"Your iPod's glaring whiteness is relaying signals back to the humans. Protect yourself from harmful rays in style with this hand-crafted hip cozy made of (possibly) organic felt.
...and don't forget to dress it up with a Welcome Squid Overlords shirt." Ur.... Okay, anything you say.
"Unlike Bollywood for the Skeptical, this mix will probably not make you twice as cool as you are now. lord knows there's a limited quotient of cool left on this good earth and much of it can be found keepin' it real in coltrane's tomb."
The MicroGuy in charge says: We heard a clear message: "Yes, XP SP2 makes the situation better. We want more, sooner. We want security on top of the compatibility and extensibility IE gives us, and we want it on XP. Microsoft, show us your commitment.”" Translation: Show us the MONEY! You guys are hosed for another decade, suckers.