September 17, 2007

O...kay, that's it with the Web for today.

beauty-bum.jpgCertain things come to your attention that, after they arrive, you wish they would leave. We'll file this one under: Once the Botox Needle Goes In, It Never Comes Out:

I was in L.A. recently with a group of friends, devouring pommes frites and red wine, when someone blurted out, "You know, Suzanne had this horrible reaction when she had her anus bleached and had to go to the emergency room." Yes, I know, I'm speechless, too (mostly because my mother-in-law will read this). I assumed this ritual was for dealing with a parasite. But no, Suzanne was given the treatment as a gift from the movie star who employed her.....


Apparently, plenty of women want to go past the now-ordinary breast enhancement and pubic electrolysis to a place few have heretofore dared to go in the name of beauty. Much to my ignorance, bleaching one's anus (I guess to bring it back to its budlike, puckish pink) has become an obsession far beyond the young jet set and the detail-oriented gay community. These days, anal-bleaching creams can be purchased as easily as cough drops. Let's see ... next Mother's Day, should I go with the balloon bouquet or a gift certificate for total rectal beauty? -- Anal Bleaching and Other Cosmetic Surgeries - Marie Claire

UPDATE: Well, now it is really over with the Web and I for today. This item (from W via Tim Blair via Ninme) seems to make have some connection with the bleached anus.. something about a bleached set of values of the rich and effluent:

Green before it was hip—[Cate Blanchett] cites Al Gore and David de Rothschild as heroes and believes that leaf blowers "sum up everything that is wrong with the human race"—the couple are trying to make the ecological footprint of the home as small as possible, installing solar panels and even a filtration system that will allow them to drink their own wastewater. She plans to cook a lot --
But not, I trust with "their own wastewater." Then again...

cateblanch.jpg
Cate Blanchett in an unguarded moment savoring her own wasterwater.... But does she bleach?

UPDATE II: And this time I really mean it when I say it is over between the Web and I for today: Surgeons remove gallbladder through vagina

French surgeons took out a patient's gallbladder without cutting her abdomen, removing it through an incision in her vagina in what they said was a glimpse of the future of surgery, they reported on Monday.
Oh, those mad mad Frenchies. First they donate to civilization through the perfection of the croissent, and now they achieve the heights of medical mastery through the perfection of the reverse French kiss with tongs. Sacre blu! [HT: Ace, who should be ashamed of himself for spreading this sort of thing around.]

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Posted by Vanderleun at September 17, 2007 9:57 AM | TrackBack
Comments:

AMERICAN DIGEST HOME
"It is impossible to speak in such a way that you cannot be misunderstood." -- Karl Popper N.B.: Comments are moderated and may not appear immediately. Comments that exceed the obscenity or stupidity limits will be either edited or expunged.

I couldn't help but notice that at the... ahem... bottom of the page about anal bleaching, there was an item entitled: "Hillary Clinton unplugged."

I think I jes trew up in my mouf a wittle.

Posted by: rogerdehauteville at September 17, 2007 10:18 AM

Sarah Silverman actually did a bit about this on some roast.
I need to find the Youtube link.

Posted by: mb at September 17, 2007 10:27 AM

I'm gonna hurl

BLEACHING YOUR BUTTHOLE??!!

We're a pathetic species.

Posted by: locomotivebreath1901 at September 17, 2007 3:06 PM

Gerald, fergawdssake, I don't wish ill on anyone but I hope something news worthy happens tomorrow so you can blog about Iran or Syria or Nancy friggin Pelosi, insetad of Cate Blanchett's new cooking techniques.

Posted by: Jim in Virginia at September 17, 2007 6:10 PM

...believes that leaf blowers "sum up everything that is wrong with the human race"

Well, yeah, my neighbor's leaf blower is one of the banes of my existence. It's ungodly loud.

On the other hand, after I've used my weed-whacker and gone inside to take a break, I went back outside to find that he used it to clean up the clippings, thus saving me from having to clean them up manually with a broom and dustpan. So it's a mixed blessing.

Posted by: rickl at September 17, 2007 6:48 PM

That IS the problem with the internet as an information transmission medium. Some information doesn't need to be shared.
(My greatest fear is that Flash Player will catch up with all of this before I die. Brings a whole new meaning to "I like to watch".)

Posted by: ed in texas at September 18, 2007 5:15 AM

I heard about the vaginal entry gall bladder removal technique a while ago. It shows that sometimes it pays to think inside the box.

Posted by: Alan Kellogg at September 18, 2007 10:56 AM

I was once so disgusted with John Edwards that I contemplated yanking out his gall bladder through the vagina.

Posted by: Gagdad Bob at September 18, 2007 12:11 PM

I always wanted to be a Bleach Bum.

Posted by: rexrs at September 18, 2007 3:13 PM

Are you bored?

Posted by: Webutante at September 19, 2007 7:18 AM

Let me restate the question: Have the past few days been anuus horriblis for you?

Posted by: Webutante at September 19, 2007 8:16 AM

A bleached butt-hole is still a butt-hole and the butt-hole still belongs to a butt-hole.

Posted by: ChiefTest Pilot at September 19, 2007 4:18 PM

I thought a old white a-hole was an Imus, not an anus.

Posted by: Gagdad Bob at September 23, 2007 6:56 AM

I thought an old white a-hole was an Imus, not an anus.

Posted by: Gagdad Bob at September 23, 2007 6:57 AM
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