WHEN in the course of human Events, it becomes necessary….
Let’s Review 128: Mormon Pencils and Moths of Beauty
byVanderleunonOctober 12, 2018
The LDS Church Uses Pencils – I was in the temple* yesterday and it occurred to me that we were still using pencils and paper. To get in, we show a piece of paper; to participate in an ordinance, we use a piece of paper; when the ordinance is complete, we show that with a red checkmark from a pencil. I think there are a few reasons for this. 1) There isn’t anything distracting about a piece of paper and a pencil. This allows focus to be placed elsewhere, while still ensuring accurate record keeping. 2) There are few points of failure in the system. If the paper arrives at the recorders desk with a red check mark, then it is recorded as complete. If not, then it isn’t. Paper also never runs out of batteries. 3) If a failure does happen, it is obvious. If a patron proceeds through the ceremony, it will quickly be apparent if they don’t have the paper, in which case the ceremony can’t be completed for them. There isn’t any ambiguity, it provides a binary situation of success/failure. 4) There is no delay in transmission. It is as fast as reading what is on the paper and verifying the check mark.
Why fake miniatures depicting Islamic science are everywhereBesides the colours being a bit too vivid, and the brushstrokes a little too clean, what perturbed me were the telescopes. The telescope was known in the Middle East after Galileo developed it in the 17th century, but almost no illustrations or miniatures ever depicted such an object. When I tracked down the full image, two more figures emerged: one also looking through a telescope, while the other jotted down notes while his handspun a globe – another instrument that was rarely drawn. The starkest contradiction, however, was the quill in the fourth figure’s hand. Middle Eastern scholars had always used reed pens to write. By now there was no denying it: the cover illustration was a modern-day forgery, masquerading as a medieval illustration.
California’s Almond Harvest Has Created a Golden Opportunity for Bee Thieves – “What we had here was a chop shop, but of beehives,” Torres said. “You had some beehives that were alive, and you had some hives that were dead. You had hives that were basically cut up: Tops of boxes were over here on this side of the field, and the other parts of the box are on the other side.”
The Horseshoe Schweska began with an old-school steak platter: a steel oval plate surrounded by an iron or wood trivet (the raised border served as an important spud balcony). On top, he placed two pieces of bread, lying side by side, and a slice of ham cut directly from the bone in the shape of a horseshoe. Then came his iconic cheese sauce. Although it was based off Welsh rarebit sauce — which uses cheddar cheese, milk, butter, and beer — because it was 1928, and therefore during Prohibition, Schweska made his first Horseshoe sauce using nonalcoholic beer. After a good smother of creamy liquified cheese, the chef decorated the platterâs perimeter with freshly cut baked potato wedges, creating the “nails” of the horse’s shoe.
HOW? – Birds Aren’t Real It is imperative that we discuss the methods that the government used to extinguish over 12 billion birds between 1959 and 1971. If we are to make disciples of the birds aren’t real movement, we must equip each and every person with the knowledge of what truly happened in this saga of insanity and government corruption. Here are the facts and eyewitness accounts of various key events that occurred within our nation that completely destroyed every man woman and child bird in existence.
Mitchell Domes @ Milwaukee, Wisconsin The botanical garden holds over 1,000 different plant species, with each of the three domes displaying a different theme: the Tropical Dome, the Desert (Arid) Dome, and a floral Show Dome with rotating seasonal or holiday displays. The unique design of the glass orbs allows 85 percent of available light to transmit to the plants, and large fans are used to draw out heat in the summer so the domes donât overheat. The aluminum tubing on the structures expands and contracts along with the temperature, and visitors can hear it clicking as they walk through the gardens.
Is it weird that i kinda like that cap gun after-bang smell?
Dr. JayOctober 12, 2018, 11:59 AM
Dear Joyful,
Yes.
Joyfully yours,
Dr. Jay
KerryOctober 12, 2018, 11:59 AM
I like the smell, too, Joyful. Haven’t smelled it since childhood when my brothers had those cap guns laying around the house. I also like the smell of gasoline. Weird? Not by today’s standards! You have to go way, way out there on the fringe today for folks to label a personal preference weird.
I just smelled that nostalgic cap smell yesterday. I bought my grandson 5 packages of 10 rolls each of caps and the cap gun for his birthday.
ghostsniperOctober 12, 2018, 1:30 PM
One?
We had em all over the house. Got em for christmas, birthdays, all the time. Usually no caps though. sniff Caps didn’t last long in a house with 3 boys and 2 tom-girls. Specially when you took a whole roll and set it on the sidewalk and slammed a baseball bat down on it vertically. whoa
That center xray has a camel toe.
My mother says it was the damdest thing, I was born with a pencil in my hand.
Doctor never seen that before or since.
If I get a terminal disease I’m gonna sit on the porch with a sketch pad and pencil and draw everything that comes to mind, then my wife is going to assemble it into a coffee table book titled, “Dead Man Sketching”. Watch for it on amazon, $19.99, large format.
Done properly, french fries don’t need nothing else cept salt.
“…insanity and government corruption.”
sigh, Twas it ever not?
Ever notice how moths look like flowers?
Yeah, me neither.
azlibertarianOctober 12, 2018, 2:16 PM
“Who had one?”
The better question is: “Who didn’t?”
Schill McGuffinOctober 12, 2018, 2:54 PM
Definitely had a lot of roll cap guns in my time and noted that as they came to be more and more cheaply made through the 1970s they became nearly non-functional, even when new. The feed mechanisms came to be made out of flimsy sheet metal, prone to bunching up the paper strip instead of feeding it. The problem was exacerbated by the body of the gun being made of molded plastic instead of the sturdier cast metal of the classic “Peacemaker” shown.
I remember ring caps as gradually replacing them, with the advantage of being much louder, albeit more expensive, though gradually those got loused up by cheap construction too — a plastic hammer doesn’t have enough heft to set off any cap properly. I do still fondly remember a solid metal detective snubnose that I actually brought to school to use as a prop in a play (you’d probably end up doing 3-5 in the state pen for that today). Also a wonderful replica Colt Dragoon that my grandmother bought in Spain, which fired plastic caps just like the percussion ones on the original.
And new tires. Another heavenly smell.
I never tried the baseball bat thing, We always took a roll of caps, doubled it over, and squeezed it in a pair of channel lock pliers. Bang the back of the pliers on the sidewalk. Ears would ring for minutes afterwords. Probably why I can’t hear shit, now.
OK, the “Birds Aren’t Real” thing.
Usually I get dry humor.
But I really couldn’t tell.
What is that?
JWM
Snakepit KansasOctober 12, 2018, 6:04 PM
Ghost,
Funny, but I draw and doodle all the time. People at work frequently want to see what I drew. The longer and more irrelevant (to me) a meeting gets, the more I doodle in my notebook. I switched from pencil to pen as you are well aware that engineering notation requires black pen.
I recently pulled out some of my pencil drawings from more than 25 years ago to show my two monkeys. Their mother is more artistically talented than me and they just need a few pointers to making fantastic drawings. I have one specific drawing from an old Victoria Secret catalog that is my favorite. I might finally get it framed. I picked it due to sheer contrast and unnatural beauty. Jill Goodacre. Mercy.
Sam L.October 12, 2018, 8:03 PM
I used to have one much like that cap pistol. More than one, actually.
CaseyOctober 13, 2018, 4:24 AM
Cameltoe? Obviously you live in free land, Ghostie. Say that shit in the city and harpy wrath ensues.
I live in free land, too. But, in a patch of bad luck I am sitting in NYC, avoiding wimmin. All intercourse with females is subject to rape scrutiny, in Libland.
My policy? When I go into a business or store I cold shoulder the woman standing there to help and seek out a male to help me. I recall an era when women in the work force caused a frown. Home Slice rolls against the Lib culture, you see. My response to #MeToo.
Rob De WittOctober 13, 2018, 7:00 AM
Sometimes there is a dish so iconic, so legendary, that unearthing its history becomes a journey into local lore, forgotten recipes, and thrice-cut potato wedges. In Springfield, Illinois, that dish is the Horseshoe.
“Iconic.”
“Legendary.”
“Local lore.”
Odd, I was born in Springfield, Illinois, in 1945 and lived there until I was 18. I’ve never heard of this concoction.
Polly TessOctober 13, 2018, 9:12 AM
It was rude to discuss genitals, male or female, in polite mixed company once upon a time. Maybe someday that will make a comeback. Or perhaps women will finally learn to avoid male bastions where they are unwelcome.
Cold shouldering female retail help? Really? That’s hardcore.
JackOctober 13, 2018, 9:37 AM
I saw that cameltoe right off the bat and searched diligently for the other two but I was not disappointed when I realized was that the prettiest of the three delivered the c’toe for our squinting viewing pleasure.
I had a bunch of cap guns when I was a kid but those things freak sick modern day fuckers out so badly that they require EMSA and oxygen at the mere suggestion of the toy. That bunch hates camel toes just as badly.
Rob De WittOctober 13, 2018, 10:37 AM
It was rude to discuss genitals, male or female, in polite mixed company once upon a time. Maybe someday that will make a comeback. Or perhaps women will finally learn to avoid male bastions where they are unwelcome.
Rude, yes. More to the point, stupid and unimaginative.
If the recognition of rudeness ever does make a comeback, maybe I could try marriage again. Even at my age.
ghostsniperOctober 13, 2018, 3:01 PM
“It was rude to discuss genitals…”
I wrote camel toe.
You inferred genitalia.
Either you are psychic or you are less polite than you are implying.
Polite is as polite does.
Polite people behave as if impoliteness doesn’t exist, in other words, they take the high road.
Grace is not an acquired quality, either you have it or you don’t.
Polly TessOctober 13, 2018, 4:11 PM
Well, Ghost, whatever did you mean?
Polly TessOctober 13, 2018, 4:24 PM
I’m not averse to anatomical jokes when they reference the subject matter at hand. It just seemed a bit gratuitous, especially Casey’s comments about shunning female retail clerks. Please forgive my rudeness in expressing that observation. I didn’t mean to offend, even though I’ve never claimed to be especially gracious.
ghostsniperOctober 14, 2018, 9:32 AM
Polly, no need to get all defensive, we welcome less gracious here, with open arms, and a half doz IPA’s.
Stick around, it gets better.
Rob De WittOctober 14, 2018, 10:26 AM
Polly Tess, don’t apologize, you’re being gaslighted.
Winging my way back home after my last away biz trip for the year. I felt some pressure from me too fers on my last trip, and when culture plays stupid games my response at this point is to avoid culture’s trap. Good to question everything, such as women in the workforce.
Just sayin. If someone’s urinating on my sleeping bag, and then telling me it’s raining, I react.
Real World Address for Donations, Mash Notes and Hate Mail
Gerard Van der Leun
1692 MANGROVE AVE
APT 379
Chico, Ca 95926
Green Pants Interior by Klahn
Who Am I? by Carl Sandburg
My head knocks against the stars.
My feet are on the hilltops.
My finger-tips are in the valleys and shores of universal life.
Down in the sounding foam of primal things I reach my hands and play with pebbles of destiny.
I have been to hell and back many times.
I know all about heaven, for I have talked with God.
I dabble in the blood and guts of the terrible.
I know the passionate seizure of beauty
And the marvelous rebellion of man at all signs reading “Keep Off.”
My name is Truth and I am the most elusive captive in the universe.
Duty, Beauty, Liberty, Country, Honor, Family, Faith — Plus a few simple easy to follow rules for guys
Men saw the stars at the edge of the sea
They thought great thoughts about liberty
Poets wrote down words that did fit
Writers wrote books
Thinkers thought about it
Take it where you find it
Can’t leave it alone
You will find a purpose
To carry it on
Mainly when you find it
Your heart will be strong
About it
Many’s the road I have walked upon
Many’s the hour between dusk and dawn
Many’s the time
Many’s the mile
I see it all now
Through the eyes of a child
Take it where you find it
Can’t leave it alone
You will find a purpose
To carry it on
Mainly when you find it
Your heart will be strong
About it
[Chorus]
Lost dreams and found dreams
In America
In America
In America
Lost dreams and found dreams
In America
In America
In America
And close your eyes
Leave it all for a while
Leave the world
And your worries behind
You will build on whatever is real
And wake up each day
To a new waking dream
Take it where you find it
Can’t leave it alone
You will find a purpose
To carry it on
Mainly when you find it
Your heart will be strong
About it
[Chorus]
Change, change come over
Change come over
Talkin’ about a change
Change, change
Change come over, now
Change, change, change come over
I’m gonna walk down the street
Until I see
My shining light
I’m gonna walk down the street
Until I see
My shining light
I’m gonna walk down the street
Until I see
My shining light
I’m gonna walk down the street
Until I see
My shining light
I see my light
See my light
See my shining light
I see my light
See my light
See my shining light
Why fake miniatures depicting Islamic science are everywhere Besides the colours being a bit too vivid, and the brushstrokes a little too clean, what perturbed me were the telescopes. The telescope was known in the Middle East after Galileo developed it in the 17th century, but almost no illustrations or miniatures ever depicted such an object. When I tracked down the full image, two more figures emerged: one also looking through a telescope, while the other jotted down notes while his handspun a globe – another instrument that was rarely drawn. The starkest contradiction, however, was the quill in the fourth figure’s hand. Middle Eastern scholars had always used reed pens to write. By now there was no denying it: the cover illustration was a modern-day forgery, masquerading as a medieval illustration.
1st, 2nd and 3rd Place in the Miss Correct Posture Contest pose with trophies and their X-rays (1956) 
Mitchell Domes @ Milwaukee, Wisconsin The botanical garden holds over 1,000 different plant species, with each of the three domes displaying a different theme: the Tropical Dome, the Desert (Arid) Dome, and a floral Show Dome with rotating seasonal or holiday displays. The unique design of the glass orbs allows 85 percent of available light to transmit to the plants, and large fans are used to draw out heat in the summer so the domes donât overheat. The aluminum tubing on the structures expands and contracts along with the temperature, and visitors can hear it clicking as they walk through the gardens.
Gerard Van der Leun
Comments on this entry are closed.
Is it weird that i kinda like that cap gun after-bang smell?
Dear Joyful,
Yes.
Joyfully yours,
Dr. Jay
I like the smell, too, Joyful. Haven’t smelled it since childhood when my brothers had those cap guns laying around the house. I also like the smell of gasoline. Weird? Not by today’s standards! You have to go way, way out there on the fringe today for folks to label a personal preference weird.
I just smelled that nostalgic cap smell yesterday. I bought my grandson 5 packages of 10 rolls each of caps and the cap gun for his birthday.
One?
We had em all over the house. Got em for christmas, birthdays, all the time. Usually no caps though. sniff Caps didn’t last long in a house with 3 boys and 2 tom-girls. Specially when you took a whole roll and set it on the sidewalk and slammed a baseball bat down on it vertically. whoa
That center xray has a camel toe.
My mother says it was the damdest thing, I was born with a pencil in my hand.
Doctor never seen that before or since.
If I get a terminal disease I’m gonna sit on the porch with a sketch pad and pencil and draw everything that comes to mind, then my wife is going to assemble it into a coffee table book titled, “Dead Man Sketching”. Watch for it on amazon, $19.99, large format.
Done properly, french fries don’t need nothing else cept salt.
“…insanity and government corruption.”
sigh, Twas it ever not?
Ever notice how moths look like flowers?
Yeah, me neither.
“Who had one?”
The better question is: “Who didn’t?”
Definitely had a lot of roll cap guns in my time and noted that as they came to be more and more cheaply made through the 1970s they became nearly non-functional, even when new. The feed mechanisms came to be made out of flimsy sheet metal, prone to bunching up the paper strip instead of feeding it. The problem was exacerbated by the body of the gun being made of molded plastic instead of the sturdier cast metal of the classic “Peacemaker” shown.
I remember ring caps as gradually replacing them, with the advantage of being much louder, albeit more expensive, though gradually those got loused up by cheap construction too — a plastic hammer doesn’t have enough heft to set off any cap properly. I do still fondly remember a solid metal detective snubnose that I actually brought to school to use as a prop in a play (you’d probably end up doing 3-5 in the state pen for that today). Also a wonderful replica Colt Dragoon that my grandmother bought in Spain, which fired plastic caps just like the percussion ones on the original.
All lost in time now, like tears in rain.
And new tires. Another heavenly smell.
I never tried the baseball bat thing, We always took a roll of caps, doubled it over, and squeezed it in a pair of channel lock pliers. Bang the back of the pliers on the sidewalk. Ears would ring for minutes afterwords. Probably why I can’t hear shit, now.
JWM
OK, the “Birds Aren’t Real” thing.
Usually I get dry humor.
But I really couldn’t tell.
What is that?
JWM
Ghost,
Funny, but I draw and doodle all the time. People at work frequently want to see what I drew. The longer and more irrelevant (to me) a meeting gets, the more I doodle in my notebook. I switched from pencil to pen as you are well aware that engineering notation requires black pen.
I recently pulled out some of my pencil drawings from more than 25 years ago to show my two monkeys. Their mother is more artistically talented than me and they just need a few pointers to making fantastic drawings. I have one specific drawing from an old Victoria Secret catalog that is my favorite. I might finally get it framed. I picked it due to sheer contrast and unnatural beauty. Jill Goodacre. Mercy.
I used to have one much like that cap pistol. More than one, actually.
Cameltoe? Obviously you live in free land, Ghostie. Say that shit in the city and harpy wrath ensues.
I live in free land, too. But, in a patch of bad luck I am sitting in NYC, avoiding wimmin. All intercourse with females is subject to rape scrutiny, in Libland.
My policy? When I go into a business or store I cold shoulder the woman standing there to help and seek out a male to help me. I recall an era when women in the work force caused a frown. Home Slice rolls against the Lib culture, you see. My response to #MeToo.
Sometimes there is a dish so iconic, so legendary, that unearthing its history becomes a journey into local lore, forgotten recipes, and thrice-cut potato wedges. In Springfield, Illinois, that dish is the Horseshoe.
“Iconic.”
“Legendary.”
“Local lore.”
Odd, I was born in Springfield, Illinois, in 1945 and lived there until I was 18. I’ve never heard of this concoction.
It was rude to discuss genitals, male or female, in polite mixed company once upon a time. Maybe someday that will make a comeback. Or perhaps women will finally learn to avoid male bastions where they are unwelcome.
Cold shouldering female retail help? Really? That’s hardcore.
I saw that cameltoe right off the bat and searched diligently for the other two but I was not disappointed when I realized was that the prettiest of the three delivered the c’toe for our squinting viewing pleasure.
I had a bunch of cap guns when I was a kid but those things freak sick modern day fuckers out so badly that they require EMSA and oxygen at the mere suggestion of the toy. That bunch hates camel toes just as badly.
It was rude to discuss genitals, male or female, in polite mixed company once upon a time. Maybe someday that will make a comeback. Or perhaps women will finally learn to avoid male bastions where they are unwelcome.
Rude, yes. More to the point, stupid and unimaginative.
If the recognition of rudeness ever does make a comeback, maybe I could try marriage again. Even at my age.
“It was rude to discuss genitals…”
I wrote camel toe.
You inferred genitalia.
Either you are psychic or you are less polite than you are implying.
Polite is as polite does.
Polite people behave as if impoliteness doesn’t exist, in other words, they take the high road.
Grace is not an acquired quality, either you have it or you don’t.
Well, Ghost, whatever did you mean?
I’m not averse to anatomical jokes when they reference the subject matter at hand. It just seemed a bit gratuitous, especially Casey’s comments about shunning female retail clerks. Please forgive my rudeness in expressing that observation. I didn’t mean to offend, even though I’ve never claimed to be especially gracious.
Polly, no need to get all defensive, we welcome less gracious here, with open arms, and a half doz IPA’s.
Stick around, it gets better.
Polly Tess, don’t apologize, you’re being gaslighted.
I’m sorry, I should have made myself more clear.
http://americandigest.org/wp/sorry-boilerplate-apology-demented-americans-offended-offending-will-offend/
Advantage, Polly Tess with Gold Star and Bronzed Leaf Cluster for citing this site.
https://farm6.staticflickr.com/5466/17030547777_c4e507b20e_m.jpg
Winging my way back home after my last away biz trip for the year. I felt some pressure from me too fers on my last trip, and when culture plays stupid games my response at this point is to avoid culture’s trap. Good to question everything, such as women in the workforce.
Just sayin. If someone’s urinating on my sleeping bag, and then telling me it’s raining, I react.