conflagration . Bush bought into it to one degree or another. The Democrats seem to oppose it. I emphasize the seem because all they offer in opposition is a vague "plan." What this plan is is a mystery to everyone. I think there is a reason for that. There is no other plan.
-- Roger L. Simon: Tick-Tock

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 16, 2004 2:30 PM | Comments (0)  | QuickLink:

In the course of joining the "Lesbian Daughter" slugfest du jour, William Kristol asks, in passing, "How stupid does John Kerry think the American people are?" -- "Fair Game"

Mr. Kristol, while it is clear Kerry does not know the American people all that well, he does have a long and deep understanding of the Democrats among us.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 16, 2004 12:43 PM | Comments (1)  | QuickLink:

The fastest replicating virus infecting the Windows machines of the world this week had to be Google Desktop. Millions asked for it and millions got it. After all, it is free. Now. But in the future, it just might cost you some information if you want to get "enhanced functionality." And who doesn't want their functionality enhanced?

Paolo Massa has seen the next step and, well, it is interesting to contemplate:

When millions of users will have Desktop.google.com installed, Google will simply release a new version in which the user can check a box and say "Share the files in my disk" (maybe only files in a certain directory). This will create in a second an enormous P2P (peer-to-peer) network, in which you can search for files directly on other users' disks. What do you think? Make sense?
-- Paolo Massa Blog: Enormous P2P Network by Google

Back at the beginning of the 1990s, when I was employee #2 at the Electronic Frontier Foundation (and the web was the HTML/HTTP protocols slumbering on Berners-Lee's server at CERN), we fretted endlessly over the FBI/CIA/NSA/LLE snapping up your computer, getting a backdoor key to your ISP, having a secret decoder right for any cryptography that could be invented, and generally getting to your private information. That fretting continues today at numerous and multiple nodes across the web. It is a fretting only out-fretted by Spamfret. The EFF and other well-meaning wonk tanks in search of the Fountain of Funding continue to harvest planks from this petrified forest.

But nature always sides with the hidden flaw and the hidden flaw in this case was the users. It never, in our wildest speculations, dawned on us that the most potent and persistent threat to privacy on the Net would be the users themselves. If any of us had proposed at the beginning of the 90s that millions upon millions would give away the vast amount of information listed above to a company in exchange for a few chunks of code, we would have been barred from the next House/Senate sub-sub-committee on POTS subsidies to Podunk.

And yet, here we are. Big Brother in the form of a "Do no evil" company whose "benign" intentions are taken utterly on faith and without question by every connected soul on the planet.

Does anyone remember when Microsoft became the evil empire? It was at a point that was well below the position of ubiquity now enjoyed by Google. The result for Microsoft has been an unremitting stream of lawsuits and regulations extending well over a decade with no end in sight.

Can anyone imagine the same thing happening to Google? Perhaps, but only if a hard look at Google's plans and potential begins in the very near future.

Another couple of years and it will be well-nigh impossible. Why? Google will quite simply know too much.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 16, 2004 10:35 AM | Comments (2)  | QuickLink:

It seems like everyday I'm confronted with something the deeper meaning of which utterly confounds me.

Case in point : The Conference Bike Movie

To my mind the deeper meaning could be one of two things:

1) This proves that the terrorists can never win.

2) This proves that the terrorists deserve to win.

Which is it? You tell me.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 15, 2004 7:16 PM | Comments (4)  | QuickLink:

Terrorist killing, like the first World Trade Center bombing or the USS Cole, certainly was not seen as the logical precursor to 9/11 — the expected wages of a quarter century of appeasement that started with the weak Carter response to the Iranian hostages and was followed by dead soldiers, diplomats, and tourists about every other year. No, these were "incidents" like 9/11 itself — "law-enforcement" issues that called for the DA, writs, and stern prison sentences, the sort of stuff that barristers like Kerry, Edwards, Kennedy, and McAuliffe handle so well.

This attitude is part of the therapeutic view of the present struggle that continually suggests that something we did — not the mass murdering out of the Dark Age — brought on our present bother that is now "the focus of our lives." We see this irritation with the inconvenience and sacrifice once more reemerging in the Atlantic Monthly, Harpers, and the New York Times: We, not fascists and Islamist psychopaths, are blamed for the mess in Iraq, the mess in Afghanistan, the mess on the West Bank, and the mess here at home, but never credited with the first election in 5,000 years in Afghanistan or consensual government replacing autocracy in the heart of the ancient caliphate.
....

The artists, musicians, and entertainers have also railed against the war. In the therapeutic mindset, the refinement and talent of a Sean Penn, Michael Moore, Al Franken, Bruce Springsteen, or John Fogerty earn respect when they weigh in on matters of state policy. But in the tragic view, they can be little more than puppets of inspiration. Their natural gifts are not necessarily enriched by real education or learning. Indeed, they are just as likely to be high-school or college dropouts and near illiterates, albeit with good memories, voices, and looks. The present antics of these influential millionaire entertainers should remind us why Plato banished them — worried that we might confuse the inspired creative frenzies of the artisans with some sort of empirical knowledge. But you can no more sing, or write, or act al Qaeda away than the equally sensitive novelists and intellectuals of the 1930s or 1940s could rehabilitate Stalin.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 15, 2004 6:39 PM | Comments (3)  | QuickLink:

One of the oldest and most beloved beverages,is going closed source in this new method of brewing.

The yeast fuses itself to the surface and feeds the wort at an increased rate, meaning the fermentation process takes only a few hours.

Any normal brewer's yeast can be used in his process but the lifespan of the yeast is much longer than in traditional processing, where yeast degenerates after three brews and starts to affect the quality of the beer, says Heiliger.

"We tested it and after a year the yeast was still good. The beer still tasted fine. We wouldn't normally keep the same yeast for that period of time but it shows that you can do without cleaning for, say, six months," he says.

"My system is closed so once you put the yeast in, it stays there. You do not need to touch it. The more you touch the yeast, the greater risk of getting an infection which is deadly in a brewery."

Heiliger says that his device takes up about 30 square meters, whereas traditional systems can be up to 300 square meters in size.
CNN

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 15, 2004 4:39 PM | Comments (0)  | QuickLink:

We require a team manager, 2 web developers, 3 graphic designers, 1 multimedia designer and 3 reps to join up as a full time team in website design and graphic design to run as a freelance team as you will all be from different parts of the country (most likely).

All of you will have to be in contact with each other for at least 8 hours per day from 7am to 10pm via MSN Messenger or another IM program providing we all have it you will be all on my list so me and my admin team can monitor your online times and send you info etc.

Each of you will be given a business email addresses (first.lastname@company.com) which will have been registered for the .net service which will be your msn email address.

You will be paid an annual wage per month either by wire transfer or paypal, possibly a cheque, payment is in different tears for the type of role you play. All payments are calculated by the hour in 15 minute increments. You will be held at a basic payment price per hour for the first 2 months to allow me and the admin team to assess you as a person and also your work produced.
-- Tem Members (Online, UK) - Freelancers.net

Pointer via Need To Know 2004-10-15

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 15, 2004 12:19 PM | Comments (0)  | QuickLink:

Based on this report from our reporter in Minnesota, the editorial board at American Digest can only conclude that we were mistaken in our original enthusiasm for a Lileks candidacy. Therefore we take Mr. Lileks at his word (not to mention his actions ) and declare we will no longer support or report on this woeful incident in the history of the blogsphere.

We do this not just for Mr. Lileks, but "for the children."

=== JASPERWOOD, MN: EXCLUSIVE TO AMERICAN DIGEST ===

At his first and last news conference held in the elegant Tiki Lounge at Jasperwood, James Lileks today made the extent of his political ambitions clear. They are somewhere south of absolute zero.

In a stunning wrap-up to what has to be the most meteoric political career in

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 15, 2004 9:32 AM | Comments (0)  | QuickLink:

"The bow paddler is only an engine, paddling straight ahead. The stern paddler is the captain and makes all decisions: "Paddle, stop paddling, switch sides, back paddle." The stern controls direction by paddling with a J-stroke -- back and out - or using the paddle as a rudder. The passengers sit still in the middle. Nobody stands up."
-- Robert Fulghum

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 14, 2004 7:40 PM | Comments (1)  | QuickLink:

Integrity. Intergrity. Integreedy. Integrot.... aw, the Hell with it.

America's been through the rockiest start of a century in its history and yet, to judge by his accomplishments, John Kerry just hasn't been punching-in at the factory and getting it done.

It is coming up on 5 years into the 21st Century and, for all intents and purposes, Kerry is a no-show on the legislation front. All in all, you'd say his is career that spans 20 years, has about 9 "products shipped," but none in this century. Can somebody please tell me where I can get a job with those requirements? I'll take a pay cut, especially with Senate benefits.

It's well known that Kerry has been phoning in his career from his many different homes over the years. You can't miss 70% of your days at work without careful, assiduous planning and a lot of other places to hang out.

But if you look at the 9 (count 'em, nine) Bills and Resolutions by Kerry that actually became law, you'll note -- aside from the inane subjects they cover -- that all of them took place in the 20th Century. [See below]

Kerry started slow in the 1980s with one resolution to help a "Kil Joon Yu Callahan " -- which we assume was something done in response to demands from Kerry's Irish/Vietnamese constituency in Boston.

Then in the 1990s he set the Senate aflame with 5 (five) laws and 3 (three) resolutions that, among other things, changed the name of a building in Waltham, Massachusetts, got some change to protect marine mammals, and twice (2 times!) made the world aware of its population.

Whew! What a decade! No wonder the guy had to take a break from 1994 to 1999.

You'd expect someone with that many notches on his legislative gun to really start to shake up the Senate in the 21st century, but strangely there has been nothing out of JFK. Nothing at all.

He must have been saving it all up for something. Whatever could it have been? What could all his nothing have been for?

(Kerry's Stuff is here)

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 14, 2004 5:41 PM | Comments (4)  | QuickLink:

To keep those who would corrupt the process, the intent and the spirit of the Republic out of office.

EXHIBIT A:

Any other questions?

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 14, 2004 12:02 PM | Comments (2)  | QuickLink:

Hey, it's news to me:

• An amazing and stunning online exhibition: "Laura Ferguson: The Visible Skeleton""
  
• Very Thoughtful: "Design by Fire: Please make me think! Potential dangers in usability culture" seeks to send Jacob Neilson into early retirement. All right by me.
  
• Looming Traffic pileup on the Information Superhighway: CSS Gridlock (Arcane unless you're into this sort of thing.)
  
• Joel was on a roll when he wrote "Good Software Takes Ten Years. Get Used To it." Then he had to spoil it all by focusing on Lotus Notes.
  
• You are just a seething mass of bacteria, most of which isn't even you.
  
• Russian Males vs. the American Guy
  
• Elements of History: Fiction = Entertainment. Truth = Power
  
• "The disagreeable fact must also be faced that in Africa life has always been cheap, that extraordinary cruelties have been all too common, and that anything even vaguely resembling notions of human rights in its traditional societies were entirely unknown."
  
• I wasn't going to read the Dylan autobiography, but "Dylan Brings It Home: Memoir Is a Ballad To the Beat Village" has changed my mind."
  
• Ode to that coolest of tools, the pencil. [Not to be confused with Pencil Sharpener Imposters !!! ]
  
• First Rule of the Browsing the Web: If you haven't seen it, it's new to you.
  
• The 12 Tribes: From those that believe in everything to those that believe in nothing and how they vote in America.
  
• Excuse me, Captain, but could you make those soldiers raising the flag on Iwo Jima a bit more representative of a diverse and fair America?
  
• Smarter than the average motorcycle helmet.
  
• Jonah Goldberg has had it up to his kiester with the war wafflers.
  
• Lurk by the side of the road. Leap into the grill of a fast car. Ride it 25 miles. Extricate yourself. Wander back into the woods and munch a few green shoots. Just another day in the life of DeerDevil.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 13, 2004 2:34 PM | Comments (0)  | QuickLink:

Monroe : That region of the Congo's uninhabited.
Dr. Karen Ross : Well, something inhabits it.
Dr. Peter Elliot : What exactly did you see on that tape?
Dr. Karen Ross : A camp destroyed. People dead. A grey gorilla...
Dr. Peter Elliot : There's no such thing as a grey gorilla.
Dr. Karen Ross : Well, I saw one. -- "Congo, 1995"

One story that’s strong on buzz today is the all-new, ‘this time for real’, remake of “CONGO.”

Rumors of a "new kind of great ape" have got the Bigfoot crowd humming and booking tickets to the Congo. It’s very exciting to think we’ve discovered a “new” species of great ape, and perhaps we have. Except for the fact that this great ape may not be all that “new” after all.

What might be new, but not all that new as these things go, is the new public smackdown between two competing primatologists, Shelly Williams, wearing the white pith helmet armed with a video tape, and Karl Ammann, wildlife photographer, bushmeat activist, and a man who has been on the "Big Chimps of the Bondo" case for many years. What's also new is some National Georgraphic money in the mix.

It’s a popular notion that science is above the petty bickering of politics, but the reality is closer to Henry Kissinger’s famous remark: “Why are academic politics so vicious? Because the stakes are so small.“

Today’s story updates several that Shelly Williams did last year, but brings us a

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 13, 2004 11:27 AM | Comments (0)  | QuickLink:

MOLLY BLOOM, DEMOCRAT, TELLS HOW SHE DECIDED TO SUPPORT KERRY-EDWARDS:

"....yes when I put the sign on my lawn like the gender studies professors used or shall I wear a Kedwards Button yes and how he kissed but did not kiss me under the Moorish wall and I thought well as well him as another...."

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 13, 2004 7:39 AM | Comments (3)  | QuickLink:

Aptly named "Mist or Ghost?" this whole strange item is playing a bit too close to Halloween for my tastes.

Don't go to the link above. Just don't.

Hey, I told you not to do it.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 12, 2004 10:33 PM | Comments (5)  | QuickLink:

The Sunset Hills Memorial Park cemetery in Apple Valley is giving up grass in favor of artificial turf.

It's a move owners believe will save as much as $180,000 in water and maintenance costs over the next three years. The cemetery is the final resting place for cowboy stars Roy Rogers and Dale Evans

But how will Trigger continue to graze?

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 12, 2004 10:27 PM | Comments (1)  | QuickLink:

Friends Forever. Forever Friends.

Pour La Release Immediateness

DATELINE VERSAILLES: One day after Donald Rumsfeld made a surprise visit to Iraq, les tout France from Paris Nord to Versailles came to a halt to honor the surprise visit of Mrs. Teresa Heinz Kerry to this sleepy Parisian suburb and former home of the Ancien Regime (AKA "Kings and Queens of France").

Arriving on the personal jet that is not owned by her but by her family, Mrs. Teresa Heinz Kerry (or Mrs. Teresa Kerry-Heinz as she prefers to be known in Europe), was quick to make her way to Versailles II in order to sign the lease for her and her husband's forthcoming R&R retreat now scheduled from November 3, 2004 to January 31, 2005.

Teresa's sudden appearance in France marked the first time she has been away from the Campaign for the Presidency of the United States of America since Saturday. "The strain is just enormous," she remarked," especially that of being away from my friends here in France for so long, but the proprieties must be observed especially during the final weeks of this, how do you say?, 'debacle'?"

After a suitable luncheon consisting of a light salad, une morsel de fromage blanc, and six courses of white and red wine, Mrs. Kerry-Heinz took a tour of the villa which heretofore had been referred to under the code name 'Martha's Vineyard East.'

"You have to say something to all those little people without enough sense to either vote for my husband or let their children gambol about naked," Mrs. Kerry-Heinz quipped to the French press corps who had all donned giant poodle and corgi costumes in her honor.

Head chef of the French tourism and villa rental bureau, M. Jacques Chirac, was on hand to witness the historic signing of the lease for the Kerry-Heinz's Versailles II.*** "With all this stylish and historic moment," M. Chirac stated, "The grandeur of France's ever-deepening relationship with the Democratic Party is illuminated once again. I am looking forward to many strolls and romps in the grounds of Versailles II with Teresa, as well as a number of private and tender interludes with her recently worn shoes."

Before being wheeled back aboard her plane, Mrs. Kerry-Heinz told the entire nation of Kerry Supporters-Extraordinaire, "Les etat, c'est moi. I'm excited to be here and even more excited by your sensible attitude towards oil and catsup. I count the moments until we can be together. Au revoir, Lafayette."

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 11, 2004 5:49 PM | Comments (4)  | QuickLink:

For the chatty, ironic and oh-so-inside-baseball daily screed The Note to be without a chatty, ironic and inside item on ABC News' now infamous "Halperin Memo" is a serious disappointment. Especially since the foremost writer credited at ABC News: The Note: "Myopic Misread of the American Electorate" is Mr. Halperin himself.

Surely an organization that has "the skill and strength to help voters evaluate what the candidates are saying" (to quote from the memo) can use those same resources to explain and illuminate what sort of ideological bullet was scrambling Mr. Halperin's brain when he created the memo.

Since the Drudge revelation of last Friday many in the blogsphere (as well as the remnant of sensible souls in the mainstream media) have been united in their call for Mr. Halperin's gaping head at the tip of a spike. We dissent.

We do not feel Mr. Halperin should be sacked for fawning and tugging the forelock before the Kerry-Heinz fountain of future funding for books yet unwritten. To sack Mr. Halperin for that would mean that the terrorists of media tedium have won. Without these clueless examples of bias arising dependably from the media swamps of Manhattan, much of the blogsphere would sink back into the state of Live Journal from which it arose.

Under no circumstances should this unfortunate lad be fed to the Drudge-besotted hordes of the blogsphere for mere run-of-the-mill media bias.

No, he should be dismembered in the public square for being unable to write a coherent sentence.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 11, 2004 3:22 PM | Comments (2)  | QuickLink:

AFTER NINE DAYS on the road up Highway 1 and Highway 101, I've arrived in Seattle. They say the most ancient Chinese curse is "May you live in interesting times." A footnote to that would be, "May you live in an interesting city."

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 11, 2004 1:48 PM | Comments (2)  | QuickLink:

It's a sad, sad thing when you see people so deep in denial that not even a six-foot snorkel will bring them a breath of air. Witness uberblogger and Kerryista Mickey Klaus in his desperate attempt to help "President Kerry" weasel out of his "no-tax-increase-for-people-making-less-than-$200,000 pledge."

If I weren't such an ardent Kerry supporter I might note that Kerry's insta-pledge reflected a disastrous instinctive willingness to pander now and waffle later. ... P.S.: How will Kerry get out of it? First, he could say he was only talking about income taxes (though the pledge was "I am not going to raise taxes" in response to a question about the entire "tax burden," not just income taxes). Then he could blame his staff! -- Mickey Kaus

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 11, 2004 1:36 PM | Comments (3)  | QuickLink:

In case you failed to notice it, the United States has a new poet laureate, Ted Kooser. For once, this office seems to be filled by someone worthy of the honor. "What could possibly be wrong with a world in which everybody was trying to write poems?" Kooser said. "Is that not better than watching 'Survivor' or engaging in some sort of nefarious, stupid activity?" -- Omaha.com

Two by Kooser.

After Years

Today, from a distance, I saw you
walking away, and without a sound
the glittering face of a glacier
slid into the sea. An ancient oak
fell in the Cumberlands, holding only
a handful of leaves, and an old woman
scattering corn to her chickens looked up
for an instant. At the other side
of the galaxy, a star thirty-five times
the size of our own sun exploded
and vanished, leaving a small green spot
on the astronomer's retina
as he stood on the great open dome
of my heart with no one to tell.

==[*]==

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 11, 2004 11:30 AM | Comments (9)  | QuickLink:

Everyday thousands of folks show up at LILEKS for the latest installment of "The Bleat." They come thirsting for a screed but often leave dry. They hope for another incident in the unfolding life of the Gnat and are often delighted. Those that come for a note on the antics of Jasper are advised to pack a lunch and, as far as the Lilek's better half is concerned, that's none of your business.

I originally, years ago, came to Lileks for the "Tales of Fargo," a mythic place that comprised his boyhood and the summers of my boyhood. (If you haven't been through this section of the site and are interested in a fine take on one of the great good spaces in America, I commend it to you.) There are also some places in LileksLand that seem to have a lot to do with celery and panties, but if you've got those tendencies you can find them without any pointer from me except the assurance that they are tasty.

But what gets me about all of you "Bleataholics" is that you seem to ignore the one area where Lileks, James is working his guts out. I refer of course to The Matchbooks. You'd think a concerned readership would be more than eager to absorb a Herculean endeavor to roll the American universe into a ball and frame it with matchbooks, but noooooooo! Day after day, the links go up but the click-throughs just languish.

You must, I tell you, rouse yourself from your pastoral stupor and pay attention. The one on offer for today ( LILEKS (James) Matchbooks) notes: "the story of Dixie Belle gin is a true American tale, albeit a sad one: you can see the entire arc of the 20th century in this little matchbook." And he then proceeds to tell you why and how.

Just one more reason to send this man to the United States Senate.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 11, 2004 11:10 AM | Comments (5)  | QuickLink:

I've already forgotten what link took me there. I should have made a note of it and yet, as so often happens, I did not. There might be a trail of bread crumbs leading back through the labyrinth, but who has time to follow it. Suffice it to say that, from time to time, I come across a site, previously unknown to me, that strikes me as remarkable.

In the past, I've seldom pointed to these pages out of the feeling that "Such a fine site, surely tens of thousands of others must know about it." That's a common feeling that I know most share, but of late I've decided, "So what. It's new to me and that's what counts." From time to time, I'm going to point out one or two of these "New to Me" sites in the hope that what I value you might value too.

We begin today with: The Doctor Is In by Bob Finnerty a surgeon in Tacoma, WA. The "About Me" states:

The Doctor is In is a blog by a physician philosopher, dealing with medicine, religion, family, politics, current events, philosophy, pets, photography, the Pacific Northwest, software development, humor, and any other area of life worthy of passion and depth of consideration.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 11, 2004 10:21 AM | Comments (3)  | QuickLink:

Every election is, at some level, an exercise in bribing various elements of the electorate. One of the big bribes both parties are handing out this year involves cheaper prescription drugs. This plays mainly to the elderly and is an important bribe since the elderly tend to vote in large numbers and tend to vote their interests. One of those interests, if not the main one, is to be able to get drugs cheaper. The Bush contingent has a plan and a program and elements of that program in place. The Kerry contingent has a plan for everything and a program for nothing since most of the details of its plans are effectively "secret."

The electorate in need of cheaper drugs already has both a plan and a program in place to save it money. The elements of this plan are "Canada," "Mexico," and "UPS/FedEx." Bush says he opposes this plan because he does not believe it is "safe." Kerry opposes Bush and promises lower taxes all around and a National Health Plan that, it would seem, will be achieved through a replication of Christ's miracle of the loaves and fishes.

Pharmaceutical companies look at the Bush plan and worry about it. They look at the Kerry Plan and start to refurbish their offices in the Bahamas and study

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 11, 2004 8:51 AM | Comments (0)  | QuickLink:

I'm not at all sure which pagan religion my 10-year-old stepson belongs to. Perhaps it is the arcane cult of "Nintendoism" with its secret rites of "The High Priests of the Thumb". Perhaps he is an acolyte of "Transformerology," which evidently commands him to amass enough Legos to build a Romanesque Chapel in the corner of his room large enough for himself and two friends.

I am disturbed this unknown cult requires him to keep a graven image in his room that resembles a large square sponge with legs and a Satanic expression. From time to time, he is known to take trays of burnt offerings, in the form of charred circles of dough covered in melted cheese and a sauce as red as blood, into his room. The offering trays are later recovered, but there is no trace of the sacrifice, only vague stains of red on the sponge and rug beneath it.

I am not sure how or when he came by this religion. Perhaps he was converted during one of those dead of night gatherings known among his set as "sleep-overs." Sure, they sound innocent enough, but I am positive that these are covens at which much arcane and secret knowledge is transferred.

No matter what the source or nature of his unknowable religion, one thing is clear about the dangers of it. He has become convinced that there is such a thing as magic. My fear is that he may be right.

I suspect this because I have witnessed this dark magic at work in my own home.

One often seen magical incident is what I have come to know as "The Ritual of the Spirit Shoes." In this ritual, he discards his shoes at any place in the house in the sincere belief that they will appear lined up in pairs in his closet. This, you will be astonished to learn, is exactly what happens. They actually do appear in the closet within the next 24 hours. At times they even appear, if they sense they will be his choice of footwear for the day, next to the front door ready for his feet in a kind of reverse Cinderella moment.

I have come to understand that "The Ritual of the Spirit Shoes" is only one of

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 10, 2004 11:52 AM | Comments (1)  | QuickLink:

What are you reading this for when you could be going ZOOM?

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 10, 2004 1:51 AM | Comments (0)  | QuickLink:

I'm sorry but we have to locate the person who designed these airplane seats and put him in low solar orbit without a spacesuit ASAP:

"AIDA Development designed these "seats" to increase capacity on shorthaul flights. When leg room is not an issue, seats may be much closer together."

In: Aircraft interiors international, March 2004.

-- Futuristics : Commercial Aviation Transportation Gallery

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 10, 2004 1:36 AM | Comments (4)  | QuickLink:

What is it men in women do require
The lineaments of Gratified Desire

What is it women do in men require
The lineaments of Gratified Desire
--- William Blake

Although I am sure I am not the first man to have this insight, shortly after my daughter was born I remember holding her and nuzzling her then small and delicate head. The odor of a young baby is difficult to describe especially with a dusting of baby powder, but I recall thinking on more than one occasion that if a men's cologne company wanted to corner the market it would isolate and bottle the aroma. It could be marketed under the name "New Baby." I was sure the scent would prove to be irresistible to women.

Now Rickey James at the invaluable SciScoop reports that a scent emitted by one woman can stimulate desire in women around her. The catch is that she has to be breastfeeding.

From a monumentally important press release by the University of  Chicago:  Breastfeeding women and their infants produce a substance that increases sexual desire among other women, according to research at the University of Chicago.

"This is the first report in humans of a natural social chemosignal that increases sexual motivation," said Martha McClintock, the David Lee Shillinglaw Distinguished Service Professor in Psychology at the University, and the lead researcher in a team at the University's Institute for Mind and Biology. Chemosignals are substances that while not necessarily perceived as odors, nonetheless have an impact on mood and menstrual cycles when absorbed through the nose.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 10, 2004 12:23 AM | Comments (1)  | QuickLink:

Although I am sure I am not the first man to have this insight, shortly after my daughter was born I remember holding her and nuzzling her then small and delicate head. The odor of a young baby is difficult to describe especially with a dusting of baby powder, but I recall thinking on more than one occasion that if a men's cologne company wanted to corner the market it would isolate and bottle the aroma. It could be marketed under the name "New Baby." I was sure the scent would prove to be irresistible to women.

Now Rickey James at the invaluable SciScoop reports that a scent emitted by one woman can stimulate desire in women around her. The catch is that she has to be breastfeeding.

Not immediately useful, we still remain certain that manufactures of men's cologne will be drawn to this discovery like flies to honey. You can smell the profits from here.

From a monumentally important press release by the University of  Chicago:  Breastfeeding women and their infants produce a substance that increases sexual desire among other women, according to research at the University of Chicago.

"This is the first report in humans of a natural social chemosignal that increases sexual motivation," said Martha McClintock, the David Lee Shillinglaw Distinguished Service Professor in Psychology at the University, and the lead researcher in a team at the University's Institute for Mind and Biology. Chemosignals are substances that while not necessarily perceived as odors, nonetheless have an impact on mood and menstrual cycles when absorbed through the nose.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 9, 2004 5:01 PM | Comments (0)  | QuickLink:

"Moqadasa Sidiqi casts her vote for the landmark Afghan election in Islamabad October 9, 2004. The 19-year-old Afghan woman living as a refugee in Pakistan made history on Saturday by casting the first vote in Afghanistan's first direct presidential election."

=======

Same country, almost five years ago:

November 17, 1999

Who has made the real difference in destroying terrorism and tyranny in the last five years?

The man on the left or the man on the right?

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 9, 2004 5:41 AM | Comments (5)  | QuickLink:

"I got numerous individuals on the road. Do you want me to take those out?"
"Take 'em out."

"Oh, dude...." From Americandaughter.com:

U.S. Special Forces "Ninja" night stalkers on the ground in Fallujah during the night discovered a meeting at a protected mosque of followers of cleric Al-Sadyr. A mission to attack coalition forces with machine guns, rocket-propelled grenades, and road-side bombs was being planned by the insurgents in the mosque. The Special Forces Ninjas called in an air strike request to Air Force fighter jets and AWAC aircraft on patrol.

Video here:Missile Attack

Pointer via: Matthew Heidt @ Froggy Ruminations who notes:

I kind of doubt that a ground asset was involved in painting this band of miscreants, because the urban terrain would necessitate a position of sufficient height to allow for target identification and yet remain outside of the casualty radius of the munitions deployed (which was fairly significant). It probably was a TF-160 guy in an AH-6 "Little Bird" that called the shot.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 9, 2004 12:44 AM | Comments (7)  | QuickLink:

• A poor craftsman blames her inspiration.

The dreary case of Maria Alquilar's ugly and illiterate ceramic mural for the Livermore Library illustrates just how ignorant and untalented many American "artists" actually are.Ms. Alquilar's creation had everything that government committees value in today's public art, i.e., a huge chunk of diversity worship that excludes only beauty and inspiration seeking only to mollify and soothe. It is and, except for a few mistakes, would have remained a forgettable eyesore, noted only by pre-schoolers on a dubious field trip. The mistakes? For starters it couldn't spell "Shakespeare."

Ms. Alquilar 'created' a series of four dreadful but politically correct clay plaques that were, with some ceremony and a cost of $40,000, installed at the entrance of the new library in Livermore, California. Due to the joint failures of the primary, secondary, and collegiate educational systems in the United States, Ms. Alquilar managed to give "creative spellings" to such names as Einstein, Gauguin, Michelangelo, Shakespeare, and van Gogh. She also blew 'Kachinas' and 'Nefertiti,' along with a few others.

Neither Ms. Alquilar nor anyone else involved in the creation, fabrication, and installation spotted even one of the eleven mistakes. Result? They now grace the facade of a library, monuments to a culture that doesn't know, doesn't see, doesn't give a damn, and has no intention of putting things right. At least, that's Ms. Aquilar's current position:

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 8, 2004 11:51 PM | Comments (22)  | QuickLink:

Markos Zúniga: Disgrace to his country,
Disgrace to the Uniform of his country, and
now a disgrace to the Democratic Party.
No ethics. No honor. In it for the money.

Anyone with the barest notions of ethics and fair play has long since given up on the lifeform known as Kos. Still, it is entertaining to watch the degeneration continue. Here's the first post out of the door after tonight's

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 8, 2004 8:14 PM | Comments (7)  | QuickLink:

Yes, it is time to ruin the life of another great American.

Details here.

We're all agreed he gets to work from home, right? Right.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 7, 2004 5:48 PM | Comments (2)  | QuickLink:

Dedicated to Dinker and Bacchus

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 7, 2004 5:43 PM | Comments (1)  | QuickLink:

The ever insightful Marc Bowen over at Cobb has cracked the code! -- Cobb: The Speech John Kerry Will Never Make

There is a clear choice for Americans in November. War or Peace. President Bush is the choice for War and I am the choice for Peace.

It is a rare occasion when the American people have an opportunity to, with one vote, decide the fate of millions who are currently suffering the ravages of war. But now is that opportunity. This conflict in Iraq is the wrong war at the wrong time. We made a mistake going there and I am the man to correct that mistake. All the possible good that could possibly come from this war has already been accomplished and every minute we remain, we lose the advantage of those gains. There is nothing left to win in Iraq that America is capable of winning. Therefore, I pledge that if I am elected President, I will order the immediate and unconditional withdrawl of all American troops in Iraq.

My fellow Americans there can be no clearer choice before you. There may be a million reasons for going to war and we can debate those forever. There are equally a million reasons for ending war and those too can be debated forever. But when it comes down to it, for you the American voter, you only have one choice - War or Peace. I am here to make that choice crystal clear. Whatever your reasons, if you believe that we belong in Iraq, then cast your vote this election for George W. Bush. But, if you believe as I do that it is time for peace, then your choice is clear.

Vote for me. I will end the war.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 7, 2004 5:24 PM | Comments (2)  | QuickLink:

One of the downsides of contemporary capitalism (yes, there are a few) is the need to invent new "theories" of innovation and work along with genuine innovation. These usually take the form of books, seminars, and other grant-in-aid programs for the army of "consultants" that hover over the corporate landscape like trial lawyers and has-been celebrities hover over unexploited diseases.

The list of these sins is both, as a friend of mine likes to say, "numerous and multiple." One of my favorites was, if you have been conscious and semi-working since the early 1980s, a chunk of blather called "The One Minute Manager." A best-seller in its day and something that gave the author a big hit from the money machine, it has long since shuffled off its mortal coil. [In a way it worked for me as well since, as soon as I saw it on the best-seller list, I went right out and bought a manuscript for Houghton Mifflin called "The 59-Second Employee,"** which enjoyed a similar although smaller success.]

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 7, 2004 4:05 PM | Comments (4)  | QuickLink:

Isn't there anything new out there in terms of thinking about creativity? Creative thinking tools on the Web seem to always be popular. If only they weren't all so dated. A case in point would be:The Solution Machine On The Web.

The Vile (but Admired in New York) McSweeney's Sinks Even Lower with Zombie Gettysburg Address.

Fighting Lawsuit Abuse and Exposing Silly Lawsuits has enjoyed a boost in popularity in the last few days. I wonder why.

For those who care, this Deft Dual Evisceration of Louis Lapham and Dan Rather is a small masterpiece.

The Lunacy: Cummings is worried about the upsurge in cannibalism. And so say we all. Pass the salt.

Some people have juice and some people have not juice: Cheney Folks: Yay! Edwards Folks: Fey

A rant in the old style: Encouraging undecided voters to stay home, stay quiet, and stay celibate.

Exploding Pants. Alas,not Sandy Berger's ... speaking of which, whatever happened to that guy?

Official Results: 40% of people taking this CNN poll have no brain at all.

Demosophia argues that "the classically liberal (whig) perspective has been all but erased from three institutional realms: mainstream news media, the entertainment industry and academia. " The consequences are suitably dire.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 7, 2004 3:20 PM | Comments (0)  | QuickLink:

Kevin Kelly's -- Cool Tools is one of the most consistently interesting and useful sites around. He's just moved that up a notch with his new project that reviews the reviewers. And he's asking you for suggestions.

My model of the ideal review site then is one built on a broad base of user reviews, in addition to a field of experts conducting uniform and comparative reviews, and ends up with an extract of top picks or other recommendations of what to get. I have not yet seen a perfect site. What doesn't work for me is a site sporting a vast matrix of all products and their features, or a site recommending a few products --ones that they happen to also sell, or a site with evaluations of gear they happen to get free from cooperative manufacturers, or heaven forbid, a site that has a few feeble reviews and is supported by a zillion ads.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 7, 2004 2:47 PM | Comments (0)  | QuickLink:

BEST OF SHOW AT THE BANTERIST today is the latest in his series Grammar Cop.

Complaint: Abuse of the homophone "flair" - a misdemeanor, but not a hate crime; making error permanent by printing it on 80# card stock; placing error behind acrylic shielding so as to prevent correction; placing error in a high visibility location. Additional charges: Blather in the Second Degree in the form of a nonsensical paragraph; failure to capitalize "Asianesque" as required by law.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 7, 2004 2:30 PM | Comments (1)  | QuickLink:

Six Apart, known for its award-winning and innovative software used by webloggers around the world, announced today that it has received $10 million in Series B funding from August Capital. In addition, the company announced that August Capital partners David F. Marquardt, a member of the board of directors of Microsoft and Seagate Technologies, and David M. Hornik, a member of the board of directors of PayCycle and Nomis, have joined Six Apart's board of directors. Terms of the investment were not disclosed.

....In addition, the company has added depth to its management team, established Japanese and European subsidiaries, signed licensing agreements with systems integrator Hitachi, telecommunications leader NTT and ISP NIFTY and established a partnership with mobile leader Nokia. The company said the funds will be used for continued product development, international expansion, increased customer support and sales and marketing initiatives.

....August Capital joins Neoteny as an investor in Six Apart. Neoteny,[Joi Ito] a Japanese venture capital firm focused on the rapidly expanding realm of the networked computer, led the company's Series A round.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 7, 2004 2:10 PM | Comments (0)  | QuickLink:

AP

Sometimes I have to wonder if this civilization really is worth saving.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 7, 2004 1:57 PM | Comments (3)  | QuickLink:

Who says there are no good candidates?This stunningly obvious but still brilliant idea just in from Flatlander: "I think we start a movement to draft the Dean of MN bloggers, James Lileks. I know he'll say he doesn't want the job, family, work, blah, blah. But, he's the guy I think is right for the job of representing Minnesota right now." -- FLATLANDER

Now before you laugh and before you scoff and before you run out of the room with your teeth on fire screaming, "I GOT THE FEAR!," just sit back and reflect on the dead-center obvious nature of this very smart idea.

And the timing is right. Plus we've already got the bumper sticker and the lawn sign. Now all we need is to get cracking and whip up some tee shirts.

He'll scream, he'll squirm, he'll twist slowly in the wind, but if there's going to be a draft in the country, I'll take a "Draft Lileks" draft over the other kind.

Lileks will, sadly, have to divest himself of his Tiki-Torches and it could be that his positions on many issues are a bit too explicit for the tastes of many... but, but.... well, it is just too juicy a shot to pass up. Electing a Senator out of the blogsphere would be the ultimate announcement that this medium has arrived, wouldn't it.

And if, perchance, Lileks bleats, "It is to dream the impossible dream," we'll just sit him down in front of Lawrence of Arabia for the line: "We are here. Akaba is there. It is only a matter of going."

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 6, 2004 7:04 PM | Comments (20)  | QuickLink:

There are so many moments and passages that illuminate and inspire in Bill Whittle's long essay, "DETERRENCE" at Eject! Eject! Eject!, that the only reasonable thing to do is to just point you towards it.

In case you feel you really don't have the time take in this small excerpt and see if you still feel that way.

Ladies, President Bush has freed the women of Afghanistan, and shut down the state-run rape and torture of women in Iraq. And for every one of those women who was raped and tortured to death, remember that half the entire country lived in daily fear of being spotted by some Ba’athist pig with too much time on his hands as he hid behind the tinted windows of his limousine, cruising the streets of Baghdad or Mosul or Basrah looking for a little fun.

Senator Kerry, on the other hand, has not only said, he has promised that he will do no such thing.

SENATOR KERRY: But we also have to be smart, Jim. And smart means not diverting your attention from the real war on terror in Afghanistan against Osama bin Laden and taking if off to Iraq where the 9/11 Commission confirms there was no connection to 9/11 itself and Saddam Hussein, and where the reason for going to war was weapons of mass destruction, not the removal of Saddam Hussein.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 6, 2004 1:27 PM | Comments (4)  | QuickLink:

This just in from the excellent L.A. Observed

Sacramento Bee opinion blogger Dan Weintraub passes along two new polls that pick up a slide in Kerry's lead over Bush among California voters. In one, the Democrat's edge is down to six points. Regardless of position, Californians are not subscribers to the belief that the country is split roughly even. They feel, by more than 2 to 1, that Bush will win. On a somewhat similar note, right-leaning columnist Jill Stewart tries to make the case in a recent piece that California is not so liberal.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 6, 2004 12:27 PM | Comments (0)  | QuickLink:

At the beginning of last December, after hearing Emimem rap out "I'd rather see the president dead," I wrote a short commentary, Where Bush Hate is Heading, which observed:

As Americans, we assume that the terrorist enemies of our country would like nothing better than to assassinate the President of the United States. We can only hope that the Secret Service and all those entrusted with his protection have taken extraordinary precautions to protect him and prevent such an event from ever taking place.

Even so, as we have learned several times in my lifetime, no security arrangements are flawless, and while you can protect rationally against rational threats, the game can fall apart when you are dealing with people who are manifestly insane and do not need to live.

We expect our enemies to hate the President and to seek to do him harm. We do not expect members of the loyal opposition to allow their rhetoric and their "cultural standard bearers" such as Eminem ("I set precedents and the standards...") to poison the political system to the level that some of their misguided ilk take it upon themselves to take a shot at Bush "for the sake of the greater good."

Yet Bush hate is leading is to that point. It may be that we get through the next year without seeing the headline: BUSH KILLED. I pray that it is so. At the same time, would you be surprised?

The small article linked above drew more than its share of comments at the time but then, as these things do, the comments trailed off. Until this morning when I was greeted by these sentiments in the comments section:

bush deserves to die, he's personally responsable for the deaths of over 1000 americans, countless civilian iraqies, all for what, a reason that makes no sense, so we should just let him live out the rest of his life while familys suffer from death , the destruction of there homes, billions of dollars wasted on a war we should of never had, he's an idiot and is responsable for the murder of thousands...he deserves at least to die himself

To wit, if there are people among us so sodden with the hate of the Republican President that they are willing to wish death upon him -- here and on our stage and in our books and elsewhere in the culture -- what will they be willing to do on the day after their certain defeat at the polls next month?

As in so many things, the proof of the strength of our Republic and our democratic system will be shown not on the day of the election, but on the days that come after.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 6, 2004 11:01 AM | Comments (17)  | QuickLink:

Went to a fortune teller to have my fortune read.
I didn’t know what to tell her. I had a dizzy feeling in my head

In October of the year 2000, when I lived in Brooklyn Heights and worked in Manhattan, there was a fortune teller who ran a storefront operation just around the corner on Montague Street. Her face was stained walnut with deep wrinkles framing jet black eyes. Her hands, when they flickered out from underneath her black shawl, were gnarled knots. From noon until late into the evening she sat in front of her shop and watched what there was of the world on this street flow by.

Every morning as I strolled to the subway I'd pass her window, two steps down with a red neon hand glowing palm out behind the dusty glass. An Abyssinian cat drowsed on the sill inside the glass and the thick curtains were still drawn. She lived in a room at the back of the shop. No windows, no fire escape. Maybe a hot plate. The police and fire marshals never seemed to bother about this. She'd always been there. A fixture as fixed and unmoving as the fire hydrant in front.

Every evening I'd pass the fortune teller's again on my way home. Inside the room you could see two chairs and a table with tarot decks and a crystal ball, the tools of this ancient trade. The fortune teller was a woman of the Romany race, as these folks usually are in New York and elsewhere. In New York, the gypsies run the Fortune industry at the same level of market penetration that the Greeks run the coffee shop conglomerate and the Italians waste disposal -- 99.99% It's an ancient business and although I never patronized them, I knew plenty of people who did, mostly women with man trouble.

But what if I had? What if one evening in the year 2000 I'd stopped and instead of vaguely nodding to the old woman in the long flowered dress and fringed shawl, gone inside, sat down and said, "Okay, 'deal me up a brand new future from a worn out deck of cards'?"

And what if she had drawn the curtains, lit the candles and incense, and told me this?

"I see you four years from now, in October 2004."

"Okay, that's a relief. I'm alive in 2004. Where am I, what am I doing?"

"I can tell you but I fear you will not believe me. Pay me $100 now."

"What's not to believe? Here you go. You're paid, now tell me."

"Very well, but remember, you have asked.

"In four years, you will be remarried."

"I suppose that could happen even though I currently think of marriage as being just below do-it-yourself brain surgery on my to-do list..."

"Do not interrupt... in four years, remarried and in love with a woman who has a son of ten years. He plays chess remarkably well and likes to sneak up behind you and batter you about the head and shoulders with a foam bat.

"In four years, this city you love will be far away and struggling to rise from a terrible day that leaves it covered in ash and with thousands of dead. You will not be with them. You will live in a place where almost every day is like the few fine days you get here.

"In four years, your country will have conquered two other countries on the far side of the world and will be fighting for its future in many other lands and fearful of more days of fire at home. This will be a fear founded on fact.

"When this war begins there will be a great rage in the land over the enemies that killed thousands of your fellow Americans at their desks on a fine, clear morning. But in four years there will be a greater rage in the land between the citizens. One side will want to continue the struggle until your enemies are defeated. The other side will wish to end the struggle as quickly as possible and return to the sleep that they enjoyed so much in the years gone by."

"Excuse me, but I am really having trouble believing that President Gore would allow..."

"Silence!

"In four years, you will find yourself in a large room high above the Pacific. You will be watch two men debate the great issues of the election before you on television.

"One man will be old and hulking. He will be bald and tired with the weight of years. He will have the hard look in his eyes that men get when they do hard things and know harder things loom ahead. He will epitomize all that you have always voted against and will vote against in this year's elections.

"Opposing him will be a young and handsome man; a man whose demeanor and hair will remind you the Jack Kennedy you so admired in your youth. He will have charm and a scintillating smile. He will tell you stories of his own youth and remind you that he sees the 'candle of liberty' flickering in America. He will promise much that would benefit all -- not in the least free doctors all around and on the house.

"And.... and.... and this is the hard part."

"Go on. Tell me."

"You will know, in your heart, that the man who would be Kennedy is telling you a lie of the soul; that he and the man who seeks office with him have no plan for the country beyond their own cheap ambitions.

"You will, on that night four years from now, know that the old and grumpy man, the man with the failing heart, represents the only way forward. You will be ready at long last to do the thing that you have never done before."

"No. No! Not that!"

"Yes my son, you will vote for a Republican."

"But, but, how did this come to be? How did all this come to pass?"

"That will be another $100."

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 6, 2004 9:04 AM | Comments (4)  | QuickLink:

Paper. Scissors. Escher.

An amazing confluence of two strange sensibilities.

And what is Origamic Architecture?

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 5, 2004 11:59 PM | Comments (0)  | QuickLink:

Vel Satis: A car of this type rests as from spirit hand over the motorway

Okay, know going in that this story is going to cause your brain to curdle. You've got French technology, French manufacturing, and a French driver all going wildly, terribly wrong. On top of that you have a not-ready-for-prime-time Google translation from German to English. It's going to be a rough ride, but once you get into the spirit of the thing it just sort of skips along.

To set the scene: You have a cutting-edge French car with "smart" technology that takes so many little, irritating tasks away from the driver. You know, little things like air conditioningl, seat adjustment, radio tuning, control over acceleration, braking, and the ability to shut the whole thing down. Add in a wide open road and what do you have? Terror on the tarmac!

[Text verbatim, but cut -- out of respect for our shared humanity.]

It was worse than a nightmare: A normal route on the motorway. To be stopped suddenly will the car ever faster, is no more.

Well one hour long hunted a French driver with speed 200 over the runway, in the Slalom around the other cars. ...

It has a truck overhauled, when its car accelerated suddenly independently on 190 kilometers per hour, quoted the French daily paper "Le Parisien" the driver Hicham Dequiedt on Tuesday:

"It was impossible to drive more slowly. On the brake to step, nothing proved functioned. as useless. " ....

A cause for the Horrortrip was a electronics error in the vehicle: the Tempomat of its Renault Vel Satis was defective. The ignition to switch off is not possibly been, since the car has a smart card instead of a key....

The police certified Dequiedt a "admirable behavior": "you discussed solution types at the telephone with me." The officials let a Mautstelle on his distance vacate, all barriers were eliminated and fire-brigade and ambulance alarmed as a precaution.

"I stood, said the fear of my life. It became dangerous, when before it a truck on the left trace overhauled another vehicle. It could change over only to the standing tire. "I thought, my last Stuendlein struck."

Only after approximately one hour and 200 kilometers he could finally bring the cars to holding. "I stepped as firmly, as I could, on the brakes, and the car came finally to a halt."

The pressestelle of the manufacturer Renault confirmed the incident, which occurred on Sunday. "The car is examined for the moment in France", said spokeswoman Caroline Sambale. To the causes she can say to still nothing for the moment. ....

The model Vel Satis is steered via the smart card: Door locks open automatically, as soon as the driver equipped with the map, whom grasp affects.

Preferences of the driver such as air conditioning system and seat position, in addition, vehicle-relevant data such as maintenance dates are stored on the smart card. As soon as the driver puts it into the reader in the center console, going away barrier and steering column bolting device are solved.

The driver must operate then an asynchronous operation button, in order to start the engine.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 5, 2004 10:28 PM | Comments (7)  | QuickLink:

"The most technologically efficient machine that man has ever
invented is the book." --Northrop Frye

Let's review:

• No "advanced" technology required. Ability to manufacture present in all areas of the globe.


• Crude but functioning units can be made by kindergartners with pencil, paper and glue.


• Operating system and interface rock solid.


• All types of information can be stored.


• Has been proven to retain information in retrievable form across several thousand years.


• Of the two, the User will often crash first.


• All parts can be recycled.


• All or part can be backed-up at any Kinkos.


• Can be powered for hours with one candle.


• All users receive up to 12 years of interface training free.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 5, 2004 9:53 PM | Comments (4)  | QuickLink:

For reasons other than those I proposed in Yes, Virginia, There WILL Be a Draft, David Hackworth also sees a draft in '05 or '06: Uncle Sam Will Soon Want Your Kids

Right now -- with both our regular and Reserve soldiers stretched beyond the breaking point -- our all-volunteer force is tapping out. If our overseas troop commitments continue at the present rate or climb higher, there won't be enough Army and Marine grunts to do the job. And thin, overworked units, from Special Forces teams to infantry battalions, lose fights.

Clearly, this war against worldwide, hardcore Islamic believers will be a massive military marathon, the longest and most far-flung in our country's history. By Christmas, more troops could be needed not only in Iraq and Afghanistan, but wherever the radical Islamic movement is growing stronger, from the Horn of Africa to Morocco, Kenya, Somalia, Yemen and across Europe -- remember Spain?! -- to Asia.

Accordingly, we need to bring our ground-fighting and support units to about the strength they were before the Soviet Union imploded, especially since the proper ratio of counterinsurgent-to-insurgent in places like the Middle East should be around 15 to 1. You don't have to be a Ph.D. in military personnel to conclude we need more boots on the ground.

Where I diverge from Hackworth's position is in his insistence that, no matter what, increasing military needs in numerous other countries will stimulate this situation.

It's obvious that a Kerry administration would initiate an across the board pull-back from foreign adventures to something like the Sept. 10 status-quo-ante of troop deployment. What is not so obvious is that a continuing Bush Administration might be far too gun-shy to expand operations outside of Iraq but look to consolidate and control that country alone. This is not entirely unwise from a strategic and tactical perspective since it allows the US to keep Saudi Arabia, Syria, and Iran in check and to checkmate them if the need arises.

In neither case do we see the overwhelming need for a draft. In the first, we simply regroup and make a lot of members of the National Guard feel happy and safe -- for a while. In the latter case, we muddle through with the forces on hand.

What changes the equation above is, as I argue in the article linked above, a second devastating attack on the United States homeland with large numbers of American men, women and (especially) children killed.

In that case, Hackworth's draft comes about by default. Right after a very large surge in enlistments.

Then again we might see a surge in the oft-cited but now vanished "Kerry Peace-Corpesque Civilian Corps," since a large job on the global scale would involve decontaminating highly irradiated sites in the Middle-East.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 5, 2004 11:06 AM | Comments (9)  | QuickLink:

YOU THERE! Yes, you!

You might think that in your happy little world you can at least control and hold onto your pointing and clicking CURSOR, right?

Well, you are DEAD WRONG!

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 4, 2004 9:45 PM | Comments (2)  | QuickLink:

Simpson, faced with cancellation, starts endorsement career

The bad news for its millions of fans around the world is that it looks like the end is in sight. The overall impression from a day spent with some of the sprawling team of producers, writers, animators and voice talent that make the show is that the goal is to reach 20 seasons, which would take it to 2009 in the States. The series would then overtake Gunsmoke as the longest running entertainment show on US television with its place in history assured.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 4, 2004 9:26 PM | Comments (1)  | QuickLink:

SPENGLER on why things will get worse for western Muslims before they get better... if then.

NOSEBLEEDS POSTPONED: Coast Guard pulls over two fishing boats. Canned tuna in the galley, 27 tons of cocaine in the hold.

PHONE HOME: Beslan Killers phone in the massacre to the Middle East.

KERRY FUTURES MARKET continues to tank.

DAN RATHER'S FUTURE continues to tank. [Quicktime movie]

SEX IN OUTER SPACE? It could happen.

COCA COLA'S FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE: by N. C. Wyeth

HOW TO UPGRADE your organic dog. Plus pix from poochCam.

YOU DON'T WANT TO SEE THE NEW, IMPROVED LIVE DEMO: HOOD, balloon detonation at 1500', 74 kilotons, July 1957

HOW TO GRILL A MAN, THE VIDEO by the aptly named "Slowtron."

WE CAN MUMMIFY YOU: Upfront costs, $67,000 plus Mummiform or traditional casket costs, but why skimp on the last thing you'll ever buy?

EVERYBODY'S DOING IT, BUT EVERYBODY... Official Frank Serpico Blog

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 4, 2004 6:53 PM | Comments (1)  | QuickLink:

HOW MUCH BANDWIDTH does one "transformed" military establishment need? Lots evidently according to this report from DefenseLink.

DISA experts project an eight-fold increase in bandwidth requirements between 2006 and 2015, or a jump from 20 gigabits to 160 gigabits. And normally, Raduege said, projected estimates fall short.

A gigabit refers to 1 billion bits of data, and bandwidth is the amount of data that can be transmitted in a set amount of time, usually expressed as bits per second. So to put it in perspective, in 2006, DISA experts expect to need to be able to transfer 20 billion bits of data per second.

Steps are being taken to address the need for increasing bandwidth.

"The (Global Information Grid)-Bandwidth Expansion will be the newest terrestrial component of the GIG," Raduege said. "This GIG-BE is designed to be robust enough to eliminate current and future bandwidth constraints.

"GIG-BE's advanced fiber-optic backbone and switching technology will upgrade

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 4, 2004 11:01 AM | Comments (1)  | QuickLink:

Going on 40 years of demonstrations. What a difference a few decades make. Or do they?

Here's a photograph taken during a protest for the Free Speech Movement at the University of California in Berkeley in December of 1964.

Nearly 40 years ago. I suppose that if it was taken on the right day in December at the right time, I'm floating around somewhere nearby just outside the frame. I'm probably trying to make a sign that's anywhere as cool as, "STRIKE AGAINST THE PATRIARCHAL DESPOTISM AND MARTIAL LAW USED IN DEFENSE OF PERSONAL MORAL WEAKNESS," but I've really got no chance. That guy is just too, too SDS for me. I'd have never come up with it. Still, you have to admire his foresight. He's got "patriarchal" up there a full decade before it was even a gleam in Andrea Dworkin's eye.

I've been looking at a lot of old photographs of late and I always wonder where the people in the picture are today. I know where I am and it is much more than 40 years . I like to imagine it is the same for the sign-toting student in the shot. But you just can't know.

The other thing that strikes me is how, as my father would have said, "clean-cut" everybody is. Suits, ties, "ivy-league" haircuts, polished shoes. Nobody wears things like that to demonstrations today, not even the FBI Agents.

Of course the slightly scruffy couple harmonizing folk songs over a guitar in the background near the middle of the shot are still around. They don't seem to ever age, do they? I wonder what their secret is?

Last summer I had to take my car in for repair at one of the Mercedes repair shops that line one side of the road up Laguna Canyon from the ocean to the interior of Orange county. Dropping it off I took a little stroll around the automobile graveyard that forms a part of this mechanic's lot. And there it was: my past come back to haunt me like a Maoist version of Marley's Ghost.

I'm not saying I owned this vehicle, but a lot of my friends did. I'm not saying this was one of theirs, but it sure could have been. And I'm not asserting that

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 2, 2004 5:22 PM | Comments (4)  | QuickLink:

MEAT SHAKE®, the franchise that takes the Atkins Diet up to levels previously undreamed of, has developed a line of

Celeb Specialty Shakes

Ricky's "Liver La Vida Loca" Shake
(Liver, Anchoivies, Avocados, Salsa)
Lars' "Mutton Else Matters" Shake
(Lamb, Cabbage, Tomatos, Honey Mustard)
Mel & Arnold's "Use the Schwartz" Shake
(Austrian Brautwurst, Sauerkraut, Creatine)
P.B. Wolf 's "Who Remixed Roger Rabbit?" Shake
(Welsh Rabbit, Mixed Greens, Carrots, Vinagerette)
Danny A's "Old-School Bassomatic" Shake
(Whole Uncooked Bass, Chocolate Chips, Vanilla Soft Serve)
Henson's "It Ain't Easy Being Green" Shake
(Boneless Frog Legs, Butter, Fresh Mint)

I know. I think these un-American thoughts too.

My shame is that I actually know close friends who would, given the opportunity, not only patronize MEAT SHAKE®, but seek to buy a franchise.

Posted by Vanderleun Oct 1, 2004 7:51 AM | Comments (2)  | QuickLink: